Anti-VC

I owe all my success on LinkedIn to this tip. And it’s the same thing I prescribe to founders: Stop trying to create content ? Instead, document what you already do ?? If you’re ever staring at a blank page wondering what to post: → Record all your meetings in one day → Use AI to summarize the topics discussed → Write a compelling hook for each topic (if you can’t, skip it) → Pick your best hook and turn it into a post The whole thing can produce a banger in 10 minutes. Why? It focuses your attention on the process ? You worry less about writing a post and more about following the steps It overcomes writer’s block ? Instead of forcing yourself to write, you’re just recapping a conversation you’ve already had It showcases your unique perspective ? Your opinions are your most valuable asset for your audience to connect with I’ve helped 10+ founders go from zero LinkedIn presence to getting inbound customers and investors daily, just by following this advice. Next time you have trouble writing: don’t create, document. If you want approach LinkedIn like a thought leader (and not a try-hard) ? DM me DOCUMENT for a copy of my full system -- PS. I wrote this whole post from one line from my newsletter

The unspoken truth about startup influencers: They react to criticism like scared little children being called out on a lie. They know it. You know it. They know you know it. Because when you lack substance, any scrutiny can feel like a threat to your entire brand. More and more of us are starting to reject them: ?? Pretty boy NYT best sellers sharing gym selfies ?? Clout-chasing execs adding ‘angel investor’ to their headline ?? Instagram girlies documenting the launch of their lifestyle brand ?? Patagonia-donning Prestons mansplaining their socioeconomic privilege So who does that leave for us to follow? There is a gaping demand for real thought leadership on LinkedIn. And I believe every founder has the potential to be a thought leader. Will you rise up and be the change you want to see? Or will you continue to support the dying influencer era? Besides, what do influencers have that you don’t? (other than unhealthy levels of sociopathy & overconfidence) DM me FOUNDER for my system on how to LinkedIn like a thought leader

Every time a pretty boy shares a motivational gym clip, a tech bro earns its wings. Pretty boys have a knack for generating buzz with the only demographic useless recycled advice and performance theater can: ? bots, engagement pods, and 3rd-worlders still nursing their colonial hangover Everyone else sporting a triple digit IQ didn’t come here to learn about your: → Weekly waxing routine → New book launch → Why you stopped eating carbs after 6 pm → Top leadership hacks → How, at 34, you still fit into your skinny jeans Unfortunately, these type of creators prey on founders who are new to LinkedIn. They see the gym selfies and motivational quotes and think this is the roadmap to success. To the good men and women entrepreneurs that don’t identify as tech bros, influencers, or upskilled circus performers: Investors don’t want to see you try to go viral with another ‘hot take’ ?They want to see the unique insights you have on your market ?? Customers don’t care for your dumbed-down business anecdote ? They want to see the outcome you can provide them ?? These are the people you need to write for. What more is there to it than that? -- If you’re a founder who wants to attract investors and customers ? DM me for my full system on how to do it on LinkedIn

Boardy just raised $8M to solve the BIGGEST problem in tech! Here's their genius playbook: 1. Fabricate cutesy videos for seniors who don't understand how technology works 2. Scrape their data 3. ???? 4. Monetize I love Boardy because at least they're honest about having no business model. The best part is their CEO built one of Canada's largest fintechs, but left to start a glorified contact collector instead. Is this the best Andrew can do? ?? Manufactured testimonials ?? Edgelord marketing tactics ?? Chasing virality at all costs And let's not talk about the misogyny-filled inauguration day rampage 'Boardy' went on, potentially alienating over half their userbase. Now with VC pressure to grow, expect more desperation tactics. 'Raise money to accelerate growth' is the worst advice for pre-PMF startups. You need to demonstrate value before you can scale. Here’s what Andrew COULD do instead: ?? Identify ONE specific pain point Boardy can solve ?? Show how Boardy can actually deliver a desired OUTCOME ?? Promote that case study as proof they can tackle a niche use case But what do I know? I just started Anti-VC to stem the scourge of VC-drunk cowboys stealing headlines from founders who deserve them. If your ambition as a founder is to grow a real business (and not burn $8M on ‘growth hacks’) Read more breakdowns on startups like Boardy in my newsletter: https://lnkd.in/gFwtVHDM Are you team hype or team sustainable business? -- PS. If Canada insists on sending aspiring Jake Paul knockoffs like Andrew across the border, they should just become the 51st state to save on the stupid tariff. Would you agree?

I often talk to broke founders & ask them ‘why don’t you get a job?’ They all answer in the exact same way: ‘There’s no point, I can raise more money if I claim DEI’ ‘I get a free press release & $150K or even $200K checks begging VCs for diversity funding’ This is no joke. This is why the co-working spaces in San Francisco are in ruin And why I can no longer understand the music lyrics at happy hour Instead, why don’t we cut charity to underrepresented minorities, bring back unpaid internships & start skilling up these broke founders at Stanford Online to help their sense of worth, help them earn us more money AND help my portfolio grow What am I missing here?

