Feedback is essential for improving team performance and collaboration, but it can also trigger defensiveness in some people. Defensiveness is a natural reaction to perceived criticism or threat, but it can hinder learning, communication, and trust. How can you recognize the nonverbal cues of defensiveness in a team feedback session, and what can you do to overcome them?
Defensiveness is a form of self-protection that involves denying, rejecting, or avoiding feedback. It can stem from various factors, such as low self-esteem, fear of failure, lack of trust, or personal values. Defensiveness can affect not only the person who receives the feedback, but also the person who gives it and the rest of the team. It can create tension, resentment, misunderstanding, and conflict, which can reduce team morale, productivity, and creativity.
If you're playing defence, you assume someone else is playing offence, meaning that you feel they're trying to beat you. When you get defensive, you tend to stop listening, create tension or problems where it doesn't exist, and generally lose interest. All of these things create larger, long-lasting issues. If you approach these scenarios from a place of positive intent, your mindset will shift and hopefully open up a few doors you would have otherwise never even checked were open.
Nonverbal cues of defensiveness in a team feedback session may include crossed arms, tense body language, defensive gestures (e.g., finger-pointing), avoiding eye contact, fidgeting, a defensive posture (leaning back), facial expressions like frowning or scowling, and interrupting others. These signals suggest resistance to feedback and a protective stance. Recognizing and addressing these cues is crucial for fostering open communication and constructive feedback within the team.
Some common cues: Body Language Crossed Arms: This is a classic sign of defensiveness, indicating a barrier between the individual & the feedback. Leaning Back: When someone leans back, it can signify withdrawal or resistance. Avoiding Eye Contact: Lack of eye contact can suggest discomfort or unwillingness to engage with the feedback. Tense Posture: Rigid or stiff body posture often indicates tension & defensiveness. Closed Fists: This can show the person feeling threatened or angry. Facial Expressions Frowning or Scowling: Negative facial expressions often indicate displeasure or disagreement. Tightened Jaw: Clenching the jaw is a common sign of stress or anger. Pursed Lips: This can indicate withholding comments or disagreement.
One thing I've found helpful over the years is getting to know each member of your team well. It is very important to creat a one on one relationship with each team member,study their body language in different situations i.e when happy, excited, angry, etc. Doing so will help you figure out in an instant if any of your team member is uncomfortable and defensive even without saying a word. Knowing them well will also enable you know the best approach to take while talking to each team member. Creating an opened environment and putting up yourself first for any correction from your team is a good way to start. Remember to always practice supportive supervision.
Crossed arms, avoiding eye contact, fidgeting, and a tense posture are all nonverbal cues of defensiveness during a team feedback session. This issue, being defensiveness, is of importance because it prevents open communication, hinders constructive feedback from being received effectively, and can render a hostile environment. Acknowledging these cues allows for discussing concerns empathetically, and fostering a culture of trust and growth in a team. Getting to know and mitigating defensiveness is key to having productive feedback sessions.
Defensiveness can be expressed through various nonverbal cues such as crossing arms or legs, frowning, rolling eyes, sighing, clenching fists or jaw, leaning back or turning away, nodding excessively, or interrupting. These behaviors could indicate that the person is not open to feedback and may feel attacked, offended, or misunderstood. Understanding these signs can help you better assess the situation and take appropriate action.
Spotting defensiveness, especially in the hybrid work environment can be a challenge. Being able to observe body language and put it together with context is important. Listen for changes in the tone of voice, especially in response to what others are saying. Look for physical withdrawals as identified. If you are dealing with a multicultural team, it can be easy to misinterpret cues so be careful-avoiding eye contact is seen as a sign of respect for some. Folding arms may mean that someone is cold. Listen to the totality of communication (what is said) along with what is done to make sure you're on the right track.
Tension is the biggest sign when someone is against a discussion point. Maybe it's in their knuckles, their back, or their jaw, but it's there. People who are also defensive tend to fidget as if they're trying to get a quick word in on a topic they may be against. The typical "teenage cue" is crossing arms or rolling eyes and it's a sign that they don't care or don't want to listen. One other cue of defensiveness can be non-verbal but environment interaction such as slamming a pen down on a table or pushing a chair back from a table. Defensive people tend to be on edge and will respond quicker than they can think.
When a person is trying to defend himself or deflect assumptions about certain decisions they tend to slightly tilt their head to the left. Our brain has two spheres. A right one, used for analytical purposes, like solving math problems or critical thinking to find the root cause for problems. The left one is used for creativity, like drawing or painting, sculpting clay, or writing a story. When someone is tilting their head they are actually creating a story to throw people off track leading them away from themselves. Essentially they are lying.
El lenguaje no verbal es fundamental para detectar una forma de defensa pasiva. La mirada , la rigidez en el cuerpo , la falta de atención son formas de mostrar desinterés. Es importante que todos se sientan relajados, cómodos y escuchados a fin de lograr un lugar de retroalimentación y aprendizaje. El ambiente tenso elimina la posibilidad de un diálogo constructivo y la alineación hacia objetivos comunes.
