What are some ways to show empathy to someone from a different culture?

I'm from the US, but lived 18 years of my adult life in Thailand. I am in Thailand now. The cultures are radically different. So, yes, I can attest that it is very important to first have some basic understanding of the other culture. It is essential that you do not superimpose your own cultural values upon the situation. It is helpful if you have known the person with whom you are speaking for a while and that person considers you a friend. If you can do nothing else, just carefully listen. Comment and ask questions that validate the feelings of the other person. I've been in this position. It is a very sensitive area.

First step is to get out of your comfort zone an get outside- TRAVEL! Traveling has been my essential tool in understanding different cultures empathetically. It allowed me to immerse myself in unfamiliar environments, engage with local customs, and truly appreciate the nuances of diverse societies. Hands-on experience fosters empathy and enables you to see the world through the eyes of others. It's a powerful tool for breaking down stereotypes and forging genuine connections, as it emphasizes our shared humanity rather than our differences. While the modern technology is surreal and accessible, nothing beats the actual experience of being physically present somewhere for the first time in your life!

To show empathy to someone who is from a different culture, become curious about what what they are going through. Showing interest and asking empathic questions which open the conversation up to emotional content helps people feel safe to reveal how they feel. Once this happens, there is an empathic opportunity, which we can respond to. Staying mindfully present with our own emotions helps immensely. The practice of relational mindfulness (otherwise known as interpersonal mindfulness) is wonderfully supportive for increasing our empathic ability, even under uncertain or challenging circumstances.

So true! And, there are so many parallels to today's business DEI landscape in the USA. In the inclusion space, as a white male executive - I have often been asked about allyship and what is the most important soft skill you can have. Hands down, genuine active listening. The close second that goes hand in hand with active listening is an authentic interest in learning, understanding, and/or curiosity about the other's culture. The combination of authentic willingness to learn and understand coupled with actively listening produces a combination where it's hard to be performed as disrespectful. Even if you do miss a step and say the wrong words - your genuine willingness to learn and efforts of sincerity will overpower any miss step.

Empathy does not just mean attention to negative emotions and experiences. Perhaps the real test of empathy of whether you can share in other's joy and celebrate other's accomplishments. Especially if these accomplishments overtake yours. It is not unusual for people from more privileged backgrounds to be comfortable with people from less privileged backgrounds when they can play a manager/mentor/big sibling role, but feel uncomfortable or even threatened when those from less advantaged backgrounds shine brighter or "overtake" the more privileged person in their accomplishments.

When I engage in active listening during conversations where individuals share insights about their culture and customs, I've discovered the value of identifying commonalities between their culture and my own. It's truly surprising to realize that, despite vast geographical distances, many cultures share more similarities with mine than differences. This shared foundation can foster trust in our relationships, as it conveys a sense of understanding rather than highlighting differences. This approach encourages people to be more open and share their perspectives, facilitating mutual learning and improving communication across all levels.

I find when working with people from different cultures, you have to sacrifice your own thoughts and feelings to truly empathise with someone. That is the only way you can put yourself in their shoes- by setting aside what is yours to take on someone else’s. This is tied to serving others before ourselves, respect for someone else’s point of view or circumstances, and integrity, by doing what is right for that individual, not just the easy thing of saying “I am sorry” and moving on with your day. You must have humility to demonstrate empathy.

One thing I found helpful is finding a mentor from a different background and culture. It brings fresh perspectives and insights, enriching your understanding of the culture you're in. Actively seeking feedback is key – it demonstrates your commitment to learning. You have to be ready for the good, bad and ugly and receive the feedback empathetically, as it shows respect for their viewpoint. Be ready to kiss the old ways goodbye, especially if they are not doing you any favors in the present nor setting you up for the future. This way you will enhance your cultural awareness and be able to nurture inclusive, meaningful relationships while fostering your personal and professional growth.

Beware of patronizing bias. Too often, advice is provided with an assumption that a "different" culture is somehow a "lesser" culture. This in itself is a major obstacle to experiencing empathy.