Farnam Street的动态

Listen & Learn...If You Dare

"TAKE A BOW" BY MATT-Q https://lnkd.in/gCg9nrWQ "Treat others the same way you want others to treat you"- we may read or heard this even if we are not religious. That means that one lesson we SHOULD learn through relational pain, trauma and betrayals, is that it should CHANGE our hearts to determine NEVER to inflict that kind of hurt on others because we ourselves know HOW TERRIBLE it feels where you really want to crawl under a rock and just die. But often, we never even consider that because we are mostly self-centred and we probably only realise what HYPOCRITES we have been in our lives, claiming not to be 'personal' and 'objective', when in reality, we were still mostly ruled by our emotions and short term impressions without CROSS REFERENCING, UNDERSTANDING and COMMUNICATING RELATIONALLY first; after having caused a trail of carnage and wreckage to others in our quest to get what we think we alone rightly deserve, so who cares about others? Human nature, sadly, is doomed to let history repeat itself in terms of NEVER really learning from our mistakes in the past because KNOWLEDGE alone can never change anyone from within. In fact, more knowledge can PUFF UP and make one so arrogant at the expense of our intrinsic wellbeing. Many a student I brought through Civics and Moral Education classes would tell me honestly that 'they actually do know what is considered right or wrong'. It's just that they SEE NO NEED to adhere to such a moral compass because the real world in school, and much more so, in the working world, often penalises those who hold onto such values and rewards others who PLAY THE GAME. It is, ironically only when one becomes a VICTIM of INJUSTICE that one BEGINS to really learn and understand that RELATIONSHIPS form the bedrock of our existence but we willingly sacrificed that on the altar of 'success' and eventually, the fruits of what we have sown will bear bitter fruits in our future relationships, response to others and just, life itself. At that juncture, you can EITHER decide to learn from it and be EMPATHETIC towards others as we are fellow sentient beings with dignity OR we can choose to ignore the lesson and HARDEN OUR HEARTS. How we respond determines whether we are willing to STAND UP FOR what we are CONVICTED about or whether we just BEND WITH THE WIND and do what it takes because the means justifies the end. If we're the latter and you've made your bed with it, then congrats, TAKE A BOW because we've gotten your reward in full but one day, we will realise how our actions come back to haunt us with a vengeance when we get a taste of the bitter medicine we willingly inflicted on others. #takeabow #rihana #matthewqueksingapore #hypocrites #neverlearn #humannature #historyteacher #history #injusticeforall #doomedtorepeat #disillusioned #reaping#irony

Differences Are Clear

"UNBROKEN- BUT MY BEST IS NEVER ENOUGH" BY MATT-Q https://lnkd.in/gq_bzqcq This is the 'silent scream' of many who who may have long histories of a mixture of neurodiversity related discrimination and trauma and still, with the belief and support of loved ones, have come through the other side of our very quantitative and results driven culture because they had to learn the hard way, through much relational pain, to work harder and even smarter to survive and get through life. And yet, in spite of how hard they try, they still keep facing rejection where they are told that their "best is never enough". But is that really true in terms of substance, attitude and effort; or is because they think and do things differently from those who are 'normal' even if the essence of what they communicate is meaningful and beneficial if given a chance? Just because they survived the rigors of education does not means that it gets better when they go out into the working world. In fact, in schools, where there is a sheltered environment and support mechanisms which many of us did not enjoy growing up in, at least, have some form of intervention and assistance. But in the working world, which has the slogan and apparent consciousness of inclusivity when it comes to Special Educational Needs (SEN), the chasm between theoretical acknowledgement and practical application remains a very visceral and painful disjunct. High functioning Aspies (those who have ASD) may be very proficient and good in certain disciplines and because they had to SIMPLIFY concepts and methodologies for themselves. But the EXTENT they contribute has to a lot to do with the OPENNESS and RECEPTIVITY of those who are at the receiving end. Unfortunately, as the need for immediate quick fixes and apparent short term success become more prevalent in our internet social media driven age, the PROCESS needed to inculcate critical thinking and skills that can be ADAPTED to different questions becomes less important. We would rather be 'given a fish' rather than being trained 'how to fish', which would require hard work, which we often claim we have little time or patience for. But we have to fulfil our basic duty and WORK HARD for it. Good things, especially for those who are neurodivergent, are never a given outcome; and, UNLESS we are willing to humble ourselves and to WORK FOR IT, then we will have to learn the hard way that free handouts WITHOUT EFFORT can HARM more than HELP. In that context, it is no surprise to see many high functioning Aspies face much hostile antagonism at work. It is not so much if they have nothing to offer of substance, but rather, would ANYONE even give them the OPPORTUNITY to do so; or we prefer to simply 'get rid of them' because CONCLUSIONS have already been formed about them? Small wonder them that 'their best will never be enough" #neverenough#matthewqueksingapore#sepcialeducationalneeds #neverbelong#noshortut #unbroken