A tentativa de se justificar o tempo todo, durante o feedback, também é um sinal de uma postura em defensiva. Quando n?o aceitamos o que nos está sendo dito, nos justificamos. Por vezes atribuindo a responsabilidade do ocorrido para o outro, culpabilizando o externo pelo que nos acontece. é realmente doloroso ouvir o que temos para melhorar e quando n?o nos conhecemos verdadeiramente, torna-se ainda mais desafiador receber feedbacks para desenvolvimento.
If you notice these cues in yourself or others, you can try some strategies to reduce defensiveness and foster a more constructive feedback culture. Expressing empathy and appreciation can help build rapport and trust, while using "I" statements and avoiding blaming or accusing can prevent defensiveness and hostility. Asking open-ended questions and listening actively encourages dialogue and understanding, while focusing on facts and behaviors, not personality or character, avoids personal attacks and judgments. Providing specific and balanced feedback can highlight strengths and areas for improvement. By applying these strategies, you can make feedback more effective and positive, thus enhancing team communication and collaboration.
Set the right tone: Emphasize learning and growth over fault-finding. Focus on behaviour, not personality: Frame feedback as observations of actions, not attacks on character. Use "I" statements Actively listen
We started this practice at work when we ask if they are open to feedback before we give it. Often times, we’re giving feedback when the employee is not in the mental state to receive it and learn from it. Be proactive and allow criticism and feedback to be objective, not subjective. Instead of saying “I didn’t like your music playlist because it had inappropriate songs,” say, “Your music playlist had songs with obscene words and lyrics.” That’ll help build trust and allow for future feedback. The feedback is simply to make them better at their job. It’s not an attack on them as a person, and you need to make sure they feel that way with your feedback.
To diffuse defensiveness, it's essential to use 'what' and 'how' questions instead of 'why' questions. In team feedback sessions, the way we frame our questions can significantly impact the response we receive. 'What' and 'how' questions are less accusatory and more constructive, encouraging open dialogue and problem-solving. For example, asking "What steps can we take to improve this process?" or "How can we support you better?" focuses on solutions and collaboration, making team members feel valued and understood rather than blamed.
I like to clearly state that there will be no blame assigned for issues and want to focus on facts. What happened, what was the cause, and how do we address it. The key is to make sure no one on the team is blamed for a mistake during or after a discussion.
Para evitar que a pessoa fique na defensiva durante o feedback é necessário que sejam trazidos pontos pautados em números e que os mesmos sejam apresentados durante a sess?o de retorno. N?o pode haver achismos por parte de quem aplica o feedback. Devem ser demosntrados fatos e diante deles usar argumenta??es que n?o deixem margem para dúvidas ou interpreta??es. Além disso, diante das justificativas que indicam que o colaborador esteja na defensiva, pode ser pedido para que ele apresente durante a conversa exemplos das atitudes que ele teve que comprovam as desculpas que ele esteja dando. Se os números que forem apresentados estiverem bem explicados, n?o terá o que se argumentar e isso irá quebrar a postura defensiva do funcionário.
Sometimes, despite your best efforts, you may encounter defensiveness in a team feedback session. To respond to defensiveness and diffuse the situation, it’s important to acknowledge the person's feelings and perspective, which can show respect and validation. Reframing the feedback as an opportunity for growth and learning can also shift the mindset from threat to challenge. Additionally, seeking clarification and feedback on your feedback can invite feedback and feedback. Offering support and resources can demonstrate your commitment and willingness to help, while following up and following through can show your consistency and accountability. By using these techniques, you can handle defensiveness in a professional and respectful way, while maintaining a positive team relationship.
Listen. Intently. If you notice there's a shift in the room towards the defensive, take clear notes of everything being said and listen. Don't listen to respond; listen to understand. If you're responsible for the meeting and the team, it's up to you to diffuse the situation and make sure everyone's points are brought up in a valid, constructive way. We don't have to like the outcome, but we can get there without feeling attacked.
Say "I understand how you feel" or "I understand where you are coming from" Then explain to them why you are saying this and why it is for everyone's benefit. Put them in your shoes by asking, "I understand. But how will you say if you were me?" It will lower their defensiveness when they begin to see things from your perspective. Most importantly, don't brush them off. Let them finish what they want to say.
Acknowledge their feelings Reframe the situation Ask clarifying questions: Seek deeper understanding before jumping to conclusions. Suggest alternative perspectives: Offer different ways to interpret the situation.
The only way to handle defensiveness is to always act as an example. In other words, the first step is always to respond with active listening and empathy to determine the underlying reasons for the insight. Unfortunately, there is no universal fit for every situation; doubtless, the outcomes always depend on the willingness to change the different parts of the equation. These behaviours are always rooted in more complex problems (for instance, low self-esteem or lack of empathy) that must be addressed to improve the situation in the latter extremes.
