Your client is resistant to your coaching insights. How can you navigate their feelings of threat?

When a client resists my coaching insights, I handle it with care. I once worked with someone who was initially threatened by my suggestions. To address this, I made sure to listen carefully to their concerns and acknowledge their feelings without pushing back. Instead of presenting my insights as absolute solutions, I framed them as collaborative ideas that could help achieve their goals. By keeping the conversation open and adapting based on their feedback, I was able to build trust and make the client feel more comfortable with the process. This approach turned their resistance into cooperation, helping them see the value in my insights and move forward more effectively.

In my experience as a mentor, I have found demonstrating an understanding to the resistance, and how change can be challenging, can provide the client with a feeling of support to push through the barriers. Exploring alternative options and strategies to better suit the client allows choice for the client which encourages motivation. Encourage breaking down the task into manageable chunks and working through each together. Celebrating each milestone reached and reflect on each step to see if adjustments may be needed.

Widerst?nde sind zun?chst einmal Meinungspositionen, die auf bestimmten Erfahrungen und Beurteilungen beruhen. Dazu geh?rt, dass Menschen, die eine Meinung fest vertreten, tendenziell gerne daran auch festhalten. Also: Sprich mit der Person über ihre Erfahrungen und frage sie, warum sie diese so bewertet. Zeig der Person, dass sie erst einmal von dir akzeptiert und verstanden wird. Ist diese Verbindung positiv hergestellt, kann man die harten Grenzen langsam aufweichen.

As coaches, it is our responsibility to recognize that resistance can be a sign of other symptoms. We need to treat it with compassion and with open minds, acknowledging all the traumas and rejection of ideas that individuals may have experienced throughout their lives. We should respond with respect and compassion and give them time. If this does not lower their defenses, we should continue to give them time.

My client has blind spots. It's why she hired me as her coach to help her overcome where she is feeling stuck. It may be obvious to me what she needs, but chances are others have pointed the blind spots out to her before so her first reaction is defensiveness. By taking the time to build rapport and trust, she knows that I support her and she is not threatened by my questioning. Blind spots are the result of hurt, misunderstanding, or trauma, and the vows and judgments we make as a result of our pain. Establishing trust is essential so we can work together to resolve her current issues and give her strategies to see clearly what holds her back in the future.

Trust is the essential foundation in every mentoring / coaching relationship. Most mentees / clients seek guidance in the hope of achieving success, but fear being judged for their failure. Just admitting they need a coach is a barrier for many failing / flailing entrepreneurs. A positive coaching strategy is to establish trust first, and then "sandwich" suggestions / corrections between two layers of compliments. Once momentum is established it becomes much easier to encourage and facilitate movement toward the client's goals.

Es kann helfen, die Person einzuladen sich dieselbe Geschichte/Situation/Position aus einer anderen Perspektive zu erz?hlen. Vielleicht durch andere Beteiligte, die eine andere Historie, einen anderen Erfahrungsschatz und andere Bewertungskriterien zugrunde legen. Geben Sie Ihrem Gespr?chspartner die Aufgabe, diese Perspektive selbst zu deuten, anstatt sie ihr zu erkl?ren. Meistens sind Menschen n?mlich empathisch genug, um sich in die Perspektive anderer hineinzuversetzen. Die Erkenntnisse kommen dann fast ganz von selbst. Zudem werden innere Konflikte oder Dilemmata transparent, an denen dann weiter gearbeitet werden kann.

We all struggle with being told what to do. My coaching client may say she wants me to tell her what she should be doing until it hits a nerve and there is resistance. Rather than giving insights that sound like a directive, I focus on repeating to them their values and goals that we have previously discussed and going over the possible options. The decision is up to her. By helping her work through the pros and cons of each option, she is able to draw her own conclusions even if the decision she comes to is uncomfortable. Then, I offer support and encouragement for her to take the necessary steps forward.

Meiner Erfahrung nach sprechen sehr viele Menschen über das Verhalten anderer, deren Fehler und Verantwortung ohne sich selbst zu sehen. Es ist auch Aufgabe eines Coaches den Spiegel immer wieder hochzuhalten und die Person zu bitten, zu schildern, welchen eigenen Anteil sie an einer Situation hat. Es hilft auch den Personen klar zu machen, dass sie selbst diejenigen sind, die einer Situation eine Bedeutung geben und sie eine Wahl hatten und auch heute noch haben, wie sie eine Situation bewerten. Und mit ver?nderter Bewertung ?ffnen sich neue Türen und es zeigen sich neue andere L?sungsm?glichkeiten.

Encouraging your clients to take responsibility and ownership for all of their actions is absolutely crucial. This alone can bring a wealth of awareness that will undeniably propel their growth.

Encouraging your client to take ownership of their growth process can reduce feelings of threat. Empower them to make choices and contribute to the development of their action plans. In my nutrition advocacy work, I once had a client resistant to changing their eating habits. Instead of dictating a plan, I invited them to participate in creating their action plan. We discussed various options, and they chose small, manageable changes they felt comfortable with. This approach fostered a sense of autonomy and reinforced their capability to effect change. As they took ownership of their growth, they became more open to my insights and less defensive.

Support is absolutely essential to your coaching practice. It's the primary reason our clients seek our services and compensate us. We play a pivotal role in guiding our clients as they explore new paths and ventures, and we provide unwavering support in various forms and tools. Our goal is to empower them to embrace their new self and identity by making it easier for them to push through challenges and embrace their potential.

As coaches, we can forget that we are ahead of our clients in experience and training. What am asking her to do is foreign territory to her. The challenge for me, as the coach, is to meet her where she is in her journey and be patient with her progress. She does not have the perspective that I do and she is working through something she has not done before. Find the balance between walking by her side and challenging her to reach beyond her comfort zone.