022 - Is your self-worth/identity tied to your job?

• What happens when you have climbed the corporate ladder and one day cannot continue due to health or personal reasons?
• What happens when a parent decides to be a stay home parent or a caregiver?
• What happens when you’ve reached your retirement age and are told to quit?

I remember one incident so vividly - it happened more than 15 years ago. Yet, it still makes me feel embarrassed and ashamed till this day.

I was my hubby’s plus one at a social/networking function. I had just stepped off my advertising climb and into motherhood a couple of months prior.

?

It was a rare night out away from my then 6 month old toddler. Admittedly, I was already feeling a little out of place when I was asked to attend the function.

Even before I got there, decisions like what do I wear? ?Should I put on something that looked like I just came from work, or do I dress down since honestly, I just stepped away from my mothering duties.

?

Anyways, I got there. I was standing in a corner of the dark room hoping to just blend into the background. Whilst waiting for my hubby who just crossed the room to get us our drinks, a suited up lady approached me. Her opening question was “Hi, I’m Sarah (not her real name). What do you do?”

I was so unprepared for the question and it threw me off. I replied as softly as I could “oh, I’m just a mother”. I didn’t even give her my name to start with!

?

The moment that response left my mouth I felt all sorts of emotions. It was like I just wanted the ground to swallow me up. I felt breathless, ashamed and was desperately biting back my tears.

?

Thank goodness it was a dark room. Thank goodness it was so crowded and the music was playing in the background. It was no surprise that I fled. I told myself that I’d never participate in such an event ever again.

When later I had some time to ponder over my in-excusable response, I questioned myself. And to this day when I find myself still contemplating over my response.

I had worked my butt off since I graduated; had an exciting advertising career that looked like I was going somewhere and then I decided to become a mother.

Was that the end? Am I now just a mother?

Don’t get me wrong. I love being a mother. Responsibilities abound but the returns are infinitely invaluable. I think it was me grappling more of what society thinks of me rather than what I think of myself.

?

I had chosen to leave the corporate path; it was a choice I made and one that I’d do it all over again. In any case, I did it twice, thrice. But each time, I still struggled with this identity crisis.

?

What did others think of me? A bum? A non-contributing citizen?

Truth is, it may have been a pause (and not the end) of my career, but I was still a high functioning person trying to care, feed, mould a completely new human being who was completely reliant on me.

?

True that I didn’t have a boss to answer to; I didn’t have to prepare weekly update reports to the team but really is what I do any less important?

?

"Success is not about the job title you hold, but the impact you make on others and the authenticity with which you live." - Michelle Obama

?

Are you known solely by the title on your name card? Is that how people perceive and understand who you truly are?

?

The profound notion that the title on your name card should never define your true self as an individual is one that resonates deeply. In a world where we often judge others based on their job titles and positions, it is crucial to recognise that true authenticity lies beyond these superficial labels. It is important to embrace our genuine selves and encourage others to see us for who we truly are.

?

"The biggest adventure you can take is to live the life of your dreams." - Oprah Winfrey

?

Society has ingrained in us the urge to define ourselves by our job titles. We are often taught to pursue prestigious careers, accumulate accolades, and strive for recognition. However, the danger lies in allowing these titles to overshadow our true essence—the unique qualities, talents, and passions that make us who we are.

?

"Your time is limited, don't waste it living someone else's life." - Steve Jobs

?

Authenticity is the key to personal fulfilment. It means being true to yourself, irrespective of the roles and responsibilities you hold. Remember, you are more than a job title or position. You are a complex blend of experiences, values, dreams, and aspirations. Embrace your authenticity and let it shine through, transcending the limitations of a mere name card.

While we spend a lot of time at work, and we should be striving for great work, but it is not the work that defines us, it is the value we uphold and the impact we create that truly shape part of who we are.

?

"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work." - Steve Jobs

?

It is not uncommon for others to make assumptions about us based on our job titles. People tend to form preconceived notions, often limiting their perception of our abilities, interests, and worth. By refusing to be defined solely by these titles, we challenge these stereotypes and invite others to see us in a different light.?Of course, we should have a genuine love and passion for the work we do, as it plays a significant role in shaping us as individuals.

?

"The only way to do great work is to love what you do." - Steve Jobs

?

Imagine a world where individuals are valued for their compassion, creativity, or resilience rather than the corporate ladder they climb. By emphasising our individuality and uniqueness, we create a space where people are recognised for their authentic selves. It is through this lens that we foster genuine connections, empathy, and understanding.

?

"Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It's about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen." - Brené Brown

?

Authenticity begins with self-awareness. Do not hesitate to let others see the real you.?Engage in conversations that go beyond job titles and explore the diverse dimensions of your personality. Share your experiences, dreams, and challenges openly.?By being vulnerable and genuine, you invite others to do the same, nurturing deep and meaningful connections.

Remember that the title on your name card is just a fraction of who you are. Embrace your authenticity and let it shine in all aspects of your life. Break free from societal expectations, challenge stereotypes, and encourage others to see beyond the labels. Celebrate the richness of human diversity and strive to know people beyond their titles.

?

END

Sylvia is an accomplished professional with a diverse background and a passion for driving business success. With extensive experience in marketing and communications, Sylvia has established herself as a results-oriented leader. Her expertise lies in strategic planning and project management. Throughout her career, she has demonstrated exceptional skills in optimizing operational efficiency, implementing innovative solutions, and fostering strong client relationships. Sylvia is known for her keen business acumen and her ability to navigate complex challenges with confidence and poise. She is also deeply committed to mentoring and empowering others, actively contributing to the growth and development of individuals and teams. With her strong leadership capabilities and unwavering dedication, Sylvia continues to make a significant impact in her field.

Alrick?has been in the advertising industry for the last 27 years.?A CPA by trade, he is currently the COO of TBWA Singapore & Malaysia, and the Chief Pricing Officer for TBWA Asia.?Alrick has been part of the transformation team and operationalising those outcomes with the companies that he has worked for. His interest lies in incorporating technology into businesses, B2B pricing, and?coaching?and mentoring start-ups and troubled businesses.