How can you help your mentee develop negotiation skills?

1 Assess their needs

Before you start coaching your mentee on negotiation skills, you need to understand their current level, goals, and challenges. You can use a self-assessment tool, such as the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI), to help your mentee identify their preferred style of handling conflict and how it affects their negotiation outcomes. You can also ask your mentee to share some examples of past or present situations where they had to negotiate and how they felt about them. This will help you tailor your advice and resources to their specific needs.

2 Teach them the basics

Once you have a clear picture of your mentee's needs, you can teach them the basic principles and techniques of effective negotiation. You can use the Harvard Negotiation Project's model of principled negotiation, which focuses on four elements: interests, options, criteria, and alternatives. You can explain how to identify and communicate one's own and the other party's interests, generate and evaluate multiple options, use objective criteria to reach a fair agreement, and prepare a best alternative to a negotiated agreement (BATNA) in case of impasse. You can also teach your mentee how to use active listening, empathy, assertiveness, and persuasion skills to build rapport and trust with the other party.

3 Give them feedback

As your mentee learns and applies the negotiation skills, you can give them constructive feedback to help them improve. You can use the SBI model, which stands for situation, behavior, and impact, to structure your feedback. You can describe the specific situation where your mentee used a negotiation skill, the behavior they exhibited, and the impact it had on the outcome. You can also use the STAR model, which stands for situation, task, action, and result, to help your mentee reflect on their own performance. You can ask them to describe the situation where they had to negotiate, the task they had to accomplish, the action they took, and the result they achieved. You can then praise their strengths, suggest areas for improvement, and offer tips and resources for further learning.

4 Provide them with opportunities

Finally, you can provide your mentee with opportunities to practice and enhance their negotiation skills in real or simulated scenarios. You can create or find role-playing exercises, case studies, or games that challenge your mentee to apply the negotiation skills they learned. You can also encourage your mentee to seek out or create situations where they can negotiate in their personal or professional life, such as asking for a raise, buying a car, or resolving a conflict. You can then debrief with your mentee after each practice session and discuss what went well, what didn't, and what they learned.

By following these steps, you can help your mentee develop negotiation skills that will serve them well in any context. Negotiation skills are not only useful for resolving conflicts, but also for creating value, building relationships, and advancing one's career. As a mentor, you can play a vital role in empowering your mentee to become a confident and competent negotiator.