To connect with reserved interviewees, adjust your communication by asking open-ended, non-confrontational questions and using a warm, conversational tone. Offer reassurance and pause to give them time to respond. Build rapport by showing genuine interest in their experiences and using active listening techniques to make them feel comfortable.

Most interviews are predictable. We ask the same questions, hear the same answers. It's efficient, sure, but does it really work? What if we dropped the script entirely? No more "where do you see yourself in five years?" or "what's your biggest weakness?" Just two people having an honest conversation about work, ambitions, and whether they'd actually enjoy collaborating. It might get uncomfortable. You might discover things you weren't expecting. But that's the point. In a world of curated online personas, a frank discussion stands out. Next time you're hiring (or job hunting), try it. See what happens when you stop performing and start talking.

Handling a quiet interviewee is not a problem unless you make it one, especially if you have ADHD, like me :). The solution I learned while teaching quiet students is 'think time.' Ask your questions and then pause—sit in silence. People, especially interviewees, feel uncomfortable with silence and will typically fill the gap. 'Think time' is around 30 seconds. Some candidates need this time to organize their thoughts, while others need to think before they speak. It also shows them that you care and genuinely listen, enhancing their perception of the interview and you as an interviewer. The interview is not a race. If that doesn't work, restate the question differently or go to the next question.

To connect with reserved interviewees, adjust your communication style by: Create a Comfortable Environment: Start with a warm welcome and casual small talk to ease tension. Use Open-Ended Questions: Encourage deeper responses by asking questions that invite elaboration. Practice Active Listening: Show genuine interest by nodding, summarizing their points, and asking follow-up questions. Be Patient: Allow pauses for them to gather their thoughts without rushing them. Share Personal Insights: Offer relatable anecdotes to build rapport and make them feel more at ease. By adapting your approach, you can foster a more open and engaging dialogue.

A more patient, laid-back approach, active listening, open-ended questions, and a genuine interest in developing rapport through their experiences and viewpoints are all good ways to adjust your communication style when interviewing people who are reserved. This will help you avoid pressing for quick, in-depth answers.