Here's how you can infuse mindfulness into the feedback and evaluation process.

Start by encouraging both the giver and receiver of feedback to approach the conversation with a sense of presence and openness. Before diving in, take a moment to ground yourselves, perhaps with a few deep breaths or a short mindfulness exercise. During the feedback session, encourage mindfulness by emphasizing active listening and non-judgmental observation. Encourage the giver to express their observations and insights with kindness and clarity, focusing on specific behaviors or outcomes rather than making generalized judgments. Likewise, guide the receiver to listen openly, without immediately reacting defensively or dismissing the feedback. Remind them that feedback is an opportunity for growth!

During these processes, be fully attentive, listening without judgment or distraction. This focused presence allows you to observe and assess performance fairly, recognizing both strengths and areas for improvement. It also means being present with your own responses, ensuring that the feedback you provide is thoughtful and constructive. A mindful approach to evaluations creates a supportive atmosphere that can foster growth, learning, and a positive team culture.

Mindfulness isn’t going to stop you getting defensive in the face of negative feedback, particularly if it’s unexpected. It’s a natural response to feel upset, defensive and even angry if you feel the feedback isn’t warranted. Anger after all is a natural response to injustice or unfairness. What mindfulness will do is make you aware that you’ve been triggered and rather than react, you can choose how best to respond.

Give team members your undivided attention, showing genuine interest in their perspective. Avoid interrupting, and refrain from formulating a response while they're speaking. This demonstrates respect and allows for deeper understanding. Active listening also provides clearer insights into their experiences, challenges, and successes, enabling more meaningful and productive feedback that can lead to substantial growth and improvement.

When giving or receiving feedback, respond thoughtfully. Pause to reflect and consider the intention behind the words. Embrace encouragement, focusing on strengths and opportunities for growth. By infusing mindfulness into the feedback process, you create a nurturing space for self-discovery and development – cultivating a growth mindset that empowers you and others to thrive both personally and professionally.

Recognize that growth is a journey, not a destination. Mindfully acknowledge progress and areas for improvement, celebrating the unique journey of each individual. By embracing ]self-acceptance, you foster a compassionate and supportive environment that encourages authentic growth and development – nurturing resilience and adaptability.

I worked with a manager once that ran through about 10 different scenarios of how they thought a tough performance conversation with an employee might go. It won't surprise you that how it actually went was not one of those planned scenarios! Instead it took a turn that threw them off their messaging. It is always OK to ask for a reset. Either party in the conversation can say, I need a little time to digest what happened here, can we resume this conversation later (and pick a date and time). This allows space for reflection rather than reaction.

To make the most out of performance reviews, it's essential to have a mindful dialogue. It's a chance to uncover potential biases, shift perspectives, and ask the question, "What am I missing?" Remember, performance issues can stem from deficiencies in either motivation or ability. Is it a lack of knowledge of needed skills? Can training and mentoring help? Others may have the abilities but lack motivation. Can different incentives help? To achieve better results, it's important to stay present and focused without judgment. Authentic listening and using silence for thoughtful responses are key. There's a shared problem, and creating mutual benefits for everyone involved is key.

If you learned the feedback "sandwich" technique, please know this is not the best way to give feedback. Influence research tells us that to build trust, we need to be upfront with the bad news/cons first. Trying to hide it in the sandwich fails. "You are a terrific employee. Your email etiquette stinks. But hey we all love you." Not influential or effective. Instead, start with the tough news. " I wanted to start by talking about some of your emails. Here are the examples. This is why it is a problem." Then move on to discuss the good news, and why you want them to succeed.

Skip Sandwich approach. Instead start by celebrating the good stuff. Tell the person what they're doing well, what you appreciate about their work, and any specific achievements they had. This positive start puts everyone at ease and creates a safe space for open discussion. Then, after highlighting their strengths, focus on specific areas for improvement. Don't just say things like "you could do better." Instead, offer clear and actionable steps that can help them grow in that area. Maybe it's suggesting a different approach for a specific task, or recommending resources that can help them develop a particular skill. This way, the feedback feels like helpful guidance, not just negativity