How does goal setting contribute to a stronger sense of self-worth?

From goals to a 'preferred future' Instead of working towards specific goals ask what difference reaching these goals would make to the persons life. Work towards creating that difference (eg more confidence) and the goals will look after themselves. In Solution Focused Coaching we create the conditions for goal-achievement. Dan wanted to be better at presentations, this would make him feel more confident at work. Asking him to describe a day at work with this confidence led not only to him becoming an excellent presenter but also happier both at work and at home. It changed his way of thinking about life and his way of doing life, a much more powerful change than just doing a traditional step-by-step approach to achieving a specific goal.

Achievement and Progress: As you accomplish goals, even small ones, you experience a sense of achievement, boosting your confidence and self-esteem. Personal Growth: Working towards goals requires developing skills and overcoming challenges, which fosters personal growth and resilience. Value Alignment: Goals aligned with your personal values reinforce your identity and what you stand for, enhancing your self-worth. Motivation and Drive: Goals provide motivation and a sense of control over your future, contributing to a more positive self-view. Recognition and Validation: Achieving goals often leads to external recognition, which can further affirm your abilities and worth.

Achieving milestones builds up your self-confidence, and a positive outlook. It gives you that "I can do this attitude" Every goal achieved makes you realize that you are capable of more than you think and that's where your self-confidence kicks in to help you create more obtainable goals.

At your best James wanted help to work out strategies for a crucial board meeting the next day. He needed to be at his best but had lost confidence. James was asked to describe his day from waking up to walking into the boardroom if it was a day when he was at his best. He would get straight up when the alarm rang at 7, kiss his wife, make coffee, wake his children up gently and sit down to breakfast, give family members a hug, drive considerately, chat to the receptionist, smile at colleagues, be purposeful about his routine work of the day, help a colleague with a difficult situation and walk into the boardroom with friendly confidence. The outcome was reported in the financial press and was worth several million to my client.

When setting goals you realize once some of these are accomplished you are on a behaviour change of personal growth and discovery. You are open to learning new skills and you know your capable of achieving more with that added confidence boost.

in Solution Focused Coaching we aim not for personal growth but for the client's hoped-for outcome. However, we expand that outcome by asking "What difference?" questions (eg what difference would it make if you could be more assertive with x? I would feel I was doing a better job; what difference would that make? I'd be much happier at work; and what difference would that make? I'd be happier at home as well). This meta-outcome, if it can be achieved will provide a 'home' for all the solutions the client is seeking. In Solution Focused Coaching we would elicit a detailed description of being happy at work and at home. We would then look for ways some of this was already happening. The client might 'grow' but that would be incidental.

Having that social circle of people that believe in you more than you believe in yourself gives you that extra confidence boost. Its like having your own fan club cheering for you and how this makes you feel is second to none.

Reflecting on your goals helps you to practice gratitude. Gratitude plays an important part when knowing are your goals achievable? have they been achieved? what's worked well? Is there anything you could work on? Being thankful for being able to achieve the milestones you have hit and what has helped you get there?

In my journey as a business coach, I vividly recall a client who struggled with self-worth due to unclear goals. By breaking down their aspirations into achievable milestones, they not only gained clarity and direction but also experienced significant personal growth. This process not only enhanced their confidence but also garnered social recognition, reinforcing their sense of self-worth. Reflective practice played a crucial role, allowing them to see their progress and celebrate small victories, thereby fostering a stronger, more resilient self-image.