Carpenter Smith Consulting, llc

We regularly hear from you (both managers and employees), that while you’re having regular 1:1s, the meetings have become stale, are one-sided, or just don’t feel productive. We hear you and appreciate you sharing with us. To support you today, we’re providing some guidance for Creating Engaging 1:1s, using our simple framework: ?? What were your successes this past week? ?? What were your challenges? ?? What did you learn? ?? What are your suggestions for what you’ll focus on in the upcoming week? ?? What support do you need from me in order to be successful? To make a successful transition to this framework, we recommend that you to communicate to them ahead of time. The important part is that they understand what will change and why, as well as leaving space for their input. These conversations are a great time to put our Reciprocal Influence framework into action by having two-way conversations where they influence you and you influence them. Engaging 1:1s can provide you with space for curiosity, connection, and collaboration. Consider implementing this framework in your 1:1s and let us know how it goes! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #engaging1on1s #EngagingMeetings #reciprocalinfluence #EmployeeEngagement #leadershipdevelopmentcoaching

Last week, we discussed the importance of the?quiet spaces?in life and encouraged you to look for them in your own world. Since then, we’ve heard from some of you that you’d like to be more conscious of these quiet spaces and perhaps even plan for them. You see the benefits of embracing the quiet but need some support in being more mindful about it. So today, we’re sharing some of our thoughts. As you look through these suggestions, consider which one(s) could support you in embracing your spaces: ?? Start your morning with a 5-minute?meditation. ? Use multiple?senses?to notice how your morning coffee or tea, tastes, smells, and feels. ??? Set phone alerts to remind you to pause for 1-5 minutes of?mindful breathing. ??? Make a note mid-day of who or what you’re?grateful?for. ??♀??? Take a short walk or other?movement?during your lunch break. ?? Use your commute time after work, to?dream and wonder. ?? Each evening,?share?a quick text, email, or laugh with a loved one or colleague. In our work and our lives, we’ve noticed that the more we practice and plan for our quiet spaces, the more mindful we end up being of them. We encourage you to find a few minutes each day, to embrace your quiet spaces, and notice if anything changes within you or your world. Let us know what you find! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #quietspaces #embracedowntime #burnoutprevention #pauseandreflect #restandrecharge #executivecoaching

Today, we'd like to take a moment to pause and look for the quiet spaces. Morgan Harper Nichols writes about the importance of the quiet spaces in life, in her writing titled,?"The Rest Between Notes". Morgan is an artist, writer, and musician (among many other things!), and she reminds us in this quote, that resting is just as important as doing. “Let the quiet interludes, wherever they find you, remind you of their importance. These pauses are more critical to the flow of life than they might appear. When restlessness arises, think of rest not as an empty measure where silence prevails, but as a meaningful space between songs—a transition that makes way for something new. Even a single beat of rest can hold significance, creating space for reflection, renewal, and the continuation of life’s melody.” - Morgan Harper Nichols If it speaks to you too, consider clicking through to read her full piece (link in the comments). This week, look for some quiet spaces in your world. As you notice these spaces, we encourage you to pause, breathe, and embrace them. Be well, Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #quietspaces #restandrecover #burnoutprevention #burnoutrecovery #healthandwellness

Today, we’re sharing some of our top recommendations for creating this new reciprocal influence behavior. You’ll see that many of these recommendations focus on our PAUSE framework. If you’ve been with us for any length of time, you’ll know that the PAUSE is another one of the foundations of the work that we do, and it can be a game-changer for your leadership. ?? Before heading into your day or into a conversation, PAUSE to set your intentions. Ask yourself, “If I’m communicating in a way that’s in alignment with my goal of influencing and being influenced by, what will that look like?” ?? When you feel yourself getting reactive, PAUSE and take a breath, a sip of water, or a walk down the hall. Ask yourself, “Is what I’m about to do or say in alignment with my goal of influencing and being influenced by?” ?? Consider setting up a couple of electronic reminders throughout the day to remind you to PAUSE. Ask yourself, “Am I showing up in ways that are in alignment with my goal of influencing and being influenced by?” ?? After a meeting or at the end of your day, PAUSE and check in with yourself. Ask yourself, “Did I show up in a way that was in alignment with my goal of influencing and being influenced by?” ?? Meet regularly with a friend, colleague, teammates, etc. to work on this new behavior, together. Check in regularly, hold each other accountable, and support each other with successes and challenges. ?? Click through for additional details and suggestions. Whether in your personal or professional life, when you regularly lean in to share your best and lean back to allow others space to share their best, you’ll be creating deeper levels of trust, connection, and engagement. Let us know how it goes! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #reciprocalinfluence #influenceandbeinfluencedby #LeadershipInAction #LeadershipSuccess #leadershipdevelopment #leadershipdevelopmentcoaching #executivecoaching

