A Light in the Pathway of Darkness--visiting Mother Emanuel AME Church

A Light in the Pathway of Darkness--link and mission statement

On a hot summer morning on June 23rd, I went to church with a friend. The 9th memorial service of a horrifying event that happened years ago.

On June 15, 2015, a young white man with pimples and a bowl haircut walked into a Mother Emanuel AME (African Methodist Episcopal) Church bible study in Charleston, SC. In spite of his awkwardness and being the only white person in group, he was welcomed with open arms. Only he knew his true intentions.

Its congregation founded in 1816, Mother Emanuel is one of the most historic churches in the US and the oldest AME church in the Deep South. The congregation was founded by two historical figures, Morris Brown and Denmark Vesey at the same time of the founding of the AME breakaway from the Methodist Church. You may recognize Vesey from the history books as one who had purchased his own freedom yet organized a slave uprising to flee Charleston. Established long before Emancipation, AME was founded not only to practice Christianity, but to uplift its African-American community and provide some education and self-determination to its members, most of whom were still enslaved. With member families going back before the Civil War (Bethel Church), the Church and its members have been at the center of African American’s quest for equality for centuries. The pimpled young man, Dylan Roof, drove down from NC to this historic church to start a race war. At the conclusion of their bible study, with cold blood and a laser sighted .45, he gunned down 9 victims within the walls of this church.

How would two white guys be welcomed to their Sunday service, 9 years later? While we certainly had people understandably looking us over as we entered the church, everyone was friendly. Reverend Eric Manning went around church shaking guest hands before service began. The first part of service was him repeating “we are still here, and we are still open” several times… a comment that in spite of hate, the doors of Mother Emanuel are still open. He then recognized the survivors and members of the Emanuel 9 committee, who helped in organizing the service. There were pictures of all 9 around the church in front of the beautiful stained glass windows. On each, names and the phrase: “I am still speaking from eternity.” I had a chill and tear as he recognized the growth and struggle of the little girl, now a young woman, who played dead to survive during the shootings. He then said a prayer talking about the solemnity of the moment and telling the story of what happened on this hollow ground and the miraculous sentiment of forgiveness. Shortly after, he asked all visitors to stand. He shared that the church felt honored by our presence. That church was honored we would spend time in prayer with them. We were indeed welcome—and they indeed “are still open.” I didn’t honestly feel worthy of the attention.

The music was beautiful. There was a large pipe organ and a piano with a trumpeter. The choir sang with energy and in harmony. The congregation happily sang and clapped along.

After the hymn, “Praise Him! Praise Him!”, I heard one of the most beautiful invocations I’ve ever heard. You know how some people can just rant? Usually a rant is sourced by anger, something trivial, or something funny. But nowadays, usually a rant of anger. We’ve all seen it. Now imagine a rant, by someone INSPIRED… on GRATITUDE. Think about all of your blessings: health, money, love, family, a beautiful day, people you love in your life, the love of God, all the things anyone ever did for you, the beauty of nature, the taste of good food, the wind in your hair, the sand in your toes, all the simple things we take for granted… rant on THAT! So hard to feel down when reminded of all the things you do indeed have. Indeed, I think maybe only a full heart can have the capacity to forgive. Even if it’s broken.

After a few readings, we read a beautiful insert written by Bishop Richardson, beginning with “‘The doors of the Church are open’ is an announcement made at nearly every service.” I would encourage you to read it in full. It remembers the Emanuel Nine by name. It highlighted the miracle of forgiveness and celebrates hope. It speaks of consolation not only of the church, but of others in pain. Not a dry eye in the church.

The distinguished Reverend Manning then began his sermon. I’m not sure the title, but hope and how God was not finished and is still speaking ran throughout. He implored the congregation to feel what he felt, to see what he saw as he became more and more animated. You could feel he wanted to tell each person there emphatically: God loves you and has plans for you. By the end he even started jumping around, it seemed almost as though he was somehow levitating off the ground! I know he wasn’t, but “if you know what I know… you’d know that he is not finished and continues to speak!”

As the service came to a close and everyone had shared joy, tears and shared humanity… we passed the peace with a shared question: “I’ll pray for you, you pray for me.” We are all in this together. After a service like that, a simple handshake was completely inadequate. These nerdy white men were hugged and shared an awesome moment of shared humanity.

One of my friends (Herb Frazier) co-wrote a beautiful book: We Are Charleston: Tragedy and Triumph at Mother Emanuel. Chapter 12 is titled, “What is Forgiveness?” It explores the true complexity of what it means to forgive. While the survivors at the bond hearing of Dylan Roof offered forgiveness… and miraculously, did so without any coordination and completely spontaneously… not everyone at Mother Emanuel offered forgiveness. What is the right reaction to hate and violence? Perhaps only a heart full of gratitude can offer forgiveness, though it’s more complicated than that. Do we forgive the person while hating the offending acts? Are there some crimes so heinous such that they should never be forgiven? Can we offer forgiveness when it is not even asked? I personally believe grace and forgiveness are the glue that holds society together. We all screw up, though happily only few to this degree. But we still screw up with our family, friends, neighbors, and fellow man. It is only through a courageous act of grace, in understanding that we are all imperfect, that we can get through to the other side of anything.

4 days after this horrific event, after the families were still coming to terms with what happened, after they had identified their dead loved ones, this happened: (begins 2:30) I’m not sure I have ever seen such a spontaneous and courageous act of grace. Yet, I hope and pray I can learn from it. That we all can.

This church’s doors are still open. This community understands joy, loss, oppression, redemption, gratitude. They are normal people, but they are filled with joy, abundance and stand as an inspiration—truly a “light in the pathway of darkness.”

-“If you don’t forgive, you’re letting evil into your heart. You’re the one suffering. You’re the one hating. You have to forgive, for you.” -Felicia Sanders.

“Hate won’t win.” -Alana Simmons