How can you use your mentee experience to guide your mentees?

Having been mentored, I've experienced firsthand the power of a mentor who truly understands. Effective leadership is never generic; it's meticulously tailored to individual needs. It's crucial to delve deep, grasping your mentee's aspirations, preferences, and unique traits. Through such understanding, a mentor can sculpt an approach that perfectly aligns with their mentee's learning curve. From my perspective, the essence of impactful mentorship lies in combining deep empathy with strategic adaptability. Let us champion a mentorship paradigm that's not just about guidance but about resonating deeply, unlocking untapped potential, and elevating those we mentor.

When I was a mentee, the 1st and foremost is to be able to know what you do not know and be as specific as possible, so that the mentor is able to help you. Secondly, you will want to share what is the learning outcome with a stipulated period so that the mentor is able to pace to what you want. With this input, the mentee is able to support the mentor to be your personal guiding compass and cheerleader to further refine what you want to learn. Hence, it will be a win-win for both mentee and mentor in achieving the desired outcome from the session.

This is a key, but for making it happen, mentees need to define their goals and share them with the mentor at the kickoff of the relationship. First time mentees in mentoring programs that are not well defined, are not aware that mentoring start with them, through their introspection about which ones are their goals and why do they want to have a mentor

Who are you mentoring, and who is mentoring you? Those are the questions I continuously ask myself. Just because you have attained success or significant accomplishments does not mean you no longer need mentorship. Recently, there was a call for mentors for the National Capital Healthcare Executives mentorship program. Although I was selected as a mentor, I first signed up as a mentee. The aim was two-fold. First, one can always learn more from the knowledge, skills, experience, and attributes of others. Secondly, it models to our mentees that you seek to grow and improve continuously. For me, the road to success is always under construction. I hope my mentees value the same approach to their personal growth and development.

Sharing your story is a great way of building trust with your mentees. It builds a safe space where the mentees feel encouraged to share as well. Also when you share your stories which may be your mentee experience or something that you want them to know from your experience, the mentees feel connected and valued.

During my mentorship with a Navy serviceman, I learned the profound value of structured feedback. Every insight, rooted in naval discipline, guided me like a navigational chart. Positive feedback reinforced my strengths, while constructive criticism illuminated areas for growth. I didn’t passively wait for feedback; I actively sought it, especially in uncertain times. These experiences instilled in me a belief in feedback as a growth catalyst. As a leader, I prioritize a culture where feedback is vital, ensuring it's clear, timely, and actionable, fostering continuous learning and driving excellence.

As you reflect, think about not just the outcome but what were the effective strategies/frameworks/tools/mental models that enabled you to achieve these results. Write these down to build your own repertoire that you can then leverage to mentor others.

Even when you have have experience as a mentee with the same challenge your mentee is having right now, please consider that the solution for that particular challenge is more likely different from your solution. Every person is different und unique due to their experience, qualifications, culture etc. So what worked for you back then is not necessarily also working for your mentee. It can only help them to find their own solution easier when hearing about your experience.