How can you recognize different conflict resolution styles?

1 What are conflict resolution styles?

Conflict resolution styles are the patterns of behavior that people use when they face a disagreement, a problem, or a challenge with others. They reflect how people balance their own needs and interests with those of others, and how they express their emotions and opinions. There are many ways to categorize conflict resolution styles, but one of the most widely used models is the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI), which identifies five styles based on two dimensions: assertiveness and cooperativeness.

2 What are the five conflict resolution styles?

The TKI model identifies five conflict resolution styles: competing, accommodating, avoiding, compromising, and collaborating. Those who compete pursue their own goals and outcomes, often at the expense of others. Accommodators sacrifice their own needs and interests to satisfy those of others. Avoiders withdraw from the conflict physically or emotionally, not expressing their feelings or opinions. Compromisers seek a middle ground or mutual concession. Collaborators strive for a win-win solution where both parties achieve their goals and interests.

3 How can you recognize conflict resolution styles?

It can be difficult to determine someone's conflict resolution style, as people may vary their approach depending on the situation, the relationship, or the personality. But there are some clues that can help you recognize a conflict resolution style. Pay attention to the words and tone they use, such as if they use assertive or passive language and positive or negative words. Observe their body language and facial expressions, such as if they maintain eye contact or look away, and if they cross their arms or open their palms. Also consider their actions and behaviors, such as if they initiate or avoid the conversation, if they listen or interrupt, and if they cooperate or compete.

4 How can you adapt your conflict resolution style?

When it comes to conflict resolution, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Depending on the context, goal, and outcome, different styles have their own advantages and disadvantages. Therefore, it is important to be flexible and adaptable when choosing the style that works best for a given situation. Factors that can help you decide which style to use include the importance of the issue (minor or major, urgent or long-term, factual or emotional), the importance of the relationship (close or distant, personal or professional, cooperative or competitive), and the importance of the outcome (win-lose or win-win, zero-sum or positive-sum game, fixed or variable pie).

5 How can you improve your conflict resolution skills?

Improving your conflict resolution skills requires practice and feedback. To become better at resolving conflicts, it's important to be self-aware and understand your own style, strengths, weaknesses, and triggers. Additionally, it's important to be empathetic and try to understand the other person's perspective, feelings, and needs. Respect should be paramount; treat the other person with dignity and courtesy, avoid personal attacks, and focus on the issue. It's also valuable to be creative and look for opportunities to find common ground or generate new ideas. Finally, aim for a positive outcome that is mutually beneficial in order to maintain the relationship.

6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?