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How do you coach employees with low emotional intelligence scores?

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Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to understand and manage your own and others' emotions, and to use them effectively in various situations. EI is crucial for building positive relationships, communicating effectively, and coping with stress and challenges at work. However, not everyone has a high level of EI, and some employees may struggle with low EI scores that affect their performance and well-being. How do you coach employees with low EI scores and help them improve their emotional skills? Here are some tips to guide you.

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1 Assess their EI level

The first step is to assess the current EI level of your employees, using a reliable and valid tool such as the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT) or the Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i 2.0). These tests measure different aspects of EI, such as perceiving, using, understanding, and managing emotions. By identifying the strengths and weaknesses of your employees' EI, you can tailor your coaching approach to their specific needs and goals.

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Kristen Brun Sharkey

Unlocking your potential with improv-infused leadership coaching, facilitation and speaking | ??? Podcast Host - Love and Leadership
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For employees who struggle with EI I usually find that an assessment is essential. Often they have a very different idea of their EI compared to what others think, or they may underestimate its importance. An assessment can help with both of these. My preferred assessment suite for this is from Genos. I like that they include importance as a measure, and they offer opportunities for peers, manager and direct reports to give feedback as well. It's just critical to have someone doing the debrief who is certified in these assessments, since the conversations can be tricky sometimes.

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2 Provide feedback and support

The second step is to provide constructive and supportive feedback to your employees, based on their EI assessment results. Feedback should be specific, timely, and balanced, highlighting both the areas of improvement and the areas of excellence. You should also acknowledge the efforts and progress of your employees, and encourage them to keep working on their EI skills. Moreover, you should offer your support and guidance, and create a safe and trusting environment where your employees can express their emotions, ask questions, and seek help.

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Mollie C.

Head of Cyber Defence | Chief Advisor at Women in Cybersecurity UKI
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I don't think you can just "teach" emotional intelligence right off the bat. To have emotional intelligence you must first work on developing self-awareness and self-reflection - essential groundwork.

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3 Teach EI strategies and skills

The third step is to teach your employees some effective EI strategies and skills that they can apply in their daily work. For example, you can teach them how to use self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy, and social skills to handle different scenarios, such as giving and receiving feedback, resolving conflicts, collaborating with others, managing stress, and making decisions. You can use various methods, such as role-playing, case studies, videos, exercises, and games, to demonstrate and practice these skills.

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Mollie C.

Head of Cyber Defence | Chief Advisor at Women in Cybersecurity UKI
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Self-awareness can be "taught", but even if it can be learnt later in life, it doesn't happen overnight. It takes a LOT of reflection to know and accept the most basic let alone the deepest parts of ourselves, which is needed to begin to understand others. The key is to start small, with reflection and active-listening activities.

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4 Model EI behaviors and attitudes

The fourth step is to model the EI behaviors and attitudes that you want your employees to adopt and emulate. As a coach, you should set a positive example of how to use EI in your own work, and show your employees how it benefits you and others. You should also show genuine interest and care for your employees, and respect their feelings and opinions. By doing so, you can inspire and motivate your employees to improve their EI, and build a stronger rapport with them.

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5 Monitor and evaluate progress

The fifth step is to monitor and evaluate the progress of your employees' EI development, using both quantitative and qualitative measures. You can use the same EI tests that you used in the first step, or other tools, such as surveys, interviews, or observations, to track the changes and improvements in your employees' EI scores and behaviors. You should also solicit feedback from your employees, and ask them to reflect on their learning experiences, challenges, and achievements. Based on the results, you can adjust your coaching plan and strategies accordingly.

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6 Celebrate and reinforce success

The sixth and final step is to celebrate and reinforce the success of your employees' EI improvement, and acknowledge their efforts and achievements. You can use various ways, such as rewards, recognition, praise, or testimonials, to show your appreciation and gratitude to your employees, and to boost their confidence and satisfaction. You should also encourage your employees to continue practicing and developing their EI skills, and to apply them in different contexts and situations. By doing so, you can help your employees sustain and enhance their EI, and reap the benefits of it in their work and life.

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Mollie C.

Head of Cyber Defence | Chief Advisor at Women in Cybersecurity UKI
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Ensure you encourage individuals to recognise small wins as much as the bigger wins. We all have a tendency to only recognise ourselves or others for the obvious things.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Christelle Pillot

?? Passionate Career Shift Coach | Empowering International Women | Ex Chemical Engineer | Speaker & Author | Ambidextrous??♀? | Mom of 3 ?? | Let's connect for impactful conversations over coffee ?
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In my experience, Sharing specific examples helps them to understand how their emotional intelligence affects their interactions and work environment. But the first step in coaching employees with low emotional intelligence requires a tailored and empathetic approach. I would process it this way: I would first encourage self-reflection, and ask open-ended questions to help them explore the reasons behind their actions so that they understand what might be causing issues and the impact these behaviors have on their colleagues, team dynamics, and overall work environment. Only then, I would introduce Emotional Intelligence and suggest an EI Assessment. That would follow with Customized Coaching Plan.

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How do you coach employees with low emotional intelligence scores?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Assess their EI level

2 Provide feedback and support

3 Teach EI strategies and skills

4 Model EI behaviors and attitudes

5 Monitor and evaluate progress

6 Celebrate and reinforce success

7 Here’s what else to consider

Emotional Intelligence

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How do you coach employees with low emotional intelligence scores?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Assess their EI level

2 Provide feedback and support

3 Teach EI strategies and skills

4 Model EI behaviors and attitudes

5 Monitor and evaluate progress

6 Celebrate and reinforce success

7 Here’s what else to consider

Emotional Intelligence

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