How do you approach rebuilding trust with a donor after a misunderstanding jeopardizes the relationship?

LISTEN! It starts with your donor feeling like they've been heard. Truly heard. Without a clear understanding of what their concerns are, we cannot take the first steps to make it right. Start with a broad question - "I understand you are frustrated by something that has happened. Can you share with me your story?" From there, we can better acknowledge the error and move forward.

Saying sorry is not enough. You must be sure you fully grasp the misunderstanding and importantly, whether there is a fundamental dissonance between donor intent or expectations, and the organization’s mission and fundamental goals. Papering over such misalignments will only create more problems and risk potentially catastrophic results. If the problem lies with misalignment between leadership and the donor, the board must assess cost/benefit questions, once again with a focus on the fundamental mission. Legal counsel may also be needed, if there are questions about whether the donor’s expectations might jeopardize the organization’s non-profit status (for example, expectations that, if realized, might be construed as private inurement).

The first thing to do is personalize outreach and make a deep effort to connect. I have tried in the past to connect current events within the organization to the donor(s) to show them how their past support is still creating amazing opportunities and how we still rely on their input as we look to advance and grow.

Immediately reach out and prepare to listen. Correct any misinformation and outline in detail what happened and the corrective action you have/are taking to ensure the error never happens again. You must be open and not defensive. Let them know that you understand if they step back, but you are committed to rebuilding their trust and are committed to doing so. Set up a follow-up meeting/call in 6 months to follow up on your progress and to reconnect. You can repair most relationships, but it will take time. Also, remember to invite them to programs so they can see your org in action and meet the people you serve; make it personal. This strategy is all about reconnecting them to your outcomes.

Donors are like family to your cause - and ongoing engagement is a priority - regardless of their likelihood to give again in future. In fact, existing donors need another relationship level than prospective donors. Here are my thoughts on effective ongoing engagement. It's best done following the donor's contact preferences, including whether they're open to receiving face-to-face invites. Try to keep them updated on as regular a basis as they wish, sharing personalized, brief news and social media posts; and connect them to your cause's beneficiaries and fieldworkers. Ensure you fulfil any impact reporting and/or public recognition of their support - donors may have these as basic requirements. I'd love to hear others' views on this.