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How do you foster a trusting and supportive relationship with your coachee or mentee?

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As a coach or mentor, you want to help your coachee or mentee grow and achieve their goals. But to do that, you need to build a trusting and supportive relationship with them. How can you use emotional intelligence to foster such a relationship? Here are some tips to guide you.

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1 Listen actively

One of the most important skills of emotional intelligence is active listening. Active listening means paying attention to what the other person is saying, not just the words, but also the tone, body language, and emotions. It also means asking open-ended questions, reflecting back what you heard, and summarizing the key points. Active listening shows that you care, respect, and understand your coachee or mentee, and that you are genuinely interested in their perspective and experience.

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Joshua Freedman

Building trust-centered leadership, teams & organizations where people can be & do their best. MCC, CEO of Six Seconds - the global emotional intelligence community
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Hmmm, this article is pretty thin on substance so far. Before we get to the action steps / what to do… let’s talk about who to be. As a coach (not the same thing as mentor), I’m choosing to be an equal partner w my clients. To be that, I choose to be fully present, connected, awake. The way I listen grows from that. It’s not just about words, in fact it’s mostly not. When I’m in coach-mode, I’m super-tuned-in to emotions. Mine too. My emotions are constantly giving me clues about my client’s emotions. Sometimes we talk about feelings, but even if we’re talking about financial models or growth strategies, I’m still ‘hearing’ the emotions. I didn’t used to, I used to be scared of emotions… but 25 years with Six Seconds transformed that.

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George Anderson MSW, LCSW, BCD, CAMF

Emotional Intelligence Coach
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Training and experience in Emotional Intelligence must begin with an EQ-i-2.0 Assessment, coaching and training prior to offering services to others. Ideally, persons who wish to coach others must also have training and licensure in counseling or psychotherapy. I have provided Emotional Intelligence Coaching and assessment for distruptive behavior, burnout and leadership coaching for physicians in the U.S. and Saudi Arabia. I have published three books on Anger Management/disruptive behavior for adolescents , adults and executives.

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2 Empathize sincerely

Another key skill of emotional intelligence is empathy. Empathy means being able to put yourself in the other person's shoes and feel what they feel. It also means acknowledging and validating their feelings, without judging or dismissing them. Empathy helps you to connect with your coachee or mentee on a deeper level, and to show them that you are on their side. Empathy also helps you to tailor your feedback and guidance to their needs and preferences, and to avoid hurting or offending them.

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Nile Harris

Equipping Life Science innovators to actualize strategy, accelerate results, and cultivate high-performing leaders + everyday warriors ??
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Five years ago, I received some valuable feedback that made me re-evaluate how I empathize with others. I used to bring my own experiences into conversations as a way to connect, but I learned that this can be irritating for people. Now, I make a conscious effort to actively listen to others and respond with statements like "I hear you" or "I understand what you're saying." I never assume to know exactly how someone feels. It's important to recognize that everyone's experiences are unique and valid. By practicing active listening and avoiding the urge to relate everything back to my own experiences,

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3 Communicate clearly

A third skill of emotional intelligence is clear communication. Clear communication means expressing yourself in a way that is easy to understand, respectful, and appropriate for the situation. It also means being honest, transparent, and consistent in your words and actions. Clear communication helps you to establish trust and credibility with your coachee or mentee, and to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. Clear communication also helps you to set clear expectations and boundaries, and to give constructive and positive feedback.

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4 Support positively

A fourth skill of emotional intelligence is positive support. Positive support means providing encouragement, motivation, and recognition to your coachee or mentee. It also means being flexible, adaptable, and resourceful in helping them overcome challenges and achieve their goals. Positive support helps you to boost your coachee or mentee's confidence, self-esteem, and resilience, and to celebrate their successes and learn from their failures. Positive support also helps you to create a safe and comfortable environment for learning and growth.

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5 Learn continuously

A fifth skill of emotional intelligence is continuous learning. Continuous learning means being open to feedback, new ideas, and different perspectives. It also means being humble, curious, and reflective. Continuous learning helps you to improve your own skills and knowledge as a coach or mentor, and to model a growth mindset for your coachee or mentee. Continuous learning also helps you to adapt to changing needs and situations, and to keep your relationship fresh and engaging.

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6 Respect diversity

A sixth skill of emotional intelligence is respecting diversity. Respecting diversity means acknowledging and appreciating the differences and similarities between you and your coachee or mentee. It also means being inclusive, respectful, and culturally sensitive. Respecting diversity helps you to build rapport and trust with your coachee or mentee, and to avoid stereotypes and biases. Respecting diversity also helps you to leverage the strengths and opportunities that diversity brings, and to foster a sense of belonging and empowerment.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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How do you foster a trusting and supportive relationship with your coachee or mentee?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Listen actively

2 Empathize sincerely

3 Communicate clearly

4 Support positively

5 Learn continuously

6 Respect diversity

7 Here’s what else to consider

Emotional Intelligence

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How do you foster a trusting and supportive relationship with your coachee or mentee?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Listen actively

2 Empathize sincerely

3 Communicate clearly

4 Support positively

5 Learn continuously

6 Respect diversity

7 Here’s what else to consider

Emotional Intelligence

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