What do you do if assertiveness is causing tension between software project managers and their team members?

It depends on the circumstances. So much of what a project manager should be doing is context based. By that I mean that they should be adjusting their approach to the circumstances in front of them in order to achieve the best outcomes for the project. Sometimes playing good cop, sometimes bad cop. At times assertiveness by project managers can ruffle feathers with the team. It can be seen as being demanding, authoritarian, unreasonable and stepping on toes. Project managers though should be assertive. Most of the time this can be avoided or ameliorated by a project manager choosing the right approach for the situation. Putting their ego aside in order to focus on the result.

While assertiveness is generally seen as a positive trait in a project manager, it can sometimes be perceived as aggressive or overbearing if not handled delicately. Consider seeking to understand the reasons behind the tension. Are team members feeling overwhelmed by your assertiveness? Do they feel unheard or disempowered? It's important to listen to their perspectives and concerns without becoming defensive.

Consider reflecting on your own communication style and behaviours. Are you being too forceful in your directives or decisions? Are you allowing space for open dialogue and collaboration? Adjusting your approach to be more receptive to input from team members can help alleviate tension and foster a more productive working environment.

Building trust is essential in resolving tension; by demonstrating empathy, respect, and transparency in your interactions with team members, you can show that you value their contributions and perspectives. This might involve acknowledging mistakes, apologizing for any unintended offense, and actively soliciting feedback to improve communication and collaboration.

In my experience, you can do a few things once you lose your team's confidence. Unfortunately, your leadership was compromised. Acctually, most of the time I've found natural leaders on my teams. Those are the ones that you can work with to rebuild your team's trustworthiness. But, if he or she has another agenda, my friend, you are in trouble. One thing that you can do is use Rihanna techniques (it just popped out of my mind) ), and let your team shine bright like a Diamond. Finally, if it does not work leave the project or start to set up a new team.

By the end of the day, what is important in a leadership position? If you thought people you are 100% right. The main role of someone in a leadership position is to take care of people. Once, you understand that you will realize that no matter what happens during your turn you must have to control your beast. One suggestion could be to foster a spiritual mindset, read books, and become more humble as you can.

One thing I've found helpful is to set a hierarchy where your superior supports your decisions because if the team realizes that your boss has no confidence in your work you will be in turmoil.