How can you use email to de-escalate a tense situation?

1 Acknowledge the problem

The first step to de-escalate a tense situation over email is to acknowledge the problem and show empathy. Don't ignore or dismiss the other person's feelings or concerns. Instead, use phrases like "I understand your frustration", "I apologize for the inconvenience", or "I appreciate your feedback". This can help calm the other person down and make them feel heard and respected.

2 Clarify the facts

The second step to de-escalate a tense situation over email is to clarify the facts and avoid assumptions. Sometimes, email conflicts arise from misunderstandings, misinformation, or misinterpretation. To prevent further confusion, restate the main points of the issue, ask for clarification if needed, and provide evidence or examples to support your position. Use clear and concise language, avoid jargon or slang, and check your spelling and grammar.

3 Offer a solution

The third step to de-escalate a tense situation over email is to offer a solution and show willingness to cooperate. Don't focus on blaming or criticizing the other person. Instead, focus on finding a mutually beneficial outcome and propose concrete actions or steps to achieve it. Use phrases like "I suggest we do this", "I can help you with that", or "I would like to hear your thoughts on this". This can help build trust and rapport and show your professionalism and problem-solving skills.

4 Confirm the agreement

The fourth step to de-escalate a tense situation over email is to confirm the agreement and follow up. Don't leave the conversation hanging or unresolved. Instead, summarize the main points of the solution, thank the other person for their cooperation, and confirm the next steps or deadlines. Use phrases like "To recap, we agreed on this", "Thank you for your understanding", or "I will keep you updated on this". This can help ensure clarity and accountability and close the conversation on a positive note.

6 Seek feedback

The sixth step to de-escalate a tense situation over email is to seek feedback and learn from the experience. Don't repeat the same mistakes or ignore the underlying causes of the conflict. Instead, ask for feedback from the other person, your manager, or your peers on how you handled the situation and how you can improve your email communication skills. Use phrases like "I appreciate your honest feedback", "I welcome your suggestions", or "I value your input". This can help you grow and develop as an administrative assistant and avoid future email conflicts.

7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?