How can you help clients who are resistant to self-love?

As a coach I think it’s important to spend some time with the client to understand their trauma and experiences to get to the root of it. Then Segway to learning how they define love and how to they love themselves. This provides an opportunity to explore it at a deeper level without judgement. I often use some of my own personal experiences (if needed) to help them know that they are not alone. It’s all about showing love in the session and providing solutions or directing them to the resources needed to begin the healing process.

As coaching does not work from a problem-centered and past-oriented focus (instead, it's person-centered and future-oriented), aiding a client explore the source of their self-criticism has to be short and tightly managed to avoid letting the client get stuck in the quicksand of the past. This can be done through identifying the cause in broad strokes without needing the client explaining the associated experience in detail. Example: "I didn't like my body because I was body-shamed a lot in my childhood" (STOP HERE). Details of the experience like who said what, when it happened, etc, are unnecessary. Then from here on, the life coach has to understand the results of the experience and work with the client to undo them.

When working with clients who resist self-love, Step by Step: 1. Empathic mirroring. 2. Explore the root of the problem. 3. Identify negative beliefs and work through with the client how things could be different. 4. Identify the developmental context. 5. Positive self-presentation techniques can be applied in working with the client. 6. Confrontation. 7. The therapist can encourage practices that promote self-compassion. 8. Identifying the client's strengths and achievements. 9. Plan small steps of self-love. 10. Psychoeducation. 11. Jointly define goals for the work, including aspects of self-love and self-acceptance. 12. Depending on the client's needs.

This is a great conversation thread! In my experience, Many people might dismiss the idea that they need to learn to love themselves, because they practice basic self-care, and appreciate some of their own strengths. Unfortunately, the task of loving yourself isn’t so simple as booking a massage or acknowledging some of your talents and skills (though that’s part of the equation). In reality, loving yourself requires a lot of hard work. You have to look at yourself, truly and deeply—including the bits of yourself that you’d rather not think about. And then you have to find a way to not just accept those things, but honor and love them, even if you’re working on self-improvement.

Here is what one could do to help clients overcome their resistance to self-love: - Decode their perception of self-love. - Help identify and release limiting beliefs at their own pace. - Provide a supportive space for sharing emotions and perspectives. - Encourage tracking positive and negative self-reflections or strokes daily. The goal is to accompany them on their introspective journey, fostering awareness of their true selves and facilitating the gradual embrace of self-love.

It is in one's own self interest to focus on strengths and minimize weaknesses. Thus, a person who doesn't like themselves and doesn't focus on caring for themselves, needs to learn to appreciate their own uniqueness - their God-given skills, abilities, and interests. Coaching them to acknowledge these, and focus less on inadequacies, while continually being open to feedback and lifelong learning, will yield the best results.

How frequently do you watch motivational videos and TED talks or seek advice from others? I firmly believe that self-love should originate from within. We must be prepared to alter our outlook. This shift will benefit us in the long term for our self-improvement. Let's not hold ourselves back from becoming the best version of ourselves.

Sometimes self-loathing can be illogical and have no cause (or it's not found yet). In such case, the life coach's patience need to hold up and not to push a "get-over-it" agenda on the client. Instead, keep encouraging the client to take baby steps to practice self-love, consistently affirming the client's effort, however small it might be. If the environment allows, encourage the client to find and expand their support system, recruiting new allies or take courses that help them develop their strengths further. These efforts can reinforce and supplement the life coach's efforts outside the coaching relationship. Lastly, avoid letting the client feel our support is because they are paying us but they are really authentic and genuine.

Guiding someone on the journey to self-love involves fostering a deeper understanding of their own emotions and embracing life's transient nature. Buddha's wisdom emphasizes that a person's negative reactions stem not from inherent badness but from inner turmoil reflected in their behavior. Realizing and accepting self-love serves as a catalyst for profound transformation, influencing how we compassionately interact with others and cultivating genuine empathy and kindness, catalyzing a positive change in our interactions with the world.

There are many types of psychological and other inventories and assessments that would help a person learn about themselves. A lack of self awareness may be the root cause for unproductive or unsatisfactory employees and providing such assessments, such as DISC or Strengthsfinder, would be well worth the money.

I would encourage nature walks. Movement of legs with momentum is a physical meditation, you get sunlight. Both exercise and vitamin D is responsible for endorphins.

If we look at & analyse all the attributes of the ills &/or the hardships (so-called) we come across, the source and origin remain the same: SELF. In an attempt to achieve something new (vying to achieve for the very first time), we instantly come out of our self and take to the first accessible path. Giving no time to prepare ourselves, not the outside of us - the so-called resources, we ensure & invite the pile of miseries on the way. Our SELF, the root, reason & the fountainhead of energy for all that we’re and we want to be, gets ignored, and we dart across. Think of the planning in management and the degree of efforts we (or our team) invested in preparing itself - The Self!