What do you do if your assertiveness is overshadowing empathy in customer retention interactions?

1 Identify your assertiveness style

Assertiveness is not a one-size-fits-all trait; different situations and customers may require different levels and types of assertiveness. Aggressive assertiveness involves dominating the conversation, interrupting, criticizing, or threatening the customer. Passive assertiveness is about avoiding the conversation, agreeing, apologizing, or giving in to the customer. Assertive assertiveness is engaging in the conversation, listening, expressing, and negotiating with the customer. None of these styles are inherently bad or good, but they can have different impacts on customer retention - aggressive assertiveness can damage trust and rapport, passive assertiveness can undermine credibility and value, and assertive assertiveness can build confidence and loyalty.

2 Assess your empathy level

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the customer's emotions, needs, and perspectives. It is a key component of customer retention, as it helps you to create rapport, trust, and loyalty with your customers. However, empathy is not always easy to demonstrate, especially when you are dealing with difficult, angry, or demanding customers. Generally, there are three levels of empathy: low, moderate, and high. Low empathy involves showing little or no interest in the customer's feelings or perspectives and focuses on facts and solutions. Moderate empathy shows some interest in the customer's feelings and attempts to balance facts and solutions with emotional aspects. High empathy involves expressing a lot of interest in the customer's feelings and expressing them verbally and non-verbally. While none of these levels are inherently bad or good, they can have different impacts on customer retention. Low empathy can make customers feel unheard or unappreciated; moderate empathy can make customers feel heard or understood; high empathy can make customers feel connected or valued.

3 Adjust your assertiveness and empathy accordingly

Finding the optimal balance of assertiveness and empathy in customer interactions depends on various factors, such as the customer's personality, mood, expectations, and goals, as well as the nature, purpose, and stage of the interaction. There is no fixed formula for finding the right balance, but there are some general guidelines to consider. If you are too aggressive, try to tone down your assertiveness and increase your empathy by listening more, interrupting less, asking open-ended questions, using positive language, and showing appreciation and respect for the customer's feelings and opinions. On the other hand, if you are too passive, try to boost your assertiveness while maintaining your empathy. Speak up, state your opinions confidently, offer solutions, use confident language, and demonstrate competence and value for your own feelings and opinions. Finally, if you are assertive already, try to match your empathy level with the customer's by observing their verbal and non-verbal cues, mirroring their tone and pace, empathizing with their emotions, and validating their needs and perspectives.

5 Learn from others

One of the best ways to learn how to balance assertiveness and empathy in customer retention interactions is to learn from others who do it well. You can observe and model your colleagues, mentors, or leaders who have excellent customer retention skills, and ask them for tips and advice. You can also read books, articles, blogs, or podcasts that feature successful customer retention stories, strategies, and best practices. You can also join online or offline communities, forums, or groups that focus on customer retention, and exchange ideas and experiences with other professionals.

Customer retention is not a matter of being either assertive or empathetic, but of being both in the right proportions. By following these tips, you can develop your assertiveness and empathy skills, and use them to create positive and lasting relationships with your customers.

6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?