You’re an environmental consultant. How can you use emotional intelligence to manage conflict with clients?

As an environmental consultant, use emotional intelligence for conflict management by actively listening, showing empathy, regulating emotions, resolving conflicts collaboratively, communicating effectively, building trust, and being adaptable.

Self-awareness is the first step for you to be able to identify your emotions and responses, and guide your reactions, then when dealing with other people, make a better emotional connection by identifying their emotional states, and react accordingly.

When listening, listen to "understand", not to respond. Usually when we are listening, the moment we hear something needing a justification our brain stops listening, and begins to elaborate a response, so the rest of the message and communication is lost. Try to listen until the end, analyze what you heard and paraphrase in order to verify your understanding.

It's called "active listening." That means a few things: gearing us to really listen to what someone is saying—not just waiting for your chance to chime in. It means observing the verbal and non-verbal cues someone is giving you, and truly reading the body language. Simply put, active listening means listening with intent to fully hear what someone else is saying without feeling the need to respond or take up space in the room. Sometimes, its best to sit back, actively listen, and let the client you're engaging with take the stage. Sometimes, just the act of hearing someone out can go a long way and solve the conflict that you're experiencing as many people just want to be heard.

Being assertive does not translate to being aggressive. This is about being clear in what you mean when you say something, clear in reporting back the facts (not opinions) and clear in explaining that you've heard what they've had to say, you are ready to now respond, and you're going to factor in the points they've made with purpose and compassion.

It's hard to hear and accept feedback at times. It doesn't feel great especially when the conversation with a client is somewhat confrontational or stressful. However, feedback is the way in which we learn. If we aren't receiving it, we aren't growing. And sucking it up and taking the hit will go a long way if you're able to process that feedback effectively. Use it to your advantage. Learn from mistakes and then move on! You are on to the next chapter and it's a good thing to have these types of experiences under your belt.

Not only for environmental consulting, but for every human interaction is important to employ a good emotional intelligence, as it will promote oxytocin that will increase the chance of developing trust-based relationships, reduce conflict, and better alignment of expectations between stakeholders.