Self-worth and self-esteem are essential components of a happy and fulfilling life. When you have a strong sense of self-worth, you're more confident, resilient, and better equipped to handle life's challenges. Our self-worth is not defined by external validation or others' opinions. It's about recognizing our inherent value, worth, and deservingness of love, respect, and happiness. How can you prioritize your self-worth? 1. You are enough: Regardless of your flaws, mistakes, or shortcomings, you are worthy of love, respect, and happiness. 2. Set boundaries: Learn to say "no" to people, situations, or behaviors that drain your energy or make you feel bad about yourself. 3. Practice self-care: Take care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being by engaging in activities that nourish and uplift you. 4. Surround yourself with positivity: Spend time with people who support, encourage, and celebrate you. 5. Focus on your strengths: Rather than dwelling on your weaknesses, focus on your strengths, skills, and accomplishments. 6. Be kind to yourself: Treat yourself with the same kindness, compassion, and understanding that you would offer to a friend. Role of Parenting: Parents, particularly mothers and fathers, play a vital role in shaping their child's self-esteem and self-worth. Their influence can be profound, and their actions can have a lasting impact on their child's emotional and psychological development. Parents can play a significant part in helping their children develop a positive self-image, build resilience, and cultivate a strong sense of self-worth. Mothers often provide emotional support, comfort, and nurturing, which helps children develop a sense of security and self-worth. Mothers can boost their child's self-esteem by offering genuine praise, validation, and encouragement, helping them develop a positive self-image. Mothers are often the primary caregivers, and their behavior, attitudes, and values can significantly influence their child's self-esteem and self-worth. Mothers can help their children develop emotional intelligence by teaching them to recognize, understand, and manage their emotions. - Positive Role Modeling: Fathers can serve as positive role models, demonstrating values such as responsibility, hard work, and integrity, which can help shape their child's self-esteem and self-worth. - Encouraging Independence: Fathers can encourage their children to take risks, try new things, and develop independence, which can help build confidence and self-esteem. - Providing Guidance and Support: Fathers can offer guidance, support, and constructive feedback, helping their children develop problem-solving skills and build resilience. - Showing Physical Affection: Fathers can show physical affection, such as hugs, high-fives, and fist bumps, which can help their children feel loved, valued, and appreciated.

Six Triple Eight, this is a must watch. A few lessons that I highlighted in this movie and took away that align with our daily lives are; 1. Purpose: regardless of your role in the organization or life in general know that you contribute towards a greater success. One should not only be in the forefront to make a difference. By being a part of something/organization your contribution means a lot, you enable the bigger picture. Start looking at yourself as that enabler and if you were not there one part of performance would suffer. From the security guard, cleaner to the CEO everyone is important and as such should be respected and treated with dignity. 2. Leadership: most leaders make the mistake of wanting to seem they know all. Listening to your subordinates can actually take leaders a long way, the knowledge possessed by each individual can help torn things around. Empower people to feel free to express themselves and innovate around you. Allow them the platform and as a leader you shall achieve through them. 3. Vulnerability: this is the part where you show emotions to the team, you could be a leader or subordinate. Being vulnerable is not a sign of weakness, it's a way to call for support from others, after all we are people before all positions etc. It however needs to be done so well that team mates don't feel like it's an excuse or rather distancing oneself from the overall goals which can sometimes be unreasonable. 4. Respect: sometimes you will not get it outright but if eyes are set on the goal, it's just a matter of time before people align and give you the respect. 5. Planning: it is very important and in situations where it feels too much, take the bites in pieces to achieve completion. When sliced accordingly into individual pieces one gets motivated from completing the smaller tasks. There are many other movies out there with their various motivations, so share titles ??

Shocking Reality: The Struggle of America's Middle Class in 2024." ?? This comprehensive analysis sheds light on the profound challenges facing the middle class—challenges that impact not only individual livelihoods but also the very fabric of our democracy. From the erosion of the American Dream to the critical need for political reform and community action, the article offers in-depth insights and encourages a dialogue on finding tangible solutions. As professionals, understanding these dynamics is crucial for shaping a more equitable workplace and society. Let’s engage in this important conversation and explore how we can contribute to meaningful change. #MiddleClassCrisis #EconomicInequality #PoliticalReform #CommunityAction

Five frogs sat on a log. One decided to jump. How many frogs are left? Five. There's a big difference between deciding to jump and actually jumping. Intention does not equal action. #motivationalhumor #riddlemethis #accountability #commitment #executionplan

?? Explore the inspiring story of Ebed-melech, a biblical hero whose courage and righteousness shine through in our latest blog post. His actions teach us invaluable lessons about standing up for what's right, even against all odds. #BiblicalWisdom #LeadershipLessons #EbedMelechStory Read more here: https://zurl.co/wZos

Getting past the "gotcha" mentality is mark of a builder.