What do you do if your confidence takes a hit after a failure?

When confidence takes a hit after a failure, it's essential to acknowledge and validate the accompanying emotions and feelings. As a coach, one must create a safe space for clients to express their emotions without judgment or self-criticism. Encourage clients to recognize and accept their feelings of disappointment, frustration, or self-doubt as natural responses to setbacks. Help them expand their emotional vocabulary to enable them to embrace & express emotions fully. 'Wheel of Emotions' is a great tool for this. By acknowledging their emotions, clients can begin the process of understanding and addressing the underlying causes of their confidence slump.

Don't give up! It's easy after a knockback to talk yourself out of continuing! The brain is hardwired to look for negatives and keep us safe. But it can do that too well. Every failure or knockback is a chance to learn and do something different, sometimes it's the wrong moment but next time could well be the right one! There are lots of books about visualising success, I'd recommend the success principles by Jack Cranfield! Give it a go! I know I have!

The first thing to do first is to acknowledge and see it as it is, a learning curve and a stepping stone to success. Success isn't one big step, it's like a LADDER, made up of very small steps and those steps are failure. The light bulb during invention couldn't light up for 2774 times imagine that. Failing 2774 times to get right 1 last time. That's how life and success is you have to learn and reflect on that mistake and grow from it.

It’s important to know how to be confident again after you’ve failed. Because failing is a normal part of living and succeeding in life. Not only is the road to success paved with failure, but it’s how you learn best. And you can choose to react in one of two ways: (1) get stuck feeling sorry for yourself (which leads to a loss in self-confidence and self-esteem), or (2) find the lessons to be learned and use that to fuel you forward (boosting your self-confidence levels and making it more likely that you’ll ultimately succeed). There’s a secret ingredient that highly successful people have that others don’t. The secret ingredient is their mindset – they have a growth-oriented mentality that embraces failing forward.

I've been there more times than I can count. For starters, I reassess my objective. Was I prepared for what I was trying to accomplish or was I halfheartedly putting in effort? Every outcome is a reflection of our preparedness or lack thereof. Therefore, look bad on each meeting: What did I do right? How could I have done better? How can I repeat what works for the best outcome each time? Never stop learning.

Help clients reframe their perception of failure as an opportunity for growth and learning rather than a reflection of their abilities or worth. Encourage them to view setbacks as valuable feedback that can inform future actions and decisions. Support clients in identifying the lessons learned from the experience and the strengths they demonstrated in handling the challenge. This helps them regain confidence and foster resilience in the face of adversity.

If your confidence takes a hit after a failure, it's important to be kind to yourself and remember that setbacks are a natural part of growth. Take a moment to acknowledge your feelings, but don't let them define you! Everyone has setbacks on their journey. Reflect on what happened and focus on what you can learn from the experience to improve in the future. It's also important to practice self-care to recharge your energy and mindset so that you don't end up in too long of a slump. Try setting small, achievable goals to help you regain your footing and momentum.

I have completely reframed failure as I no longer wanted to see it as a negative, instead I see "failure" as a time when things didn't go the way I had planned and an opportunity for me to learn. It is through these moments I can grow and try something else. I see true failure as me giving up on myself rather than things just not working out how I wanted them to. I really encourage you to decide how you want to see failure and remind yourself of this regularly so it becomes your automatic perspective.

Failure is an opportunity for growth. By breaking down big goals into smaller, manageable steps, individuals can build momentum, gain confidence, and gradually move towards success. Each tiny step taken daily contributes to progress and eventual achievement.

If you failed, you need some success to build confidence and believer in yourself. Thing about your goals. The bread them down into smaller steps. Keep breaking them down until you reach tiny step that it is practically impossible to fail to do. Set this as your next day objective. Make sure you succeed the next day. And then keep going. Step by step, tiny progress will lead you to rebuilding your power and motivation and to building your success.

To regain confidence after a setback, I focus on setting and achieving small, manageable goals. These goals are specific, measurable, and time-bound, creating a clear pathway to success. Each small victory not only boosts my confidence but also reinforces my belief in my capabilities, setting the stage for tackling larger challenges. This approach has proven effective in maintaining momentum and building resilience.