Today, we’re sharing some scripting suggestions for putting reciprocal influence into practice, in your personal life. We're including a few top scenarios below. Click through to the full post with additional suggestions. ?? HEALTHY BOUNDARIES ?? Family members have asked you to help them organize all of the food for a large party. Unbeknownst to them, you’re already overbooked. When you get back to them look for the space between YES and NO. “YES, I’d love to help out AND, I have quite a bit going on right now. What’s possible to push the party out to a later date?” ?? PROBLEM-SOLVING ?? Similar to our professional lives, when a problem or obstacle arises, it’s a natural tendency for many of us to either get derailed or to go off by ourselves to solve it. To create deeper connections, it’s important to look for opportunities to solve problems, together. “I think I’ve come up with the perfect solution to the damage caused, when that big maple tree fell. You always have great ideas too so I thought we could use mine as a jumping off point and work out something even better, together.” ?? MESSY CONVERSATIONS ?? It can be difficult to move through messy conversations while maintaining a healthy level of respect for yourself and for the other person. Try sharing your thoughts and then listening deeply to what they’re saying. “We both have some strong opinions about how to use our tax return money this year. What if we each take a few minutes to write down the benefits and concerns for each idea, and then, work on a solution that we both feel good about." When people feel that their voice and input matters to you, they’ll be more engaged and motivated = deeper connections. Consider what influencing others and allowing others to influence you could look like, in your personal life. Let us know how it goes! Click through to the full post for additional scripting suggestions. Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #reciprocalinfluence #leadershipdevelopment #LeadershipInAction #executivecoaching #psychologicalsafety

Today, we’re sharing some scripting suggestions for how you can put our definition of leadership into action. As a reminder, our definition of leadership is this: ?? Leadership is the willingness to influence your world AND ?? the willingness to be influenced by your world, regardless of role or title. We're including a few common scenarios below. Click through to the full post if you'd like additional scenarios and suggestions. ?? UNCERTAIN TIMES ?? When work is in a state of flux, it’s important to engage with your team often. Get curious and encourage them to share what they’re going through and how they might support each other. “I’d like to take a moment to acknowledge the recent layoffs and the uncertainty you may be feeling right now. I know that it can be distracting, so let’s lean in and share any questions or concerns you have. While I may not be able to speak to all of them, I encourage you to share.” ?? PROBLEM-SOLVING ?? When a problem or obstacle arises, it’s a natural tendency for many of us to either get derailed or to go off by ourselves to solve it. No matter the issue, true leadership requires working together to look for the possibilities. “I’m invested in each of you and in this company, so let’s talk about this current challenge. Let’s share ideas about how we can create success with a new marketing plan. I have some thoughts and would love to hear yours as well.” ?? MESSY CONVERSATIONS ?? It can be difficult to move through messy conversations while staying engaged AND keeping others engaged. To do this, it’s important to remain open, vulnerable, and curious. “I know that these new budget cuts may create extra strain on our team, and I can see that emotions are running hot, right now. Instead of pointing fingers about how we got here, let’s attack the problem, learn from it, and work out a plan for how to move forward, together.” Look through these various scripting suggestions, consider what could work for you and your team. Invite their ideas so that you can create a shared approach, together. As we mentioned above, you can click through to the full post for additional scripting suggestions. Let us know what's worked for you! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #reciprocalinfluence #LeadershipSuccess #LeadershipInAction #executivecoaching #psychologicalsafety #cycleofinfluence

