You’re working remotely and have a conflict with a colleague. What tools can you use to resolve it?

Writing down your thoughts in a third-party viewpoint or objective manner can be helpful. Can we identify the root cause of the conflict, is it a process issue or a personality issue? Then, once we have collected our thoughts I think a phone call or meeting face-to-face is ideal and helps bridge the gap toward common understanding.

Conflict often contains 2 key components - tactical and relational difference. Almost always conflict is the result of unclear expectations or unspoken assumptions about a task at hand. Before engaging with a colleague, identify the work task at the center of the conflict. Task conflicts are easier to resolve, because they are mostly a matter of slowing down to find facts and better defining shared expectations. If there is interpersonal conflict too, identify what was said or done that was offensive, and know why. Giving a detailed example is helpful! Be sure to collect your cool and give it some time, before requesting conversation. Then, with an intention of finding resolution, lean into conversation, seeking understanding.

1. If it is a professional difference of opinion, I would write down my views in an email and share it with the colleague. Thinking through my viewpoint as I write often gives me more clarity than just discussing it. My colleague is in a better position with my email to identify the points of disagreement and we can set up a call to discuss. 2. If it is a personal issue, I would propose a virtual 1:1 coffee and lead with honesty. I would tell my colleague about how I feel about their behaviour and then invite them to share their view. It is important to actively listen so that you can clear the air and decide how to move forward.

Conflict must be resolved via voice - either video or phone remotely. From a leadership perspective, come with open ears and do more listening than speaking at first. You will be amazed at how powerful it is to listen clearly and thoughtfully to counterpoints and issues first.

Writing is indeed a "tool" these days, but in remote work, it is a weapon of mass destruction... Speaking, but above all, LISTENING is the path for remote work to function very well. If we hire professionals, it is to listen to them, to guide them to success, to want them to succeed, and that only depends on listening and guiding them. A manager who doesn't listen is a manager who, in the medium term, will fire people thinking they are not doing their job. No, people have always been good; the manager just never had time to listen and guide them. I love to talk and to write, but I am "married" to listening. It was in listening that I solved my biggest problems in teams always. So my recommendation is always: Listen and undoubtedly feel.

I personally feel proper communication will help to sort out the conflict. One one one direct communication- a video call incase of remote will help. However before the discussion we have to analyse the reason , what came be our negotiation discussion. The root of the issue, we should have all the details and preparing for the discussion will give fruitful results

Conflicts may emerge from varying perspectives or goals. I personally suggest avoiding using chats or emails for sensitive matters. Instead, schedule a video call and take the time to prepare for a constructive discussion. Engage in a 1-1 conversation, fostering active listening without immediate responses. Approach the situation calmly, empathize with their perspective, and strive to understand their agenda. Foster a larger-hearted approach for positive resolution, engaging in 1-1 discussions while maintaining regular virtual meetings. Approach the situation calmly, empathize with their perspective, and strive to understand their agenda. Foster a larger-hearted approach for positive resolution.

Don't ignore it and think it will correct itself ..it won't. Best is to first cool off ..don't respond immediately... normally when you have calmed down a bit, you feel differently about an issue after a while... The next day, when you are calmer and hopefully not upset anymore you can send your colleague a message and ask him/her if the two of you can have a chat at a certain time when both of you are relaxed and don't have any deadlines pending. Then you give him/her the benefit of the doubt and ask if your perception or interpretation of the situation was correct. Hopefully the conversation will continue in a calm manner and be resolved.

Recently, I had this exact situation come up. Instead of having a virtual conversation, an email was sent. While the email stated her perspective, it didn't allow for understanding of the other side, empathy, and tackling any assumptions wrongly made. Instead, it left the recipient feeling attacked and without a way to voice her perspective. Because so much is lost in translation in emails, I suggest a phone call or a video call. It is the tougher choice but it shows respect for the other side and a willingness to understand each other's perspectives. It also shows that as colleagues, you need to get through the conflict because ultimately, you're on the same side.

This model is very helpful. Acknowledging someone’s strong points can go a long way in rebuilding trust. Providing options allows for an opportunity for a new choice, supporting a new path forward!

Seeking feedback during intentional follow up helps immensely for sustained conflict resolution. Unresolved issues or overlooked concerns can lead to simmering resentment. Regular feedback helps in addressing lingering issues, preventing their escalation. Seeking feedback maintains an open channel of communication. It encourages ongoing dialogue and demonstrates a commitment to resolving conflicts effectively. Feedback helps in ensuring that resolutions are sustainable. It allows for adjustments to be made to solutions to ensure they remain effective over time. Gathering feedback post-resolution reinforces positive relationships. It shows a commitment to understanding and improving interactions among team members.

Asking feedback well early helps to stop the conflict and it creates the trust. When we ask for the feedback we should accept positive and negative feedback and analyse it and work out.

Read the following. ‘What is going on?’ Now read it as if you were: A person finding two people fighting. A person walking in to see another watching a tv show. A person who has walked into room to find a surprise party has been organised in their honour. Different emotions make you read the words differently. Communicating remotely is like being given only half the story, which can lead to us filling in the gaps with our own story elements. Asking the person who wrote the email, or said the thing, to fill in those gaps for you, is usually safer than relying on others. Hey, when you said ‘what’s going on?’ Were you curious or concerned? I wasn’t sure which, as it was hard for me to hear, or the email wasn’t clear.

In my experience, here are some ways to successfully resolve conflict with remote partners. Tools like Zoom, Microsoft Teams, or Google Meet enable face-to-face interactions. Platforms such as Slack, Microsoft Teams, or Discord facilitate communication and problem-solving. Tools like Trello, Asana, or Monday.com help organize tasks, assign responsibilities, and track progress. They ensure clarity for work deadlines. Google Workspace and Microsoft Office 365 enable real-time collaboration. Platforms like Miro facilitate remote brainstorming, mind mapping, and collaboration, enhancing creativity and idea-sharing. Platforms such as Kialo or Mediate.com provide resources and guidance for conflict resolution in virtual settings.

It is a good practice to sit down and try to see the point of contention or disagreement from their point of view. Ask how their opinion benefits them and aligns with their values. Try assuming positive intent and see if you can come up with reasons why their point of view has merit. Examine your own reactions as well. How do your beliefs benefit you? How do your beliefs benefit others? What is the driving reason behind why you may be viewing or reacting to this situation a certain way that those without your same lived experience would have trouble understanding without a deeper conversation with you? Self awareness can be the key to unlocking professional harmony with others.