How can you help clients set realistic goals during life transitions?

In my experience with executives facing their Next Act while holding a corporate senior role, the main primal emotion relates to their sense of identity: if I am not this C-Suite/ SVP, who am I? Thinking in anything beyond their current role is tapping into unchartered waters -and it's scary. So the typical response is do nothing and hope for the best. Opening a conversation space about the new stage starts to normalize the situation, and shift the fight-or-flight response to an intentional unpacking and unfolding of what is possible. It is a prime moment to rekindle passions and interests that were left behind, reconnect with people, and most importantly integrating all these pieces in a powerful mosaic to inform the way forward.

There is a place for every emotion but when emotions hold us back from the things we want in life, then we may need to challenge where they come from and create new ways of thinking and experiencing the world. We often blame others or the world for what we feel but in fact we choose how we respond and internalise the world. That's because, behind every emotion there is a thought; it is this thought that leads us to feel what we do. This feeling in turn impacts the way we behave and therefore our outcomes in life. So when we acknowledge our emotions, also take a moment to notice the thought, how fair is it? Is it based on emotion alone or fact and fiction? What might a more useful way of thinking be like?

I often remind clients of a simple truth.... there are things we can control, others we can influence, some we can't control. Notice where you attention is lying and whether you need to shift it?

Without defining a clear measurable clear goal clients can sometimes forget how far they've already come (impacting motivation)! It also helps ensure they're being fair to themselves and not over or under working towards their goals, reducing the chances of things like burnout.

Absolutely take time to stop and celebrate once you've achieved a goal you set out to do that day, week... year! We often get busy moving onto the next thing (there will always be a next thing!) but out brain really benefits from the pause and recognition. It gives us both motivation and helps lock in any learnings and positive beliefs about our abilities.