What do you do if your emotional intelligence is lacking and you want to grow and develop through feedback?

1 Seek Feedback

When you're aware that your emotional intelligence needs improvement, actively seeking feedback is a crucial first step. Approach people you trust—colleagues, friends, or mentors—and ask for honest insights into how you handle emotions, both yours and others'. Be specific in your request; instead of asking whether you're good with people, inquire about how you manage conflict or show empathy. Embrace the discomfort that may come with this process; it's a sign of growth.

2 Reflect Deeply

Once you receive feedback, take the time to reflect on it deeply. Don't rush to justify your actions or dismiss the comments. Instead, consider the perspectives offered and how they align with your self-perception. Reflecting helps you identify patterns in your behavior that may not serve you well and can illuminate areas where your emotional responses could be more effective. This self-examination is a cornerstone of improving your emotional intelligence.

3 Set Goals

With insights from feedback and reflection, set specific goals for enhancing your emotional intelligence. These should be clear, achievable, and focused on areas that will make the most significant impact. For instance, if you've learned that you struggle with empathy, you might aim to ask more open-ended questions in conversations to better understand others' perspectives. Goal setting turns the abstract concept of EI into concrete actions.

4 Practice Consistently

Improvement in emotional intelligence won't happen overnight; it requires consistent practice. Work on your EI goals daily, and seek out situations that challenge you to use these skills. This might involve engaging in difficult conversations, offering support to a colleague, or simply being more mindful of your emotional reactions throughout the day. Remember, practice is as much about learning from what goes wrong as celebrating what goes right.

5 Seek Support

Building emotional intelligence is not a solitary journey. Seek out support from those who can help you stay on track and provide additional perspectives. This can be a professional coach, a trusted friend, or a peer group. Their encouragement and advice can be invaluable as you navigate the complexities of emotional growth. Moreover, they can offer accountability, helping you to stay committed to your goals.

6 Evaluate Progress

Finally, regularly evaluate your progress. This doesn't mean just looking for improvements but also recognizing where you still face challenges. Self-assessment and continued feedback from others will show you how far you've come and what areas still need attention. Celebrate your successes, no matter how small, and use setbacks as learning opportunities. This ongoing evaluation is crucial for sustained growth in emotional intelligence.

7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?