How does self-compassion help you cope with feedback and criticism?

I agree to this, additionally, knowing the self compassion is not being selfish. Self-compassion is actually helps you to understand you more and love inward. I know its not easy to do that. When self-compassion is the focus of development for yourself, rather than self-esteem, one's sense of self-worth tends to increase and is no longer a point of consistent evaluation. Self-compassion helps in recognition and acceptance of one own flaw which can lead to growth and personal development in a way that self-esteem does not.

Knowing and understanding yourself is in my humble opinion, some thing that each one of us needs to work hard to pursue. It is not an easy but a crucial quest. Once you know and understand who you are, then the possibility to develop yourself and become a better version of you becomes a project. At this point, anything anyone says to you, good or bad, will be welcomed graciously towards yourself. Knowing yourself gives you an advantage or shields you from outside influences. But also, it gives you space to intentionally work on yourself.

One thing that I have found to be helpful is self-acceptance and trusting myself. When I know that I have given my very best in all that I do and I feel complete and secure in the way I show up in the world, I can accept myself in that very moment. I trust I am my best self. The work I put out, the actions I take, and the words I speak, have come from the highest part of me. I know that I am always operating from a space of integrity. Therefore it is easy to come into alignment with self-compassion and love regardless of any possible negative feedback.

When exploring the importance of self-compassion, one must consider the other side of the coin: self-criticism and condemnation. Many of us grew up with well-meaning but critical parents. In striving to help us improve in life, they may have installed a critical voice in our heads that is still living there, quietly, insidiously condemning us for anything shy of perfection. Scan for it. If you find this, like I did, you can start to challenge it. Replace critical thoughts with kind sentiments. Make lists of accomplishments. When you reset the environment in your mind to be one of acceptance, life gets easier, more fun! You'll heal faster and find it's a lot easier to offer compassion to others when you first gift it to yourself.

I think it's important to see any experience as a learning experience. Aristotle said “There is only one way to avoid criticism: do nothing, say nothing, and be nothing” So I try to be objective and see where things went wrong. Did I still focus on the same objective? Did I involve and consult with the right people? And I try to learn and not doubt myself.

Self-compassion is also loving yourself ?? as you are with all of your perceived imperfections. It is sometimes much easier to love others and not take time to love ourselves. Take the time to build your relationship with yourself. You are worth it!??

If you are struggling with self compassion role play with yourself. Pretend a friend is telling you the story you are telling yourself. What would you tell them? Now, take your own advice!

For me the most important aspect of self compassion, no matter the situation, is allowing myself to feel the feelings that come up for me - without judging. I really believe that acceptance without judgement is the secret to self compassion.

Self-compassion is a daily practice that you can integrate into your routine. When you start to jump to negative conclusions or catastrophize after receiving feedback, pause and challenge those thoughts. We often make negative self-judgments based on assumptions versus evidence. Are there facts that back up the conclusions that you’re coming to? What’s another explanation? For example, if you’re telling yourself that you’re incompetent because your boss told you to strengthen a skill set, write out evidence that is against that conclusion that you’re incompetent. What are your specific strengths/skills? What’s positive feedback that you’ve received? This will provide you a more balanced view of the situation.

For my readers, I also wanted to share a personal anecdote. Many years back, I was given critical feedback by my then Skip manager on how I need to stop "Standing out" In every conversation and also become more self-aware. Let me tell you, for many days, I couldn't sleep. I started having self-doubts, questioning each and every word of mine. It took me some time to get the courage and talk to my sponsor that time to do some self-reflection on the specific examples provided as I always take feedback as a gift if it's given with right intentions and for the success and growth of the person. But once I reflected and gave myself some self-compassion, that same feedback moved into more of my strength while balancing it out based on the audience.