You're facing a peer who rejects feedback as irrelevant. How do you navigate this challenging situation?

2 Communicate Effectively

Effective communication is vital when dealing with a peer who finds feedback irrelevant. It's important to express your thoughts clearly and without judgment. Use "I" statements to convey your observations and feelings, which can help prevent your peer from feeling attacked. For instance, say "I noticed that..." instead of "You didn't..." This subtle shift in language can make a significant difference in how your feedback is received and can lead to a more open and less defensive exchange.

3 Offer Specifics

When feedback is vague, it can easily be dismissed as irrelevant. To avoid this, provide specific examples to illustrate your points . Detailing particular instances where an issue arose or suggesting concrete ways to improve can make your feedback more actionable and harder to refute. By focusing on the specifics, you're demonstrating that your feedback is grounded in reality and is meant to be helpful, not critical.

4 Encourage Dialogue

Encouraging a two-way dialogue is essential when your feedback is initially rejected. Invite your peer to share their thoughts and feelings about the feedback you've provided. Listen actively and without interruption. This not only shows respect for their perspective but also provides you with valuable insights into their reactions and how you might adjust your approach. Through open dialogue, you can work together to find common ground and solutions that are mutually beneficial.

5 Follow Up

Following up after giving feedback shows that you are committed to your peer's development and the team's success. It also gives you an opportunity to see if your feedback was taken into consideration and to offer further support if needed. A follow-up doesn't have to be formal; a simple conversation to check in can suffice. This ongoing engagement can help build trust and reinforce the importance of feedback in the workplace.

6 Adjust Tactics

If your initial attempts at providing feedback don't yield the desired results, be prepared to adjust your tactics . Consider if there might be a better time, place, or method for delivering your message. Sometimes, written feedback can be less confrontational than verbal feedback , or a group setting might be less intimidating than a one-on-one conversation. Be flexible and patient; finding the right approach with your peer may take time and several attempts.