You’re a leader. How can you avoid the most common mistakes in relation to Emotional Intelligence?

We should talk about emotions at work. We should especially talk about fear, which is everywhere in the working world and seldom discussed. When you are evaluated and monitored all the time as most people are at work, you are going to feel fear sometimes. It is absurd and remarkable that companies have mental health programs but seldom deal with the mental health challenges they create for their teams. What if instead of offering help with the stress employees feel, we kept them from feeling tstress in the first place? What if goals were reasonable and employees had more input into targets? What if there were flexibility in the work schedule and what if employees had latitude over how their jobs get done and where they work?

One thing I learned in the last ten years is that the maxim “treat others as you would wish to be treated “ to become “treat others as they wish to be treated “ which implies the need for knowing your team mates as individuals and not simply transference of your values and belief systems onto them. Call that emotional intelligence if you like.

Reconocer y comprender tus propias emociones es el primer paso para manejarlas efectivamente. He aprendido que tomarme un momento para reflexionar sobre cómo me siento ante diferentes situaciones me permite abordarlas de manera más constructiva. La autoconciencia emocional me ayuda a evitar que mis emociones nublen mi juicio o afecten negativamente mis interacciones con los demás.

Nice to say but difficult to implement. People often don't care if the leader is going through a hard time. They focus on their own situation.

Understanding what motivates human, and framing it in the workplace environment can contribute to better relationships and interactions with employees as a leader. Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs and the prioritization of getting to know your employees root motivations. Would help you view colleagues and direct reports for what they are; human. Emotions cannot be separated from humans if you want the best of that human to show up in the workplace. When this happens it’s usually the worst of the emotions that inevitably gain the spotlight.

Entender las emociones de los miembros de mi equipo es importante para una comunicación y colaboración efectivas. He desarrollado esta habilidad prestando atención no solo a lo que las personas dicen, sino también a cómo lo dicen y a su lenguaje corporal. Esto me permite responder de manera más empática y apoyar a mi equipo de manera adecuada.

To steer clear of common Emotional Intelligence (EI) pitfalls, practice active listening, fostering empathy, and managing emotions effectively. Avoid dismissing emotions or reacting impulsively. Encourage open communication, acknowledging both positive and negative feelings. Lead by example, demonstrating self-awareness and empathy in your interactions. Cultivate a culture of psychological safety where team members feel comfortable expressing themselves. Stay mindful of non-verbal cues and practice genuine empathy in your responses. Remember, EI isn't just about understanding emotions; it's about using that understanding to build stronger relationships and make better decisions.

I want to avoid pre-judgment. Pre-judging a person that they want to harm you, that they will refuse you in any case, that they are not going to listen. This adds negativity to the emotions even much before you talk to them.

Misinterpreting or overlooking the emotions of others can lead to misunderstandings, conflicts, and strained relationships. Practice active listening and empathy to better understand the perspectives and emotions of those around you. Pay attention to verbal and nonverbal cues, and ask clarifying questions when needed to ensure accurate understanding.

Time for an honest self-appraisal. Would most people who you’ve worked with you say that you bring out the best or the worst in them? When I reflect on my own career and the various reasons I left a role, it was always because of a poor relationship with a manager.

I've learned that responding thoughtfully rather than reacting impulsively is critical for emotional intelligence. In heated moments, our instinct is to get defensive or lash out. But I know those knee-jerk reactions damage trust and morale. Instead, when I feel triggered, I pause, take a breather, and choose my response intentionally. I strive to see the other side's perspective and communicate respectfully, even if I disagree. Saying something like "I understand your view, and here's where I'm coming from..." allows us to discuss issues constructively. By modeling this restraint, we can create an inclusive environment where emotions are acknowledged and managed effectively, leading to stronger relationships and organizational success.

This one really hits home. I have found drafting an email laying out everything you are feeling including what you disagree with helps….. then The key is save it drafts. Sleep on it, read it the next day and 9/10 I never send it. It does let me see how emotional I reacted and then I try to lean in and talk to the person who made me feel that way.

Sometime people will be offended no matter how you say it. Some people take constructive criticism well, whilst others will see it as criticism. When you receive it, remember- how can this make me a better leader? Is this true? How can I improve ? We all can improve in some ways, so hear what others say, especially if a few are saying the same thing, then you most likely have to work on what they are raising.

Reacting is often immediate and emotional, while responding involves taking a moment to think through the situation and its implications. In my experience, pausing to consider your words and actions can make a significant difference in leadership effectiveness. This approach allows you to address issues calmly and constructively, reducing the likelihood of misunderstandings or conflict. By choosing to respond thoughtfully, you set a positive example for your team, fostering a culture of respect and open communication.

Listen. Force yourself to listen. Even if you are certain you have heard it before. Even if you do not like what the person is saying. Listen. Validate the person not the content. Let the person get it all out. Completely. Take the person off line and ask more about the topic. As a leaders, you can learn more about the person, learn about your organization and yourself. Force yourself to listen completely to this person one time. If it is habitual or done in an exhibition-like manner, you’ll need to address this person differently, but until you have had a complete “airing of the grievances” this person will keep repeating this point. Begin by listening.

