Conflicts with bandmates are inevitable, but they can also damage your creativity, performance, and reputation. How can you deal with them effectively and constructively? Here are some steps you can take to resolve conflicts with bandmates and keep your musical harmony.
The first step is to identify the root cause of the conflict. Is it about artistic differences, personal issues, financial matters, or something else? Sometimes, conflicts can arise from misunderstandings, assumptions, or unspoken expectations. Try to be clear and honest about what is bothering you and why. Listen to your bandmates' perspectives and try to understand their motivations and feelings.
Usually it boils down to egos. We have to allow for inclusion even if the levels of talent vary the band mates are team mates and everyone adds to the quality blend.
Jealousy and egos seem to be the biggest problem… Although I had a harmonica player at one time and alcohol was his problem, he would be clean for several months, all of a sudden fall off the wagon, and he just wanted to fight and argue with everyone
if it is musical, just play it all together, that's the soul of a band. if it is about time, the band is done if it is about money, be transparent if it is about health, look for help
I can see another alternative if I might be so bold. All the members of the band take a turn at being front-of-stage to sing their own composition or, to do a solo performance on the preferred instrument. This way every member of the band becomes visible to their fans/followers, then in no-way dictates that 1 performer is more important than any of the others. It will also instil a collective unity and respect for each other, instead of a single performer standing-out from the rest.
Musicians are basically entertainers, & they all love to be in the spotlight! Show compassion for everyone, & be gentle, yet diplomatic in dealing with them. It’s important to have honest conversations about whatever the situation pertains to. Eventually you’ll come to a better understanding of the issues, & come to a better resolution to the problem.
The second step is to communicate respectfully with your bandmates. Avoid blaming, accusing, or insulting them. Use "I" statements to express your feelings and needs, rather than "you" statements that can sound accusatory or defensive. For example, say "I feel frustrated when you don't show up on time for rehearsals" instead of "You are always late and unprofessional". Be open to feedback and criticism, and acknowledge your own mistakes and shortcomings.
I always used myself as the idiot stick… And make myself look bad in things that I do or not do… Always seems the brighten up there problems…
Para resolver conflitos com colegas de banda, a comunica??o é a chave. é fundamental promover um ambiente aberto onde todos possam expressar suas preocupa??es. Além disso, definir expectativas claras e papéis dentro da banda ajuda a evitar desentendimentos. A busca por solu??es criativas e comprometimento mútuo também desempenham um papel vital na resolu??o de conflitos e no fortalecimento da harmonia dentro da banda.
The third step is to seek common ground with your bandmates. Find out what you have in common, such as your musical goals, values, or passions. Focus on the positive aspects of your relationship and the benefits of working together. Try to compromise and negotiate on the issues that you disagree on, and respect each other's opinions and preferences. Remember that you are a team, and that your success depends on your collaboration and cooperation.
Despite their eventual breakup, The Beatles in their early and mid-career were a prime example of finding common ground. Their shared love for rock and roll and desire to experiment musically led to some of the most groundbreaking albums in music history. Even when their personal differences became more pronounced, they managed to create iconic music by respecting each other’s creative inputs. Coldplay is another example of a band that has managed to stay together for a long time by focusing on their shared musical vision and values. They are known for their democratic process in songwriting and decision-making, ensuring that each member's voice is heard and valued.
The fourth step is to use constructive conflict with your bandmates. Constructive conflict is when you use your differences as a source of creativity, innovation, and improvement. Instead of avoiding or suppressing your conflicts, you embrace them and use them to challenge and inspire each other. For example, you can use your different musical styles, influences, or skills to create new and original sounds, or you can use your feedback and criticism to refine and polish your songs.
A classic example of this is The Rolling Stones. Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, known as "The Glimmer Twins," often had differing musical tastes and opinions. Jagger's inclination towards contemporary pop and dance music clashed with Richards' love for traditional rock and blues. However, this tension led to a creative synthesis that defined the unique sound of The Rolling Stones. The Beatles' later albums, like "Abbey Road" and "The White Album," showcase how their individual differences in musical direction led to a rich diversity of styles within a single album. By embracing their differences and using them as a source of inspiration and challenge, these bands were able to create something new and original.
The fifth step is to seek external help with your bandmates. Sometimes, conflicts can be too complex, intense, or persistent to resolve by yourselves. In that case, you may need to seek external help from a third party, such as a mediator, a mentor, a coach, or a therapist. They can help you to facilitate the communication, understand the underlying issues, and find mutually acceptable solutions. They can also help you to deal with any emotional or psychological effects of the conflict, such as stress, anger, or resentment.
The sixth step is to prevent future conflicts with your bandmates. You can do this by establishing clear and realistic expectations, roles, and responsibilities for each member of the band. You can also create and follow some ground rules, such as how to make decisions, how to handle money, how to schedule rehearsals and gigs, and how to communicate and resolve issues. You can also maintain a positive and supportive atmosphere, by celebrating your achievements, giving compliments, and having fun together.
Para prevenir conflitos futuros em uma banda, é fundamental encará-la como uma empresa, onde seus membros s?o considerados sócios. Além das medidas mencionadas anteriormente, essa perspectiva empresarial implica em estabelecer uma estrutura organizacional clara, com divis?o de tarefas e responsabilidades, definir processos de tomada de decis?o e compartilhamento de lucros e despesas de forma transparente. Isso contribui para uma gest?o eficiente e ajuda a evitar desentendimentos relacionados a aspectos financeiros e estruturais da banda.
Step back, just do your "job", play the best you can, turn down your guitar...even if just a bit....your time will come to show your skills and play the songs YOU like.....band stress is inevitable....however it helps if there is an undisputed leader in the band.
Be prepared to swallow your pride and apologise if you are partly to blame. Even if you are not, be prepared to settle differences for the sake of reconciliation.
Free jam at a very very slow tempo, maybe 40 bpm . It's also important to remember that everyone is hearing so much all at once so also have space and time for extended solos by each contributor.