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How can you use mindful questioning to elicit deeper insights from others?

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Mindful questioning is a skill that can help you gain deeper insights from others, whether you are coaching, mentoring, interviewing, or simply having a conversation. It involves asking open-ended, curious, and non-judgmental questions that invite the other person to explore their thoughts, feelings, and perspectives. In this article, you will learn how to use mindful questioning to elicit deeper insights from others, and how to avoid common pitfalls that can hinder effective communication.

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Arti Halai

Executive Coach | Trailblazing Women become Confident Communicators | Media, Communication & Confidence Coaching |…

1 What is mindful questioning?

Mindful questioning is a way of asking questions that is based on mindfulness, which is the practice of paying attention to the present moment with curiosity and acceptance. Mindful questioning aims to create a space where the other person feels heard, understood, and valued, and where they can discover new insights about themselves and their situation. Mindful questioning is not about leading, persuading, or solving problems for the other person, but rather about supporting their own learning and growth.

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Arti Halai

Executive Coach | Trailblazing Women become Confident Communicators | Media, Communication & Confidence Coaching | Ex-ITV | Let’s talk DM me
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Mindful questioning requires really trying to find out what is going on for the other person through their thoughts, feelings and actions. It requires empathy and active listening skills. Asking the right type of questions - in the right way can really help the other person to see their current situation for what it is and take positive steps forward.

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2 Why is mindful questioning important?

Mindful questioning is important because it can help you build rapport, trust, and empathy with the other person, and foster a deeper and more meaningful connection. Mindful questioning can also help you avoid assumptions, biases, and misunderstandings that can interfere with effective communication. By asking mindful questions, you can show genuine interest and respect for the other person's views and experiences, and encourage them to share more openly and honestly. Mindful questioning can also help you learn more about the other person's needs, goals, challenges, and motivations, and how you can best support them.

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3 How to ask mindful questions?

To ask mindful questions, you need to be mindful yourself. This means being fully present, attentive to the other person, and listening with an open mind and heart. You also need to be aware of your own thoughts, feelings, and reactions, and how they might influence your questions. Here are some tips on how to ask mindful questions: Open-ended questions that start with what, how, or why can be better than closed-ended questions that can be answered with yes or no. Make sure the questions are relevant, specific, and clear; curious, exploratory, and reflective; and respectful, supportive, and empowering. For example, instead of asking "Do you like your job?", ask "What do you like about your job?" or "How do you feel about your job?". And instead of asking "Why did you do that?", ask "What was your intention behind that?" or "What did you learn from that?".

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Arti Halai

Executive Coach | Trailblazing Women become Confident Communicators | Media, Communication & Confidence Coaching | Ex-ITV | Let’s talk DM me
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Whilst I agree that open ended questions are better to use to get information, gain better insight or explore something further, closed questions can really help you to ensure you’ve understood the other person’s answer properly. So you can paraphrase like this for example - “am I right - is this what you are saying…”

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4 How to avoid common pitfalls?

Asking mindful questions can be difficult, and there are some common pitfalls that can prevent you from gaining deeper insights from others. To avoid asking too many questions or interrupting the other person, ask one question at a time and wait for the answer before asking another one. You can also use non-verbal cues to show your interest and attention and give the other person time to think. Leading questions, which imply a desired answer, should be avoided as they can make the other person feel manipulated or criticized. Neutral questions that don't reveal your opinion or agenda should be asked instead. Loaded questions, which contain hidden assumptions or judgments, should also be avoided as they can trigger negative emotions. Instead, factual questions that are based on observable evidence should be asked, as well as clarifying questions that ask for more information or explanation.

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5 How to practice mindful questioning?

To practice mindful questioning, incorporate it into your everyday interactions and reflect on your own experience and feedback. Additionally, consider reading books, articles, or blogs on mindful questioning, mindfulness or communication skills to gain insight into examples and tips. To further your understanding, watch videos, podcasts or webinars which utilize mindful questions to engage their audience. Additionally, join a group, course or workshop on mindful questioning and participate in the activities and exercises they offer. Finally, find a partner, mentor or coach who can practice with you and provide constructive feedback and support.

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Arti Halai

Executive Coach | Trailblazing Women become Confident Communicators | Media, Communication & Confidence Coaching | Ex-ITV | Let’s talk DM me
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I sometimes just like to watch other people in action - it can be anywhere like in meetings, casual conversations, social settings both in my professional and private life. You can learn a lot about good and bad practices from the types of questions and the way these questions are asked and the responses they receive.

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6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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How can you use mindful questioning to elicit deeper insights from others?

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1 What is mindful questioning?

2 Why is mindful questioning important?

3 How to ask mindful questions?

4 How to avoid common pitfalls?

5 How to practice mindful questioning?

6 Here’s what else to consider

Mindfulness

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How can you use mindful questioning to elicit deeper insights from others?

1

2

3

4

5

6

1 What is mindful questioning?

2 Why is mindful questioning important?

3 How to ask mindful questions?

4 How to avoid common pitfalls?

5 How to practice mindful questioning?

6 Here’s what else to consider

Mindfulness

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