As we've mentioned, we think of leadership as, the willingness to influence your world AND the willingness to allow your world to influence you, regardless of role or title. To support you in what influencing your world and being influenced by your world could look like (and NOT look like), we’ve put together some examples. YOU INFLUENCE YOUR WORLD ?? You step in to share your thoughts and shape the conversation. ?? You share your perspective—even when it differs from what others are saying. ?? You sit up at the table, and you don’t shy away from difficult or messy conversations. Your voice matters! YOUR WORLD INFLUENCES YOU ?? You value what others can bring to the table, and you set them up to succeed in communicating. ?? You create a climate where differences are welcomed and valued. ?? You try to understand other people’s perspectives and strive to come to decisions together. Their voice matters! NOT LEADERSHIP ?? You get reactive and push to get your way. ?? You get reactive and shut down or walk away. ?? You make excuses about why it can’t be done. As you read through this post, consider opportunities where you want to work on influencing others AND being influenced by others. Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #ProfessionalDevelopment #LeadershipSuccess #leadershipdevelopment #executivecoaching #reciprocalinfluence

Last week, we talked about working better together and reviewed our definition of leadership to help you picture what we mean. As a reminder, our definition is this: ?? Leadership is the willingness to influence your world and the willingness to allow your world to influence you, regardless of role or title. ?? We continue to be passionate about changing the way people think about leadership, so today, we’re launching a new series that dives into reciprocal influence in more detail. Next week, we’ll share with you what we mean by influencing others and allowing others to influence you. Then, over the following two weeks we’ll dive into what reciprocal influence could look like for you, both personally and professionally, in these areas: ?? Healthy Boundaries ?? New Relationships ?? Uncertain Times ?? Problem-Solving ?? Messy Conversations Where can you show up as a leader who shares their best and also invites others to do the same? We'd love to know! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #reciprocalinfluence #executivecoaching #LeadershipSuccess #leadershipdevelopment #LeadershipInAction

Despite the best of envisioning our future and planning for success, we know that sh!t happens that can pull us off track! So, the question is, “How can you stay on track?” Look through these suggestions and consider what you could put in place to help you stay on track: ?? PAUSE in the morning, mid-day, or in the evening to check-in with yourself. ?? Identify a word or phrase that sums up your vision for the year. Put this somewhere you’ll see it often, as a way to quickly remind you of your intentions. ?? Speak to yourself with grace and kindness on those days when you find that you haven’t focused on your priorities. ?? Leave inspirational notes around your house, office, or car, to let yourself know, “I’ve got this!” ?? Schedule a check-in with yourself every 1-3 months to celebrate successes and to try new small steps if needed. ?? Create a tracking board or document (a wall calendar works great too) where you can regularly record how you’re doing. ?? Make a new note to yourself each day, week, or month with your 1-3 top priorities that you want to focus on. ?? Find an accountability colleague, friend, or coach you could meet with weekly or monthly, to help keep you on track. ?? Schedule alerts on your phone or calendar that remind you of your vision of success. Don’t leave this step to chance! If you can regularly remind yourself of your priorities, vision of success, and why they’re important to you, you’ll be more apt to keep moving forward—even when life gets off track. Click the link in the comments for a PDF combining this whole series of planning posts. Thanks for joining us in this practice! - Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #yearlyplanning #ExecutiveCoaching #accountabilitycoaching #yourpriorities #yoursuccess #realisticideation

Now that we’ve taken a look back at?Your Yesterday?and your?Your Tomorrow, we’d like to support you to live in alignment with your vision. So, the question is, “How can you set yourself up for success?” Today, we're taking you through a version of Realistic Ideation. A term that we know about from the amazing Caroline Webb's book "How to Have a Good Day". Realistic Ideation is when you: ?? Envision the outcome you want (if you need support with this, check out our post from last week!) ?? Identify the obstacles that are mostly likely going to get in your way. ?? Plan for both of the above. Click through to read our full post where we'll walk you through naming your obstacles and creating a plan to get around them. We'd love to know what comes up for you! Linda Carpenter PhD, Stephanie Smith, and Heather Stewart #realisticideation #planforobstacles #yearlyplanning #executivecoachingandconsulting