What do you do if your career goals and values don't align with your mentor's?

Here are some tips: 1) Have an open and honest conversation with your mentor. Share your thoughts, goals. Express that while you respect their perspective, you have your own aspirations that may differ. 2) Even if your goals and values differ, there may be areas of overlap. Identify these and leverage them to continue benefiting from your mentor's guidance. 3) Take some time to reflect on your own values/ goals. Clarifying this for yourself can help you navigate conflicts more effectively. 4) Be open to learning from your mentor's experiences, even if you ultimately choose a different path. 5) Remember that career paths are rarely linear. Stay true to yourself and pursue a path that aligns with who you are/or what you want to achieve.

DIFFERENCES ARE GOOD TO ALIGN BUT ALWAYS BE TRUE TO YOURSELF. To ALIGN with your MENTOR in finding differences, you need to Value each other as each one brings in a unique set of experiences, skills, and insights that can lead to clarity and better outcomes. *It is challenging but ultimately enriching experience. *Challenge your assumptions and beliefs, leading to clarity. * Understand your own priorities to help you better articulate them to your mentor. * Your mentor may offer different perspectives and insights. * By embracing differences and valuing the unique perspectives and strengths that each individual brings, you can achieve greater success together. * Being open to adjustment based on new insights and experiences helps.

When your career goals and values diverge from those of your mentors, how do you proceed? Consider the 3 S's: Significance, Substance, and Separation. Is the lack of alignment significant enough to cause confusion and misunderstanding? Does the misalignment hold enough substance that the guidance you receive could lead you astray? Will the misalignment act as a separating force, potentially causing trust and credibility issues due to differing values?"

To be fair, that conversation should happen at the onset of every mentoring relationship. When a mentor connects with a mentee, it is imperative that both put cards on the table about a variety of items, including values, goals, needs, and challenges. Once this occurs, conversations about differences can start to happen and perspective can be applied to input being given by both sides of the table. Values are highly personal and very difficult to change, so best to discuss first to make sure that the relationship can be truly beneficial in the long run.

What do you do if your career goals and values don't align with your mentor's? Differences with your mentor's career goals don't have to be a deal breaker. Issues arise when the difference is in your values. Here's a few tips for identifying your differences: 1. Have an honest conversation. Talk through the goals you would like to achieve and listen carefully to their responses. 2. Recognize that while your goals may differ, the alternative perspective may provide a unique view on your situation. It never hurts to have someone play devils advocate. 3. If the differences is in your values, you may need to seek a new mentor. Values are very core to the individual and can be incredibly difficult to reconcile.

Differences add diversity to the fold and certainly enrich one’s perspectives by keeping these 2 pointers in mind. 1. PARADIGMS MATTER The environment THEN where the mentor operates, is different from yours, NOW. Compare the contributing factor(s) for the Mentor’s success to the potential factors you are faced with. Discuss openly about the validity of each paradigm-sensitive factors while exploring possible outcomes together. Push for healthy debates :) 2. THE RIGHT TO DECIDE ‘Projection of self’ can occur when mentors become too eager to help by unconsciously steering the mentees to live out the Mentor’s values instead. Demonstrate respect by acknowledging their input and politely buy time for the final decision. Enjoy the chat!

When we detected a difference, we often don't understand or can't elaborate what the difference actually is and why it trigger us. When we don't understand, we may jump into judgment. Acting from a place of judgment often results in breaking or weakening trust. That's one way relationships break. Observe if that process is happening inside of you. If so, transform that judgment into curiosity by listenning to understand. Ask questions such as: I felt this value is very important to you. Is that so? Tell me more about that. Good management of differences and disagreements may actually lead to both personal and professional growth.

A mentor with misaligned values is like a compass pointing north when you need to go south. An open conversation is key! Explain your goals and values honestly, and ask about theirs. Listen actively, and see if there's common ground. Remember, a mentor doesn't have to agree with everything, but they should support your journey! Bonus Tip: Don't be afraid to expand your network! Having multiple mentors with diverse perspectives can give you a well-rounded view and the support you need to reach your goals.

It is normal to have differences between you and your mentor. However, it is essential to communicate openly about these differences and not to hide them as ignoring differences may lead to misunderstanding and misalignment. Coming closer to each other would result in a productive mentor/mentee relationship which will make it an effective mentoring exercise in which you as mentee would acquire effective business skills.

- Dialogue over Debate: Approach the conversation with your mentor as a dialogue, not a debate. The goal is to share perspectives, not to convince the other party to change their stance. - Specific Examples: Use specific examples to illustrate where advice given may not align with your goals. For example, if your mentor suggests a safe career path but you’re inclined towards startups, explain your passion for entrepreneurial environments. - Future Focus: Discuss how the mentorship can evolve. Ask for advice in areas where your goals do align and express how you value their expertise in those areas

Setting boundaries with you mentor is key to building a successful teacher-student relationship. It helps prevent misunderstandings when creating goals and evaluating your career path. Make sure that you: 1. Discuss what your values are and what you are willing to do to succeed. Everyone has a different take on career development and your mentor's will likely differ from yours. 2. Your stance on being a leader vs. being an employee. Not everyone wants to become an entrepreneur. Make sure you set clear expectations on what your ideal development path would be. 3. Set expectations on your communication schedule. Are you the kind of person that need immediate feedback? Set a schedule with your mentor and respect each other's preferences.

