How can you build trust with your mentee in a change leadership mentoring relationship?

Clarity upfront will ensure that you aren't creating a threat state for the mentee, which may unintentionally shut them off from getting the full experience. This is generally referred to as "contracting" and is also something that you can do as a change leader with your sponsor (the concept is transferrable to any work partnership you might have). Better to have a social contract of sorts up front as to how you might discuss problems together, or approach various situations than be surprised as to why things go awry later. You may also like to clarify your approach, to ensure it aligns for both of you, as mentoring generally differs from the likes of insights based / results coaching. Some might not be aware of the difference.

- Set an intention at the start of each session to "clear the space" you can do this by each sharing a brief note on what you'll be clearing off your mind to enable full attention on the session - Repeat back what you've heard (not word for word, but a synopsis in your words), to show you’ve listened, but also as an opportunity to clarify that you’ve understood - Use open questions, that explore where people are currently at, what thinking they've done around things and what options they may have, not only shows interest, but helps to create insights - Be curious vs. judgemental - Show gratitude at the end of each session, and acknowledge traction - Guide mentee to create if-then plans, in case roadblocks come up (encourage self-efficacy)

The most powerful way to build trust in a relationship is to share your own failures and what you learned from them, your own uncertainties and how you coped with them, and the current challenges you are facing. In this way you are demonstrating that you are human, that you are open and that you trust the mentee. The best references for authors to read and follow would be Amy Edmonson and Brenèe Brown-

I completely agree that this is one of the most important elements in relation to change leadership. Letting people know that no change is east and that you will face difficulties and discuss how best to overcome and deal with these will help your mentee lead as effectively as possible through the change. Open and honest communication is always key.

This is important for empathy, relatedness and is likely to help fire off oxytocin. With a few caveats. I say this as I have seen many a time a mentor make the conversations all about them, and it has not been helpful (this is one of the ways mentors and leaders can lose credibility and trust). - Make sure what you share is in context and relevant, so that you are not re-directing the focus to yourself or unintentionally projecting - You may wish to ask yourself, is what I am thinking of sharing going to add value to this conversation and the mentor? - How can I do it in a way that is succinct, specific yet generous to their learnings? - Ask for permission to share your experience for perspective sharing, so they understand the intent

Experimenting is risky. Doing nothing is risking too! Embracing the risk of failure from experimenting is easier said than done. You can encourage your mentee by sharing your own failure stories, and setting expectations for success, acceptable failure and unacceptable failure. Reflecting on the experiment is of course key to your mentee’s learning and growth, with is intrinsically motivating to them. Why not try a small experiment together to model what experimenting, reflecting and learning together looks like and validate it’s safe and will help the mentee (and you) grow.

What needs and circumstances change? You are growing together and therefore changing together. When re-contracting you’ll have the experience and lessons learned of working together, reviewing and renewing the relationships allows you to formalize not only each individual’s growth but also the relationship’s growth. ‘Contracting’ and ‘Re-contracting’ with a mentee sounds formal, but it really isn’t! You can follow the same process from Step 1.