How do you manage conflict and disagreement among cross-team members?
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The first step to manage conflict and disagreement is to assess the situation and understand the root causes, the impact, and the emotions involved. You can use the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) to identify your preferred style of dealing with conflict and how it may affect the outcome. The TKI categorizes conflict styles into five types: competing, collaborating, compromising, avoiding, and accommodating. Depending on the situation, you may need to adjust your style to match the needs and expectations of the other parties.
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To effectively manage conflict, consider these steps: Assess the Specific Conflict: Understand its unique context, stakeholders, and issues to tailor the resolution strategy. Prioritize Effective Communication: Highlight the importance of open, honest, and empathetic communication in resolving conflicts. Customize Resolution Strategies: Utilize frameworks like the TKI but adapt strategies to the specific situation for optimal results. View Conflict as a Catalyst: Embrace conflict as an opportunity for growth and improvement, fostering innovation and progress. Seek Expertise: Collaborate with professionals experienced in conflict resolution and organizational improvement if additional support is needed.
The second step to manage conflict and disagreement is to communicate respectfully and clearly with the cross-team members. You can use the STAR model to structure your communication and avoid misunderstandings. The STAR model consists of four elements: situation, task, action, and result. You can use this model to describe the context, the goal, the steps, and the outcome of the issue or project you are working on. You can also use active listening, paraphrasing, and open-ended questions to show interest, empathy, and curiosity.
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In my consulting business, my clients and vendors are my cross-team members. They deserve respect and they earn that respect. No one gets it automatically. Sometimes they need updated education about a topic that they took for granted, and with patience of explanation in the right tone, some illustrative graphics, and face-to-face zoom chats, we can collectively make all the difference between success and failure. My goal is to be sure everyone walks away at a higher level of appreciation of how we all collaborate to reach the end goal. Onward always.
The third step to manage conflict and disagreement is to seek common ground and find areas of agreement or alignment. You can use the interest-based approach to focus on the underlying needs, interests, and values of the cross-team members, rather than their positions or demands. You can also use the brainstorming technique to generate multiple options and solutions that can satisfy all parties. You can then use the criteria-based method to evaluate and select the best option based on agreed-upon criteria.
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I also believe that finding the similarities versus the differences in people/ideas is key to coming to mutual agreements and less conflict. As you mentioned, focusing on each other ideas in a non-confrontational setting and utilizing active listening skills are crucial in being able to come to an understanding. Especially now, working remotely and communicating through technology allows people to read into a tone/idea that is not factual, allowing people to make assumptions based on thought versus fact, which will affect the outcome of a project/program and has the potential to knock it off its deadline. Having these conversations early is vital for any issues.
The fourth step to manage conflict and disagreement is to manage your own emotions and help others manage theirs. You can use the emotional intelligence framework to recognize, understand, and regulate your emotions and those of others. You can also use the RAIN technique to cope with negative emotions and reactions. The RAIN technique consists of four steps: recognize, accept, investigate, and non-identify. You can use this technique to acknowledge, accept, explore, and detach from your emotions without being overwhelmed or controlled by them.
The fifth step to manage conflict and disagreement is to build trust and rapport with the cross-team members. You can use the Tuckman model to understand the stages of team development and the challenges and opportunities they present. The Tuckman model describes four stages: forming, storming, norming, and performing. You can use this model to guide your actions and behaviors to foster a positive and productive team culture. You can also use the feedback loop to give and receive constructive feedback and improve your performance and relationships.
The sixth and final step to manage conflict and disagreement is to learn and improve from the experience and apply the lessons learned to future situations. You can use the after-action review (AAR) method to reflect on what happened, what worked well, what didn't work well, and what can be done better next time. You can also use the SMART goals framework to set specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound goals for yourself and your cross-team members. You can then track your progress and celebrate your achievements.
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