Conflicts often arise when people have different communication styles and preferences. How can you help parties in conflict appreciate and adapt to these differences? In this article, you will learn some mediation and facilitation techniques that can improve interpersonal communication and reduce misunderstandings.
The first step is to identify the communication styles of the parties involved. Communication styles are the ways people express themselves, listen, and respond to others. Some common communication styles are assertive, passive, aggressive, and passive-aggressive. Each style has its strengths and weaknesses, and can affect how others perceive and react to the message. By recognizing the communication styles of yourself and others, you can avoid assumptions and judgments, and tailor your approach accordingly.
The second step is to acknowledge and validate the feelings and perspectives of the parties in conflict. Acknowledging means showing that you hear and understand what the other person is saying, without agreeing or disagreeing. Validating means expressing respect and appreciation for the other person's views, even if they are different from yours. By acknowledging and validating, you can build rapport and trust, and reduce defensiveness and hostility.
The third step is to reframe and restate the issues and interests of the parties in conflict. Reframing means putting a positive or neutral spin on a negative or provocative statement, or finding a common ground or shared goal. Restating means summarizing or paraphrasing what the other person said, using your own words or different words. By reframing and restating, you can clarify misunderstandings, reduce emotional intensity, and highlight areas of agreement or cooperation.
The fourth step is to ask open-ended questions that encourage the parties in conflict to elaborate, explain, or explore their thoughts and feelings. Open-ended questions are questions that cannot be answered with a simple yes or no, or a short answer. They usually start with words like what, how, why, when, where, or who. By asking open-ended questions, you can invite dialogue, stimulate curiosity, and uncover underlying needs and motivations.
The fifth step is to listen actively to the parties in conflict. Active listening means paying full attention to what the other person is saying, without interrupting, judging, or distracting yourself. It also means using verbal and non-verbal cues to show that you are listening, such as nodding, making eye contact, or saying "mm-hmm" or "I see". By listening actively, you can demonstrate empathy, respect, and interest, and encourage the other person to open up and share more.
In the realm of conflict resolution, fostering understanding between parties with diverse communication styles is paramount. Acknowledging these differences and creating a safe space for dialogue is crucial. Active listening plays a pivotal role, going beyond mere words to grasp emotions and intentions. Encouraging active listening, with clarifying questions and paraphrasing, can bridge gaps and build trust. By promoting active listening and appreciating varied communication styles, we unlock the potential for harmonious interactions, both at work and in personal relationships.
The sixth step is to provide feedback to the parties in conflict. Feedback means giving your opinion, observation, or suggestion on what the other person said or did, in a constructive and respectful way. Feedback can be positive or negative, but it should always be specific, timely, and relevant. By providing feedback, you can reinforce what is working well, suggest what can be improved, and offer support or guidance.
Agree on how to meet, greet and treat each other. By investing time in a common understanding on what is good and bad behavior, and then commit to the agreement on how you act and communicate you will reduce potential conflicts and instead be more productive.