Cairn Leadership Strategies

Over the last two weeks I have shared articles about understanding and regulating emotions. This week I dive into how and when to use empathy. You might be surprised. Emotional empathy has a lot of downsides (enough for Paul Bloom to write an entire book about them). Cognitive empathy has a lot of upsides (and you probably are not as good at it as you think you are). Caring is a skill, NOT a perspective. If you are not on our leadership tips email, get on it here before this article comes out! https://lnkd.in/ghJ_DeUf Next week, I will be putting it all together with a breakdown of social skills. Don't miss it!

Not having high emotional perception and understanding is like going to a foreign country without knowing any of their language or culture. You have fun and bumble around from sight to sight, but you miss the main thing. You smile and point a things, but get frustrated and can't express why. You don't make any new friends or connections because no one can talk to you. It's generally an OK experience, but could have been SO much better. In our most recent article I share highly practical ways to increase your emotional literacy without signing up for a Rosetta Stone tone and body language course (that does not exist.) If you read it, I would love to hear what you think! Did it work? Are there different ways you have learned to perceive and understand your emotions? https://lnkd.in/gh6P6a2a

We deliver custom leadership workshops for teams of 3-50, anywhere in the U.S. The adventures range from walking in an arboretum to scaling technical mountains. Floating a river with your team in canoes to five day expeditions including rock climbing, backpacking, and canoe camping. We can stay in lodges and hike classic mountains in North Carolina, find you a hut in the Rockies, mountain bike to a yurt in Utah, or backpack in the Olympic Mountains in WA. The world is your oyster. This approach works. People learn more. People have fun. You go home with incredible shared memories. Your team goes to their families excited to share "you won't believe what we did" stories with their kids. Curious? Take 90 seconds to fill out this survey and we will shoot you a couple ideas that might work for your team! https://lnkd.in/gxUt8nHp

It was on a NOLS course that I first heard someone say that they valued equanimity. This means accepting the world around us without labeling what happens from moment to moment as 'good' or 'bad.' Equanimity is invaluable in austere environments like Alaska where a pleasant sunny day can turn into a snowstorm without warning. It's also a path to a more stable and productive life. Instead of getting angry at the unfair weather ruining our day, we can celebrate with a snowball fight. Good? Bad? It just depends. Equanimity is not about not caring, it's about putting space between us and our (sometimes) arbitrary beliefs. It's about allowing room for the opposite of our beliefs to exist. It's about multiplying opportunities that chance puts in our ways by not judging too quickly. In emotional regulation, Stoics looked at equanimity like a spinning top. When you poke a top, it wobbles a few times and then spins back to a stable equilibrium. In this weeks #emotionalintelligence breakdown, I explore this and other tools you can use to more effectively regulate your emotions. You'll read how to start responding to emotions intentionally instead of reacting in ways you regret. If you are not signed up for our leadership tips, get on the list (link in comments!) Thank you Cole for making me think more deeply on equanimity!

It was on a NOLS course that I first heard someone say that they valued equanimity. This means accepting the world around us without labeling what happens from moment to moment as 'good' or 'bad.' Equanimity is invaluable in austere environments like Alaska where a pleasant sunny day can turn into a snowstorm without warning. It's also a path to a more stable and productive life. Instead of getting angry at the unfair weather ruining our day, we can celebrate with a snowball fight. Good? Bad? It just depends. Equanimity is not about not caring, it's about putting space between us and our (sometimes) arbitrary beliefs. It's about allowing room for the opposite of our beliefs to exist. It's about multiplying opportunities that chance puts in our ways by not judging too quickly. In emotional regulation, Stoics looked at equanimity like a spinning top. When you poke a top, it wobbles a few times and then spins back to a stable equilibrium. In this weeks #emotionalintelligence breakdown, I explore this and other tools you can use to more effectively regulate your emotions. You'll read how to start responding to emotions intentionally instead of reacting in ways you regret. If you are not signed up for our leadership tips, get on the list (link in comments!) Thank you Cole for making me think more deeply on equanimity!

We deliver custom leadership workshops for teams of 3-50, anywhere in the U.S. The adventures range from walking in an arboretum to scaling technical mountains. Floating a river with your team in canoes to five day expeditions including rock climbing, backpacking, and canoe camping. We can stay in lodges and hike classic mountains in North Carolina, find you a hut in the Rockies, mountain bike to a yurt in Utah, or backpack in the Olympic Mountains in WA. The world is your oyster. This approach works. People learn more. People have fun. You go home with incredible shared memories. Your team goes to their families excited to share "you won't believe what we did" stories with their kids. Curious? Take 90 seconds to fill out this survey and we will shoot you a couple ideas that might work for your team! https://lnkd.in/gxUt8nHp

We deliver custom leadership workshops for teams of 3-50, anywhere in the U.S. The adventures range from walking in an arboretum to scaling technical mountains. Floating a river with your team in canoes to five day expeditions including rock climbing, backpacking, and canoe camping. We can stay in lodges and hike classic mountains in North Carolina, find you a hut in the Rockies, mountain bike to a yurt in Utah, or backpack in the Olympic Mountains in WA. The world is your oyster. This approach works. People learn more. People have fun. You go home with incredible shared memories. Your team goes to their families excited to share "you won't believe what we did" stories with their kids. Curious? Take 90 seconds to fill out this survey and we will shoot you a couple ideas that might work for your team! https://lnkd.in/gxUt8nHp

Teams are dynamic. They change from moment to moment and need different skills and behaviors from members and leaders from moment to moment. Unfortunately humans think statically. When I have a certain emotion I think of it as how I am not a moment in time that is rapidly changing. When I look at a lake I see a lake, not a massive watershed system of evaporation, rain, and snow melt in dynamic tension. I don't think this is going to change, but it's a good reminder to stay adaptable from moment to moment, not from week to week. I've taken a lot of groups up to the top of Mount Washington in the winter, but taking this group of United States Naval Academy staff on a winter summit was a dream come true to me. We dug into building community, exploring emotions, practicing perspective taking, testing out motivation theories, a lot of deep shared laughter, and some serious reflection. Huge thank you to the fellows and Celeste Raver, PhD for trusting us on a winter climb in New Hampshire and giving it everything you had!

We deliver custom leadership workshops for teams of 3-50, anywhere in the U.S. The adventures range from walking in an arboretum to scaling technical mountains. Floating a river with your team in canoes to five day expeditions including rock climbing, backpacking, and canoe camping. We can stay in lodges and hike classic mountains in North Carolina, find you a hut in the Rockies, mountain bike to a yurt in Utah, or backpack in the Olympic Mountains in WA. The world is your oyster. This approach works. People learn more. People have fun. You go home with incredible shared memories. Your team goes to their families excited to share "you won't believe what we did" stories with their kids. Curious? Take 90 seconds to fill out this survey and we will shoot you a couple ideas that might work for your team! https://lnkd.in/gxUt8nHp

Psychological safety is not about withholding criticism. It’s about enabling people to speak up without fear. The goal is not to lower our standards. It’s to replace knee-jerk reactions with open-minded consideration. All ideas are welcome. Not all views are equally valid. As Amy Edmondson says: "Make it discussable."