You want to tell your boss they’re doing something wrong. How do you avoid coming off as disrespectful?

2 Focus on the facts and the impact

When you give feedback to your boss, you want to avoid making assumptions, judgments, or accusations. You don't want to sound like you are blaming them, questioning their competence, or undermining their credibility. Instead, you want to present the facts and the impact of their actions or decisions, using specific examples and data. You can also use the SBI model (Situation, Behavior, Impact) to structure your feedback. This way, you show respect for their perspective and experience, and help them understand the consequences of their behavior.

3 Use a positive and supportive tone

How you say something is as important as what you say when you give feedback to your boss. You don't want to use harsh, sarcastic, or aggressive language, or raise your voice or roll your eyes. You don't want to sound like you are lecturing them, complaining about them, or challenging them. Instead, you want to use a positive and supportive tone , expressing appreciation, empathy, and curiosity. You can also use the sandwich method (positive-negative-positive) to balance your feedback. This way, you show respect for their feelings and motivations, and build rapport and trust.

4 Offer solutions and suggestions

When you give feedback to your boss, you don't want to leave them hanging, wondering what to do next. You don't want to sound like you are dumping problems on them, criticizing them without reason, or imposing your views on them. Instead, you want to offer solutions and suggestions, based on your expertise, experience, or research. You can also use the feedback loop (ask for feedback, give feedback, agree on actions) to involve them in the process. This way, you show respect for their role and responsibility, and demonstrate your value and contribution.

5 Follow up and appreciate

Giving feedback to your boss is not a one-time event, but an ongoing process. You don't want to forget about it, ignore it, or avoid it. You don't want to sound like you are nagging them, monitoring them, or expecting them to change overnight. Instead, you want to follow up and appreciate, checking in on their progress, offering support and resources, and acknowledging their efforts and achievements. You can also ask for feedback on your feedback , and learn from their feedback. This way, you show respect for their growth and development, and foster a culture of feedback and learning.