Working with a difficult team member can be frustrating, stressful, and demotivating. But it doesn't have to ruin your project or your relationship. In this article, you'll learn some practical strategies to turn things around and improve your collaboration with a challenging co-worker.
Before you can address the problem, you need to understand what's causing it. Is it a personality clash, a communication breakdown, a lack of trust, a difference in expectations, or something else? Try to be objective and empathetic, and avoid making assumptions or judgments. Ask yourself how you might be contributing to the conflict, and what you can do to change your behavior or perspective.
En cualquier equipo de trabajo existen situaciones de diferencia de opinión o perspectiva que pueden causar conflictos. La postura que adoptes ante estas situaciones es importante para poder mantener el profesionalismo y la comunicación en el equipo. Si encuentras una persona “dificil” con la que no compartes opinión o forma de pensar lo primero que tienes que hacer es entender de dónde viene el conflicto. Stephen Covey dice: “busca comprender, antes de ser comprendido”, trata de comunicarte, entender la situación de esa persona y el origen de su diferencia o problema, no emitas juicios sobre la persona o su actitud porque no sabes de dónde viene. Si no logras establecer rapport, busca apoyo de un supervisor.
Lo importante es decir la verdad de la situación con objetividad demostrando el impacto de no cambiar y lo positivo de hacer los cambios. Escuchar con empatía y promover cambios y primeros pasos con apoyo sostenido.
Once you have a clear idea of the issue, you need to communicate it to your team member in a respectful and constructive way. Don't avoid or delay the conversation, as this can make things worse. Choose a suitable time and place, and prepare what you want to say. Focus on the facts, not the emotions, and use "I" statements instead of "you" statements. For example, say "I feel frustrated when you miss the deadlines" instead of "You are always late and irresponsible". Listen actively to their point of view, and acknowledge their feelings and concerns.
First, identify the Social Style of the other person. Then reflect on how that style is the same or different than yours. Finally, modify your communication approach to match what makes the other person comfortable. By showing interpersonal versatility, you build trust and gain insights into how the other person approaches conflict.
Moldear tu enfoque de comunicación es muy importante. Recriminar o insultar no es el camino para lograr un mejor resultado porque pone a la otra persona a la defensiva y porque una ofensa da?a la relación. Busca ser siempre objetivo y enfócate en el hecho, en datos concretos. Evita las opiniones o los sentimientos, trata de ser empatizó con la posición y situación de la otra persona. Deja que el otro hable y exprese su punto de vista, escucha atentamente al contenido y a lo que dice el otro, u cómo lo dice, qué lenguaje corporal usa, para tener un diagnóstico completo. Trata de llegar a acuerdos que los dos puedan seguir y revisar objetivamente. Un acuerdo en un momento dado podría llegar a ser separarse del equipo/rol; es una posibilidad
After you have expressed your issue and heard their side, you need to work together to find solutions that can satisfy both of you. Don't try to impose your will or blame them for everything. Instead, brainstorm ideas that can address the root causes of the problem, and evaluate them based on their feasibility and effectiveness. Try to find common ground and compromise where possible, and agree on specific actions and timelines. Write down your agreement and follow up regularly to monitor the progress.
When issues arise with a team member, seeking solutions from him as a first step is an effective way of empowering him and taking him along. Difficulty in working with a team member could be due to psychological reasons on his part. Setting aside our ego, when we approach the problem with a human interface and empathy, the particular team member may shed his rugged mindset and possibly soften his stance. Through a cordial chat and showing acceptance of his genuinity, we can move forward to the next level. Most often it is observed that psychological barriers could be overcome by being authentic and consistent. Communication followed by compromise can lead to workable solutions in the team. Leader need not be rigid on his own solution.
Another way to improve your relationship with a difficult team member is to ask for feedback on your own performance and behavior. This can show that you are open to learning and improving, and that you value their opinion. It can also help you identify your strengths and weaknesses, and address any gaps or misunderstandings. Be respectful and appreciative when you receive feedback, and don't take it personally or defensively. Use it as an opportunity to grow and develop your skills and competencies.
Assessing tone of voice and word choice is often difficult to do alone. When you allow a neutral third party to mediate the conversation toward resolution, you acknowledge that you might be a co-contributor to the friction in the professional relationship. This can dramatically shift the team member in question to a more receptive position during the mediation & going forward. As a growing leader, take the added step of asking that employee to privately call to attention word choice or tone of voice (as close to the moment as possible) that does not honor the mediation but instead diminished an engagement opportunity that was meant to have a positive, productive effect.
If you have tried the above strategies and still find it hard to work with a difficult team member, you may need to seek support from others. This could be your manager, your mentor, your coach, or your peers. They can offer you advice, guidance, feedback, or mediation, depending on the situation. However, be careful not to badmouth or complain about your team member, as this can damage your reputation and credibility. Instead, focus on the facts and the solutions, and ask for help in a professional and respectful way.
Finally, don't let a difficult team member affect your mood, motivation, or performance. Try to maintain a positive attitude and outlook, and focus on the things that you can control and influence. Remember that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and that diversity can be a source of creativity and innovation. Appreciate the contributions and achievements of your team member, and celebrate the successes and milestones of your project. By doing so, you can turn a challenge into an opportunity, and a conflict into a collaboration.
Practicar la empatía al tratar con colegas difíciles, reconociendo que pueden tener razones personales detrás de su comportamiento. Trata de escuchar de manera activa y de entender sus puntos de vista.
Las personas venimos de diferentes lugares, tenemos diferentes historias que forman nuestro criterio. Tenemos que estar abiertos a que otros tengan diferentes versiones y puntos de vista y nuestro rol, si somos líderes de un grupo, es tratar de integrar y buscar incluir la opinión de todos en busca de un resultado de grupo. Hay también diferentes estilos y formas: unos son más directos, más emocionales, más analíticos o más integradores. Hay que aprender a navegar también entre estos caracteres y formas para entender a los demás y ayudarnos a buscar métodos de comunicación y liderazgo adecuados.
I’ll admit it. I was that difficult team member. I’m not an antagonist, but I came off that way. In my mind, I like to keep things straight, remove the politics and have no sucking-up. Yeah - like that’s going to happen in a corporate environment. So as the difficult one, I would have an ice wall between myself and those who I didn’t think were “genuine”. Well - I may have kept my pride and integrity, but I sure didn’t gain any lunch ?? buddies. One day, the guy who I was the coldest with, asked me if I wanted to get a sandwich together. I was shocked! As we walked, he asked me what I liked - for food, in a workplace, etc. Having the opportunity to share, I gave my views and he shared his views. ??This is sandwich ?? diplomacy.