In the beginning you emphasise that we are reviewing performance versus agreed standards and there is no personal criticism You must define what success looks like with absolute figures and with operational KPIs and this is before the beginning of agreed period During the review, start with the positive things that done by the employee, then the gaps and things that should be done better Any gap you discuss must be proven by evidence and any gap should be rectified by action to show the way to avoid next time

Open the dialogue by asking how things are with the team member and if everything is okay with them. Emphasize how I am concerned for them as I'm seeing some performance issues and wanted to make sure everything was okay for them. This approach allows for an open ended conversation and allows the team member to drive the conversation in the direction they want and often reveals a lot of insight that i did not previously have. It also has the benefit of difusing a potentially heated situation and engages the team member to be a collaborative solution rather than a defensive combative.

It can be challenging giving feedback to a defensive team member but with an approach that is both thoughtful and respectful, it is possible to create a positive environment. Using feedback as opportunity for growth, rather than a tool to criticise, a constructive, open atmosphere can be created which can help a team member to improve without feeling attacked in a negative manner.

I always go for two-way conversations. Sit together and discuss all the work-related issues and appreciate which jobs are done on time and above average. Then, move to the points where we (always use we, not you or me) need to improve and request their suggestions. This will motivate the member to learn and get training where it is lacking. As a manager, any defensiveness of team members means the team's overall performance is affected, and so is yours.