How to Ensure You Never Get a Job at a Startup So, you want to work directly with founders at a startup? Perfect! Here's a foolproof plan to make sure you never get their attention or land that dream job. Follow these steps meticulously to achieve the opposite of your goal. Step-by-Step Guide to Failure: Step 1: Avoid Networking at All Costs Stay Home: Never attend networking events, meetups, or conferences. The best way to avoid founders is to stay as far away from them as possible. Ignore LinkedIn: Make sure your LinkedIn profile is outdated and filled with irrelevant information. Better yet, don't have one at all. Step 2: Craft the Worst Resume Possible Use Comic Sans: Choose the most unprofessional font to ensure your resume stands out for all the wrong reasons. Include Irrelevant Experience: List every job you've ever had, including that summer you spent as a lemonade stand entrepreneur at age 10. Forget Contact Information: Make it impossible for anyone to reach you by omitting your phone number and email address. Step 3: Be the last applicant. Never apply fast so that your resume gets ignored due to the high volume of applicants. By following this checklist, you'll successfully avoid getting the attention of any startup founders and ensure you never land a job in the startup world. Remember, the key to failure is consistency, so stick to this plan diligently! While Step 1 is something you need to figure out on your own. I can definitely help you out with Step 2 and 3. For Step 2: https://lnkd.in/d_vPnXwK For Step 3: https://lnkd.in/dxqdhfCJ For both Step 2 & 3: https://lnkd.in/dndW4m8z PS: This post is not meant to hurt anyone but to show you what you're doing wrong in a comic way.
