You're coaching a resistant C-suite client. How can you break through their resistance to change?

One of the many ways I could approach this is the following: Firstly, I empathize with their resistance to change and meet where they are. I ask the questions to help them name what is beneficial about their current experience and what is serving them. Not wronging the client always creates space. On the other hand, I help them dream of a better future imagining what it could be like if they could do one or two things about what is getting in the way. Then I bridge the gap between the two and ask what needs to be learned and what what wants to emerge. Warmly,

If a client, regardless of their level of seniority, is resisting your help (which is synonymous with being resistant to change since coaching is about behavioral change), start by asking why they agreed to work with you in the first place. Even if coaching was "assigned" to them, understanding what they could get out of it might help. Finding what they are interested in, what skills they would like to expand or develop, what motivates them to engage in continuous learning, and what they'd like to do next in their career, essentially - their small a and big A agendas, might help you align on ways you could be helpful to them. Such alignment is likely to reduce resistance and foster collaboration.

Coaching a resistant C-suite client can be a challenging undertaking. The key lies in establishing trust and credibility early on. We need to begin by actively listening to their concerns and acknowledging their fears about change. If they are available, it can be helpful to use data and case studies to illustrate the benefits of the proposed changes and then align these benefits with the organization's goals. It's essential to frame the conversation around their values and vision. If you can demonstrate empathy and provide a clear, strategic roadmap, you will gradually break through their resistance and ultimately foster a collaborative environment that will be conducive to change.

Coaching a resistant C-suite client can indeed be challenging but highly rewarding. One effective strategy is to ask the right questions, helping them explore their own reservations and insights. Maintaining a non-judgmental approach and demonstrating empathy can create a safe space for them to open up. Being a sounding board when required is crucial—sometimes they just need someone to listen. Don’t shy away from taking them to uncomfortable places; it’s in these moments that true growth happens. By combining empathy, coaching presence, mindfulness and the right questions, you can facilitate meaningful change even with the most resistant clients.

We often see a pattern along the way of the coaching journey. The client would set goals and even commit to them. When they fail to deliver a particular task, sometimes even reminding them of being accountable of this task wouldn't help until we get to the bottom of what really stands in the way. It is always Fear and it has such a wide spectrum ranging from being scared to fail all the way to not knowing how to do it and be judge. Let's start there. Let's work on these Fears first.

Understand the underlying fears driving their resistance to change. These fears could stem from concerns about losing control, fear of failure, or negative experiences with change. By identifying these fears, you can address them directly and alleviate their concerns.

Focus on the client's strengths and how they can be applied to the change process. By highlighting their capabilities and past successes, you can build their confidence in their ability to navigate and embrace change.

No Clarity, no Commitment. How can you possibly be committed to something that isn't crystal clear? This is precisely when in any coaching journey we do goal setting and we hold the client accountable of them. Here is the thing though, these goals might be overwhelmingly big hence the need to set smaller mini goals and again hold the client accountable to them.

Change never comes easy for any Executive yet discomfort comes in levels. The coach is pretty aware of that and this is the main reason why while designing the alliance right at the beginning the client holds the client accountable. Not only that, accountability gets actually structured so when the client fails to meet a task at a particular time and date, it is agreed on how the coach reaches out and nudges the client to comply.

I introduced regular check-ins and progress reviews to foster accountability. By setting short-term milestones and celebrating small wins created a sense of momentum and accomplishment that gradually broke down his resistance.

One effective strategy for helping C-suite clients who resist change is real-time observation and feedback. I once worked with a leader who struggled to accept her 360-degree feedback. During a session, I noticed the same behavior pattern she resisted acknowledging. I paused and shared my observations, explaining how her behavior impacted our conversation. This immediate feedback helped her see the unintended effects of her actions, leading to a breakthrough. She thanked me for the new perspective. In summary, our presence as coaches and real-time feedback is key to helping clients recognize and modify counterproductive behaviors.

As a coach, I encourage my clients to journal which is the best way to reflect on what they are truly aspiring for. As they do so they will come to realize what actually stands in the way of them achieving their goals. I invite them to read their reflections and to analyze them as if it was them who have narrated the content. We come across infinite "aha"moments!

Encouraging reflection opens a door to deeper understanding. It allows clients to connect with their inner selves, examining not just their actions but the motivations behind them. When we bring in Spiritual Intelligence, we tap into a source that guides leaders beyond logic. This can challenge them to see change as a natural evolution rather than an obstacle. By contemplating their purpose, they may find clarity that transforms resistance into acceptance. Ultimately, it is about aligning their vision with their values, fostering a “Holistic” approach to leadership that embraces growth.

Encouraging clients to reflect on their experiences and the outcomes of their actions can lead to valuable insights. Reflection helps them recognize the benefits of change and how it aligns with their personal and professional growth.

Aside from evoking awareness through specific (thought-provoking) questions, the client might benefit from "mindfulness" or consciousness exercises -- depends on the situation and the client's preference. For instance, if more reflection is a key goal, understanding the client's regimen in this area is critical. If the client doesn't normally focus on reflection -- meditation, journaling, therapy, etc. -- then, it might be worth asking the client if that's something they're interested in doing. If the client already has a regimen, explore how to incorporate this into your coaching sessions. Reflections are a great way to challenge patterns, encourage growth, and even drive accountability during the coaching engagement.

Self-Acceptance and Self-Partnering is an important trait for leaders. Through my coaching I would help my client cultivate these. It makes it easier for them to accept change within and without.

One of the most important things you can do as a coach with a resistant client is ask thought-provoking, powerful questions that make them pause. That’s the moment when you may be able to ask a truly tough question that breaks through the resistance. The questions you ask are what brings a new insight. Keep asking good questions and resistance will melt away.

Start with the WHY (learn from Simon Sinek). Why are we here to discuss the change in direction, or change in strategy, or change in goals? Clearly articulate the vision driving this. Next comes the HOW. This is the process of turning their resistance into support. Involve them in the process, go from stating to creating, and combine creative and critical thinking for problem-solving. Make them feel like partners. Finally, the WHAT shows the quantifiable benefits and potential positive impact on the bottom line or sustenance in the face of changing scenarios and the onset of disruptive forces. Address potential challenges and present strategies to overcome them.

C-Suite leaders can be hijacked by their 'inner critic' - that critical inner voice that limits peak performance. Working with leaders to discover and diminish those voices at the root cause allows clients to open up to healthy and lasting change. This shift transforms resistance to change into growth mindset behaviours, where self awareness fosters both peak performance and wellbeing.

Establishing clarity is vital to coach a resistant C-suite leader. Resistance could come from the following reasons; 1) Leaders don't know the impact of their behaviors, emotions, or decisions 2) Leaders don't see the value of change 3) Don't have the capacity to change 4) Self-limiting narratives Various assessments (360, EQ, Thinking/Behaving styles, vertical development, etc.), engaging people other than direct reports, and narrative release work will help them gain clarity to start with.