Acknowledging and respecting individuals is critical and necessary. All parties need to feel valued and respected and also listened to. If this is not felt by anyone of the parties then the situation will endure hard long drawn out negotiations
Feedback is a skill that can be learned and improved with practice. To enhance your feedback skills, you should seek feedback regularly and proactively, give feedback frequently and respectfully, reflect on feedback and apply it, and review feedback and measure progress. Doing so can help you develop a growth mindset, hone your feedback-giving style, learn from feedback, evaluate feedback, and celebrate your feedback-related achievements. Ultimately, this practice will help boost your team communication and performance, as well as foster a feedback-rich environment.
Role-playing feedback scenarios and using self-reflection tools can help you hone your communication skills and build a more open and receptive team environment.
When providing feedback to a team member exhibiting nonverbal cues of defensiveness, it's essential to approach the conversation with empathy and understanding. Begin by acknowledging their feelings and ensuring a safe and non-threatening environment. Use open-ended questions to encourage them to express their perspective and concerns. Stay calm, maintaining a neutral tone and avoiding accusatory language. Focus on specific behaviors or situations rather than making generalized statements. Offer constructive feedback with specific examples and suggest collaborative solutions. Pausing to allow them time to process and respond helps in diffusing defensiveness, fostering a more open and receptive atmosphere for productive feedback exchange.
Conversas difíceis ser?o, quase sempre, desafiadoras. Notícia boa: s?o os desafios que nos possibilitam crescer, nos desenvolver e nos aprimorar! Sendo assim, a assertividade em dar/receber feedbacks será alcan?ada na medida em que praticarmos, em que nos desafiarmos a praticar. Além disso, uma boa dose de autoconhecimento é indispensável, afinal só podemos oferecer ao outro o que temos dentro de nós!
Open dialogue with an understanding that you may have an individual that has great knowledge and experience and unfortunately they don’t have great skills in communication
Always be open to feedback and showing that openness to your team, regardless if was during your periodic meetings or keeping your office door 'open', or open to having a Teams call at any time. You want to encourage communication, regardless of priority. They will eventually learn what's important.
There are non-verbal cues that show defensiveness in a team feedback session and we should take care of that as teammates. There are moments when someone is showing defensiveness in feedback meeting because he/she could be struggling to maintain the deadlines and feedback to improve at that moment could led to additional delay. Further , Sometime , Some feedback is given considering the short term goals without looking for long term prospective which also led to Defensive Acts. Some Non-verbal cues would be , 1) Putting the Feedback in Doubt 2) Asking the Teammates to review again the Feedbacks Given 3) Try to Denies the Feedbacks 4) Suggesting Deadlines when Feedback is given 5) Making Exhausted Facial Expressions
??Body Language: Crossed arms or legs indicate defensiveness. ??Facial Expressions: Defensive team members may display tense facial muscles, narrowed eyes, or frowns. ??Tone of Voice: Defensive individuals often use a defensive or confrontational tone. ??Interrupting: Frequently interrupting others suggests a defensive stance. ??Minimal Acknowledgment: Lack of nodding or acknowledgment may signify resistance to feedback. ??Avoidance of Eye Contact: Not maintaining eye contact indicates discomfort or defensiveness. ??Justifying or Excusing: Excessive justifications or excuses reveal a defensive mindset. ??Closed Posture: Turning away or creating physical barriers suggests defensiveness.
Para atingir os objetivos do feedback é preciso compreender o que é essa poderosa ferramenta de gest?o e saber quando usa-la. Feedback n?o é apenas para apontar falhas mas também para reconhecimento. Tampouco é para ser feito apenas ao término de um projeto ou no fechamento de um ciclo. Uma vez presenciei uma frase de um gestor que disse para um funcionário que se o mesmo n?o melhorasse uma determinada competência, que o gestor iria aplicar um feedback no colaborador. Essa pessoa disse isso por ver o feedback como uma puni??o. Pensamentos assim fazem as pessoas ficarem na defensiva e n?o gostarem desse momento. Precisamos entender o que é um feedback para fazer bem feito e gerar crescimento para o funcionário ao invés de medo.
Consider implementing a feedback culture within the team, where sharing insights and receiving input is a norm. Foster an atmosphere where feedback is seen as a tool for enhancement rather than criticism. Regularly reassess and adapt feedback processes to align with the evolving dynamics of the team.
Non-verbal cues of a defensive attitude during a team feedback session may include: Facial Expressions: Forehead or nose wrinkles. Furrowed brows. Avoidant or fleeting eye contact. Grimaces or negative mouth movements. Body Language: Crossed arms, a protective gesture. Physical withdrawal, distancing from the group. Muscle tension, such as tense shoulders. Leaning the body backward, a signal of rejection. Gestures: Rejection gestures, like pushing away with the hand. Frequent touching of the face, a sign of nervousness. Restless object manipulation...