What steps can you take to address verbal abuse in the workplace?

Verbal abuse in the workplace takes a long time to be identified as abuse. In a culture of competitiveness, everyone is outdoing each other to stay on top of the game. A little verbal spat between colleagues is often misunderstood as a necessary part of competition. Especially if one of them is a female. Verbal abuse need not even have unparliamentary words. It could just be disguised as a compliment on physical attributes. It is abuse, nevertheless. the best way to deal with it is to push back immediately. no one should be OK with it, not even once. Setting boundaries is a process. Pushback needs to be immediate. THIS IS NOT OK. I WILL NOT TOLERATE IT. That's all!

It is really important to have personal safety. Remember to document any verbal exchange (dates, places, times, and any witnesses). To respond in this type of exchange perhaps try practicing with "I" messages. Looks like this ' When you yell at me I feel embarrassed, please stop' Another tip that caught my bullies off guard was responding 'it seems you are really upset and your language is offensive, we can talk once you have calmed down and we can have a civilized conversation.' They were stunned. Your words have to feel comfortable, I had to practice before speaking up. Scary yes, worth it absolutely. Remember we cannot control the bully but we can control how we respond, how we react and what we retain.

America has SOME opportunities for defending employees against abuse. Too often, though, the abuse is from an agency head. One Sheriff made employees pay into an illegal "COMPANY UNION" he owned or be fired. The Sheriff was protected by the laws of his state.

One thing about setting boundaries is that they need to be set in a clear and concise manner right from the beginning. Our fears and insecurities need to be replaced with high self-esteem, and emotional savviness. Additionally, one can observe who and what one is subscribing to and the way others react/ respond to your actions and behaviors, which gives an insight into one's own and other people's beliefs and assumptions about various topics and situations. And yes, No is a complete sentence! Standing up for what is right and not letting abusers trespass your boundaries is actually a strength worth nurturing...

At a personal level, I would address verbal abuse in the workplace by calmly and privately discussing the issue with the person involved, expressing how their behavior is affecting me and seeking a resolution. If the problem persists, I would escalate the matter to my supervisor or HR, following company policies to ensure it's properly documented and handled

In my own personal experience it is very important that you set boundaries and you let the people who are verbally abusing you know that you will not tolerate their behavior. I have also gone as far as telling them how they will treat me. Usually, when you are confident and adamant about what you will not accept, people will take note.

Watch the Irishmen. Unions were created by mafias and don’t work. I’m surprised they still exist. Lawyers are scared to step on their toes. The lapse in time they use to pass the buck and not file a harassment grievance from one incident to the next is frustrating and infuriating.

This should be the first step, not the last in my opinion. Otherwise you will burn out. Meditation is a great way to relax and ease stress from harassment.

This should not be a last resort step. Especially if you’re in a unionized environment because the clock starts to tick the day you are aware of the abuse. Therefore you should actually report it right away. Don’t wait until the abuser continues to abuse you!