When your confidence has been knocked it's a good idea to build it back up on small ways. A great way to do this is to consider all the small steps out of your comfort zone you could take, start really small, encouraging, celebrating and rewarding yourself along the way.

Encourage clients to reach out for support from trusted friends, family members, or mentors during challenging times. As a coach, provide a supportive and encouraging presence, offering empathy, active listening, and constructive feedback. Your authentic presence can be a great gift here. Help clients communicate their needs effectively. Empower them to cope with feelings of inadequacy or self-doubt when they are labelling themselves or being overly self-critical. One failure (even if they want to call it so) cannot and must not become their identity. By seeking support, clients can gain perspective, reassurance, and a roadmap to navigate through their confidence crisis with resilience and strength.

Support is super important to morale when accomplishing goals. It is important to have someone who can be encouraging, and another great thing is to also be that for yourself. So often we lend our support to our friends without question and we don't lend it to ourselves. Changing our self-talk can greatly aid in that, seeing it to yourself in the same invigorating manner you would say it to a friend, repeating it, filming it and playing it back to yourself or telling it to yourself in the mirror can get you in the mindset of believing in you.

Sharing can be incredibly helpful in moments when you feel alone, chances are someone will have experienced very similar feelings. Support from a coach can also be helpful to build back up your confidence and give some accountability as you take steps out of your comfort zone.

There was a time when my self-judgment significantly affected my self-esteem. However, as I continue to heal from my childhood trauma, I’ve learned the power of being kind and compassionate with myself. I’ve discovered that self-compassion not only boosts my self-esteem but also empowers me to step out of my comfort zone and take risks, even after experiencing failure. Practicing self-compassion has also strengthened my confidence and resilience during challenging times. Now, I see failure as more of a signpost and feedback for growth, elevation, and learning; it shows me what doesn’t work and guides me towards my goals.

Lean into the compassionate part of you and recognise that failure is part of life. Think about a baby who is learning to walk, they will fall down multiple times, yet everyone around them will continue to encourage them. This encouragement is what I want you to give to yourself when dealing with failure. Just as that baby had to fall down a few times to learnt to walk, you may have to fail a few times to achieve the success you desire.

Visualization is a powerful tool I use to enhance performance and self-belief. I strengthen my motivation and confidence by imagining myself successfully navigating challenges and achieving goals. This practice not only cultivates a positive self-image but also shifts focus from past setbacks to future opportunities, reinforcing my ability to succeed. Regular visualization has been a key strategy in my personal and professional growth.

One thing I found to be helpful is to change the view or understanding of mistakes and to formulate them into positive attributes. Mistakes are a key fundamental baseline to learning throughout your entire life. If you are not making mistakes and learning from them, it is time to retire. :)

Visualization is incredibly powerful in helping us achieve our dreams. When we visualize our goals, our brain actually interprets them as real experiences, which can positively influence our thoughts, behaviors, and emotions. One of the key hormones linked to visualization is dopamine. When we vividly imagine achieving our goals, our brain releases dopamine, the feel-good neurotransmitter. This not only makes us feel happier but also motivates us to take action to turn our visions into reality. Additionally, visualization can reduce cortisol levels, the stress hormone. By picturing ourselves succeeding, we lower our stress levels, which helps us stay focused, motivated, and resilient, even in the face of challenges.

In order to apply the right coaching tool here, as there are many, I find it very important to first find out what type the client is within Human Design, because we are all different in our behavior & response. Based on this fact, I can use different exercises to restore self-confidence depending on the type.

Reflect on your strengths and past successes. Remind yourself of the challenges you've overcome and the goals you've achieved. Focus on your strengths and capabilities, and use them as a foundation to rebuild your confidence. Practice self-compassion and kindness towards yourself, recognizing that failure is a natural part of growth and learning. Set small, achievable goals to regain your confidence gradually, and celebrate your progress along the way.