First and foremost, a leader must (stressing the must part) always think about the troops first in every single decision they make and put them first. Second, the leader can/should get to know their people as well as they can. Fact is, not everyone is motivated by the same things. Some people are motivated by fancy titles and roles and others are motivated by more $$$. Others are motivated by having fun, social outings and the leader must balance all of that equally.

A common mistake by well intentioned leaders is not getting objective and diverse feedback on how you are actually showing up across your stakeholder groups — i.e. their perceptions of your demonstrated Emotional Intelligence (EI) in their interactions with you. Reading articles and books, listening to podcasts, and online training modules are all good place to start. EI self-assessments and mentoring can highlight development opportunities and help advance your EI in narrow paths of your life. To maximize your self-awareness—the bedrock of EI—we are best served by an anonymous 360 EI Assessment debriefed by an EI-specialized Coach to reveal blind spots and other key developmental opportunities! DM me if you would like help with that!

You know it’d be the wiser thing to stay calm and not give in to your feelings — but it’s hard in the moment. This is where emotional intelligence comes in. It’s the ability to be aware of and understand your own emotions while you control your reaction. If you lack it, you’ll make your life miserable in multiple ways.

EI requires self-management, an ongoing task. Humans should expect that their own and others EI will fluctuate. For example, emotional self-control does not mean containing all emotions at all costs. There is value in ventilating and processing strong emotion with someone outside your organization and to pre-game high stakes communications.

Emotional Intelligence is a skill that requires ongoing development and practice. Neglecting to prioritize your EI development can limit your effectiveness as a leader. Dedicate time and resources to enhancing your EI skills through self-reflection, feedback from others, and targeted training or coaching programs. Set goals for improvement and commit to continuous learning and growth.

Reconocer y celebrar los logros, tanto grandes como peque?os, es vital para mantener la moral y la motivación del equipo. He encontrado que expresar aprecio genuino y específico fortalece las relaciones y promueve una cultura positiva. Celebrar los éxitos juntos ha sido una fuente de motivación y cohesión para mi equipo.

For a leader to be emotionally intelligent, they must never make the error of omitting to express gratitude and celebration. Acknowledging and praising team members' accomplishments and efforts improves morale and creates a pleasant work atmosphere. A genuine "thank you" or a team celebration for reaching goals might suffice as this. Leaders run the danger of demoralizing their staff and fostering an underappreciation culture if they ignore these opportunities. Celebrating victories, no matter how big or little, on a regular basis fosters team trust, loyalty, and a sense of belonging—all of which are essential elements of strong emotional intelligence in leadership.

Celebration and appreciation are the most effective yet easy ways to build an emotional connection. It doesn't always have to be formal; a simple chat over coffee or a lunch date with your team can be just as impactful as official recognition, if not more. Be your team's biggest critic but also their greatest cheerleader.

Cultivate the power of Emotional Intelligence by regularly celebrating achievements. Recognize and appreciate yourself and others to boost morale and create a positive culture. Express gratitude for efforts and contributions, fostering engagement and satisfaction.

Failing to recognize and appreciate the efforts and contributions of others can undermine morale and motivation within your team. Cultivate a culture of appreciation by regularly acknowledging and celebrating successes, both big and small. Express gratitude for the hard work and dedication of your team members, and create opportunities for them to feel valued and recognized.

La Inteligencia Emocional no se trata solo de ser amable o agradable. Se trata de comunicar de manera efectiva, navegar por conflictos, liderar con empatía y tomar decisiones conscientes. Una de las lecciones más importantes que he aprendido es que la IE es tan crítica para el éxito del liderazgo como las habilidades técnicas o estratégicas. Al estar consciente de estos errores comunes y trabajar activamente para evitarlos, puedes fortalecer tu liderazgo y fomentar un entorno de trabajo más productivo y armonioso.

Being transparent is a key driver in sharing your emotions to the team and also someone who can listen with sincerity does help a lot in understanding the emotions on the other side. Creating a respectful and open environment where one can talk to another freely helps in a great bonding and gives everyone a psychologically safe environment nurturing emotional quotients.

Leadership isn't just about strategy and decision-making; it's also about understanding & managing emotions. Common mistakes leaders make in terms of emotional intelligence include ignoring emotions, lacking empathy, micromanaging, communicating insensitively, and reacting emotionally. To excel in leadership, it's essential to cultivate emotional intelligence. By developing self-awareness, practicing empathy, delegating and trusting, communicating effectively, and managing our own emotions, we can create a more supportive and productive work environment. Let's prioritize emotional intelligence in leadership to foster stronger teams, healthier work cultures, and greater success. #EmotionalIntelligence #LeadershipSkills #WorkplaceCulture

Praticar a empatia ativa, ouvindo atentamente o colaborador, colocando-se no lugar dos outros e reconhecendo as suas emo??es.

Be someone people aspire to be. Be respectful, always be open to listen, learn and teach. A good leader will always be remembered!