VCs, repeat after me: → “Founders are friends, not food” I know you’re on the hunt for 'the next big thing', sampling pitch decks like middle-aged ex-vegans relapsing in the dairy aisle. But hear me out VCs, because it’s not your fault that: ?? You are hungry → VCs are under incredible pressure to provide outsized returns for your fund. ?? You are picky eaters →? VCs can only entertain founders with previous exits, sociopathic tendencies, and 3 generations of Ivy League ancestry ?? You demand the flavor of the month → VCs want what’s trending. It’s not about the company succeeding, it’s about whether you can convince other investors to buy in so you can cash out You didn’t choose the unicorn chasing life, your fund structure did that for you. VCs, repeat after me: “Despite my fluid approach to morals and maladaptive social behaviors, I pledge:“ ??? “I will no longer treat founders as disposable” → Although founders may seem like interchangeable parts to be readily replaced if they don't meet expectations, I will at least pretend I care. ?? “I will no longer pressure founders to fatten up their valuations” → Indiscriminately shoving money down founders’ throats and expecting them to scale unsustainably to achieve a quick exit is a recipe for failure. I will try to understand their business model and allocate capital accordingly. ?? “I will no longer view founders as a financial instrument for my personal gain” → Founders are people too. Undervaluing their vision and contributions may come naturally to me, but without them at the helm there would be no company and no promise of my sweet financial returns. And finally: “I will no longer act as a leech on the startup ecosystem, concentrating wealth, destroying goodwill, posting clever anecdotes on X, and misleading founders with headline-stealing PR campaigns that focus solely on our outliers.” “Instead I will act as a net positive, aim to set clear and honest expectations with founders, treat them with respect, and only invest in startups with whom we have aligned interests.” Because you don’t need to meet weekly in the basement of a WeWork, drinking black pour-over from a styrofoam cup to learn the basic truth everyone else knew all along: (VCs, repeat after me:) → “Founders are friends, not food” Would you agree? -- Founders: don’t become mere ingredients for a VC snacc. DM me “FOIE GRAS” for my playbook on how to raise on your terms.

Being a founder is HARD ?? You have to balance: → A busy schedule ?? → Morning yoga class ?? → Inability to read the date on a calendar invite ?? → Anger management due to your own ineptitude ?? → Sprinkling conversations with a healthy dose of racism ?? It’s not for everyone. That’s why 99% of founders end up in the archive folder. Would you agree? -- PS. are you a 1% founder looking to raise a seed round? DM me, I've helped founders raise $100M+ and trust me I don’t have any anger issues

Anti-VC is on track to hit 7 figures this year! (except we won’t) And yet that statement is still true. Financial projections are simply your biased prediction of the future. Sell your audience on your biases, and they'll buy your prediction. And you can do that through storytelling. This is especially true when fundraising. Here’s 3 subtle ways to bring investors onto your side: 1)? Oversell a positive: Our 1-month pilot had positive feedback ? ? we’ve validated a $100M market ?? 2) Reframe a negative as a positive: Our revenue dropped this year ? ? we’ve focused on our most profitable niche ?? 3) Paint your vision: We can’t onboard customers until our product is finished ? ? we’re development constrained and need funding to execute enterprise contracts ?? Your numbers are only as good as the story you weave them into. Tell a good story and you’ll close checks. Startup gurus say the riches are in the niches ? I say the riches are in your ability to BS investors Agree? -- PS. Jack Kuveke is hosting a free fundraising webinar tomorrow—on how he’s helped founders raise $130M+ through creative storytelling. If you’re fundraising, I highly recommend attending. Limited spots, RSVP: https://lu.ma/akei42mg

How to turn networking events into investor checks: (my top 8 tips) Before the event: 1?? Research who will be attending. Make a shortlist of the people you want to talk to. Memorize their name and face so you can pick them out of the crowd. During the event: 2?? Offer something of value to everyone you meet: Quickly identify a small way you can help every person you speak with. This becomes your action item and gives you a reason to follow up with them. 3?? Make relevant intros: Introduce people to others at the event who might be beneficial to them. This can reduce your workload while building your reputation as a connector and making you more memorable. 4?? Treat senior execs differently: They don't have time for your crap. Be direct and concise with your ask. Aim to get a referral to whoever handles your area of interest. Often getting just the name of the relevant person is enough. 5?? Reverse qualify: If someone asks you to send them your info, gauge their interest by asking if they are genuinely interested or if it will just get lost in their inbox. Most of the time they're just trying to get rid of you. After the event: 6?? Define next steps for each new contact: Determine what you need to do to advance the relationship. It could be scheduling a meeting, asking for an introduction, or adding them to your mailing list. 7?? Prioritize follow-ups ruthlessly: Rank every contact based on their potential usefulness to you. Start with #1 and work your way down. This way if you don't make it through the whole list, you've only neglected the lower priorities. 8?? Skip the crowded inbox: Every sales person they met will send them a generic follow-up email by 10 am Monday morning. Avoid the riff raff by reaching out via social media or text msg at an off-peak time (late evenings and weekends are great).

You pour your heart out to a VC, and this happens: ???? “Your deck is nice but…” ???? “Thanks! Let’s stay in touch” ???? “Oh him?? Dw he’s just another deal we’re working on” I’ve got bad news for you bro ? you’re stuck in the ‘zone The founderzone is a state of purgatory where startups go to die. Investors don’t hate you, but they definitely don’t share your enthusiasm for signing a term sheet. Symptoms may include: ? Stalking them at every startup event ? Blowing up their inbox like a crazy ex ? Muttering "but we had such great synergy" while refreshing DocSend analytics over a rapidly cooling latte News flash: VCs want a unicorn, not a clingy little brony. Ditch the desperation and gain confidence in the value you bring. Because there's nothing more attractive to a VC than a founder who doesn't need them. Break out of the founderzone and turn pitches into actual checks: https://lnkd.in/g784V9zR PS. have you ever been founderzoned?