:= Establish clear boundaries with your mentor to protect your autonomy and well-being. := Define topics, frequency, and duration of meetings or communication. := Communicate your preferences for feedback, advice, and support to ensure a productive relationship

Establecer límites claros en una relación de mentoría es esencial para proteger la autonomía y el bienestar, evitando conflictos y confusiones. Sin embargo, es importante mantener la flexibilidad y la disposición para ajustar estos límites según sea necesario, promoviendo una comunicación abierta y una colaboración efectiva en la relación.

It is important to set boundaries in your mentoring activities, which may apply to timing of sessions, topics being discussed and sticking to your own business and personal values. If you shy away from setting the necessary boundaries, you will be the first one to suffer from undesired processes and outcomes. Setting boundaries in a mentor-mentee relationship sets the ground for a healthy relationship that usually results in a win-win mentorship activity where both parties will have met their expectations.

- Clear Expectations: Define what you expect from the mentorship relationship and what areas you feel confident handling on your own. For instance, you might welcome their input on developing leadership skills but prefer to make your own choices about which industry you work in. - Navigating Advice: When receiving advice that doesn't align with your goals, acknowledge it with gratitude but also with firmness about your direction. This prevents miscommunication and sets a respectful tone for future interactions.

:= Embrace diversity in your career development to expand your perspectives and opportunities. := Engage with diverse networks, events, and resources to expose yourself to new ideas and experiences. := Seek out mentors and coaches from diverse backgrounds to gain insights and guidance from various viewpoints.

- Broader Perspectives: Expand your mentorship circle to include individuals with varying backgrounds and experiences. This can offer a more holistic approach to career development and may provide insights that one mentor cannot. - Industry-Specific Mentors: Look for mentors within the industry or niche you are passionate about. Their advice will likely be more aligned with your goals and the specific challenges you’ll face.

I think it's important to go through the steps first, of using open and honest communication, however, I think it's important to highlight that people shouldn't feel bad/guilty if the relationship is not working. It's common for people to have different points of view and different values but if that's making on party feel uncomfortable and it's getting in the way of progress there's nothing wrong in finding a new partnership. In fact it's more healthy sometimes to move on and experience a new way of working and a new point of view.

Mentoring is a two way street - sometimes the match does not work - however that does not mean you as a mentee cant gain from the mentor and vice versa. Easiest thing to do is to walk away but that would be a lost opportunity. Be curious of the choices of the mentor and what they learnt from it. also be open to share you point of view - till the time there is respect and open exchange of ideas this would be beneficial to both. Just because you are open to knowing more wont mean you will use the advise but you will gain from perspective taking and diversity of input.

??If your Mentor isn't taking the time to re-evaluate your career goals and values, there's a red flag. ??If your Mentor is curving your career goals and values to fit their end goal for you, that's a red flag. The top two are the basis of a mentor/mentee relationship. If you fall out of harmony with those expectations and alignment in values, it's time to have a conversation where they went out of alignment. If you feel guilt, or shame after the conversation and feel compelled to please the mentor by shifting your focuses back.. ??????Strike Three Thank them for their time and put a pause on your mentor relationship for now. It may fall back into alignment in the future, but you will both be souring the relationship to continue.

Sometimes we “outgrow” a relationship. It’s helpful to periodically assess mentors to see if they are still a good fit. If not, it may be time to move on.

- Mentorship Evolution: Reflect on how the relationship has grown and whether it still serves your professional development. Sometimes, a mentor is more suited to a particular phase in your career. - Amicable Transition: If the mentorship no longer serves your goals, transition the relationship gracefully. Express gratitude for their support and maintain the connection, but seek out new guidance that aligns better with your current path.

If there is an issue only with the skill requirements on which I am being mentored, I can communicate and check on additional support and still continue. If there is a clash of 'values' and definitely a mentor, a senior person, may not alter their values easily, give a try and look for a different mentor. Values are too important.

Perhaps consider the relationship through the coaching model GROW. Goal: reflect, discern, and articulate your goals. Perhaps your values have changed and new goals need to be defined. Reality: what is happening? How is the relationship serving you (or not?) Options: what can be shifted - connect with your mentor and redesign your alliance. What can work better? Be frank and open to feedback while staying true to your goals and needs. Brainstorm options, include changing your mentor. Always be appreciative. Will: what action will you take to cultivate the new way of being in the relationship? Or find a new mentor? Trust yourself and stay in your integrity in the process. You will definitely learn something in this process.

Usually, there are 3 options that you can consider in situations like that: accept, change, leave. Are you able to accept the status quo? Then stay. If not, can you change the situation? If you can change it, try to do it. There is always one last option: leave and seek better conditions elsewhere.

Assuming you want to keep the mentoring relationship going, focus on learning. Your mentor can still offer valuable guidance, support and knowledge.