How do you establish and maintain a productive relationship with your mentor or coach?

Mentor in Greek mythology was a teacher /guide not a shortcut to career success! Mentoring is a subject I addressed early on in the San Francisco Examiner Careers series and In The Secrets of Savvy Networking. I introduced mentoring by quoting Socrates “If my student does not surpass me, I have failed.” It’s a two pronged view: 1. From perspective of mentor 2. From that of mentee. Savvy networkers who have mentors must mentor others. Turn about is fair play! Times have changed and our mentors change with the times. We need different mentors for different expertise. In The Secrets of Savvy Networking I wrote we need “M.O.M.S.??” Mentors of MomentS! Susan RoAne, keynote speaker/author of The Secrets of Savvy Networking,HowToWorkaRoom

First and foremost, it's important to find a mentor or coach who aligns with your goals, values, and personality. This will ensure that you're both on the same page and can establish a rapport from the outset. Once you've found the right person, it's essential to set clear expectations and boundaries for the relationship. This means defining the scope of your interactions, establishing communication protocols, and outlining your goals and objectives.

One thing I have found useful is to do my research. If you are considering hiring a coach dive deep. Go beyond their website. Look at their presence in other social media platforms. How do they show up? If you are going to invest money in someone make sure they can deliver. Unfortunately we live in an era where we must be cautious and do our due diligence.

Effective communication is another key component of a successful mentor-mentee or coach-client relationship. Be open and honest about your strengths, weaknesses, and challenges, and be receptive to feedback and guidance. Regular check-ins and progress updates can also help ensure that you're on track and making meaningful progress toward your goals.

Mutual respect is also critical for a productive relationship with a mentor or coach. Respect their time, expertise, and perspective, and be willing to learn from them. Similarly, they should respect your goals, boundaries, and autonomy, and be willing to listen to your concerns and feedback.

Preparation, preparation, preparation! The key to asking relevant and thoughtful questions to your mentor is to prepare them thoroughly. 1. Before the session: craft 5-7 relevant and thoughtful questions. 2. During the session: take concise notes of the answers provided. 3. After the session: revisit both your questions and the responses. Then, use these as a foundation to formulate follow-up questions for your next interaction. This approach shows your mentor genuine interest and appreciation. It also helps you build a constructive and deep mentoring relationship.

Accepting that you need a mentor or coach is a very strong move. At this point you know your end game. Provided you're being straight forward with your mentor about your challenges, you should be able to identify when your goal is achieved. All the above and have fun. When you enjoy how you do and what you do, the right thing will fall into shape naturally.