How can you handle difficult coaching conversations effectively?

The key is to start by reminding them of your shared goal to help them (and the company) succeed and leave plenty of room for curiosity and 2-way dialogue. Too many people head into difficult conversations with by focusing on everything that’s going wrong instead of focusing on the end destination. Instead, difficult conversations should start with language that makes clear the fact that you’re both on the same side: “You and I have both been eager to get you higher along the salary band. I want to see you get there, but it’s not happening today. Let’s talk about why, what steps we’ll need to take to get you there, and what questions or thoughts you have for me.”

Effective coach training should focus on handling challenging conversations, using case studies as examples. These conversations should take place in a private, comfortable setting, fostering growth and support. Coaches must practice active listening to build trust and clarity in discussing issues. They should focus on actions and outcomes, rather than personal traits, to avoid negative reactions. Emphasizing self-reflection helps in increasing daily self-awareness. It's vital to aim for cooperative problem-solving, provide clear expectations, and plan for follow-up. Maintaining confidentiality, respect, and composure is crucial. Finally, a positive approach can instill confidence and support in individuals.

We need to handle a tough coaching conversation by being empathetic, listening actively, and offering constructive feedback. Keep it natural and focus on finding solutions together. Understand the recipients perspective and before you soliutionise. Isolate the ‘Problem’ and NOT the ‘Person’.

1. Use different tools like PPT with animation 2. Make simple, which is difficult 3. Imagine, you are the listener and deliver with the listener's perspective. 4. Animate the complex thing to simple 5. Decide the depth of topic based on the audience requirements. 6. Interact to ensure the message has reached and understood in true sprit.

Before having any type of difficult conversation make sure that you are addressing the issue and not making it about you or the person. It is so easy to fall into the trap of labeling the issue as a difficult employee who always has an issue. Clearly evaluate the situation to identify if you have any biases with the issue and/or the person. If so, why? Stick to today's issue and not make it about yesterday. I used to teach Crucial Conversations and several things from this course come to mind: 1) What's your motivation for the conversation? and 2) What do you want for yourself, the other person and the relationship? Lastly, be kind. There may be unknown circumstances that are affecting the other party that may be at play.

Rather than simply delivering feedback and then "actively listening" for a response, encouraging a two-way dialogue ensures that both parties feel heard and understood. The coach should focus on specific behaviors or situations rather than making personal judgments, and collaboratively explore potential solutions. Additionally, helping individuals identify their own contributions to the issue fosters accountability and promotes a constructive path forward.

Attentively listening is a well-honed skill. To listen and hold space for another human being is a privilege. Listening to hear, not to respond. Allowing your own attention to be fully present. People know and feel when you are not paying attention. When we actively listen we have so many beautiful opportunities to connect to grow and foster a meaningful relationship.

Learning to actively and empathetically listen was challenging yet vital for me. It taught me the importance of being still, creating space for quiet, and not rushing to respond. This approach has not only benefited my coachees but also fueled my personal growth and learning.

There are different levels of listening: 1. Ignoring 2. Pretend listening 3. Selective listening 4. Active/Attentive listening 5. Empathetic listening You should stay in the level of active listening to be able to understand the other person and keep an open mindset to accept what the other person is saying. One thing that would encourage having an open mindset is Empathetic listening, this would allow you to connect with the person, understand their perspective and then being able to reach an agreement.

Mais uma vez, trazer aqui o ouvir genuino, entendendo as dores do outro é essenicial. Geralmente, quando a pessoa recebe um feedback duro ou que algo n?o está t?o legal, a primeira rea??o é a pessoa se justificar ou até em alguns casos reagir. Esteja aberto para esses pontos, mas saiba colocar limites. Ex.: Se a pessoa come?ar a dar feedbacks de atitudes suas para "justificar" algo que ela n?o vez, diga que está super aberto para receber esse feedback, mas que o ideal é separar as conversas.

The sandwich technique doesn’t work, don’t use it. It damages trust and everyone is aware what you’re trying to do, which is hide negative feedback behind positive, which in turns makes the positive feedback meaningless. Have separate conversations for positive and negative feedback, so your aim is clear. Also, feedback shouldn’t really have any place in a coaching conversation unless it is directly relevant to the coachee’s aims. Too often it’s crowbarred in when it isn’t necessary and again, trust is damaged and barriers created to progress.

Radical Candor has been a transformative approach in my experience. It emphasizes the importance of candid, clear, and direct communication while genuinely caring about the individual's growth. Radical Candor fosters a deeper level of trust and respect between the coach and the individual. In practice, I've found that Radical Candor encourages open and honest conversations. When individuals feel that their coach genuinely cares about their development and well-being, they are more receptive to feedback, even when it pertains to areas needing improvement. This approach promotes a growth mindset, where constructive feedback is seen as an opportunity for growth rather than criticism.

Summary Constructive feedback starts well before the need to deliver it Details It's natural we complain. About everything. If we have a bad experience, we complain. If someone does a mistake, we complain. The truth is that it's much easier to vent our frustrations (especially today in social media). How many times do we stop to praise someone? A good experience, a job well done? We must train ourselves to make it a habit. When you praise your team members genuinely frequently, you show that you are paying attention. It becomes stronger if you add a sentence or two highlighting the way they did it and how it contributed to a successful outcome. Then when it's time to provide a constructive feedback, they will seriously hear you. Go for it!

I've had the opportunity to be coached and shadow one of the most amazing trainers way back when I was barely 20-21 years old and in a coaching role myself. And in fact, also coaching folks who may have been elder in terms of age and or lead trainings about Coaching and Counseling to CXO level stakeholders. One of my biggest part of that learning was to be able to map constructive feedback from learnings of what could have been better, but always keep a clear distinction, (a sandwich technique) was more sugarcoated and may have worked before. But the best approach has always been, just do the Positives First and Areas of Opportunity last, and summarize, with follow up steps! Goes a long way, esp. if you Keep it Simple and Short as well!

The art of feedback is crucial in coaching. Expanding on the SBI model, it's essential to ground feedback in tangible events or situations, avoiding generalizations. By discussing specific behaviors and their impacts, it becomes less about personal traits and more about actions. This distinction can make feedback less confrontational. Another method is the "Ask-Advise" approach. Before offering solutions, ask coachees how they might address the issue. This engages them in problem-solving and can make advice more welcome. Additionally, while the sandwich method has its merits, it's important to ensure the positive feedback is genuine and not just fluff.

Additionally The handling of the emotions is the more difficult part and requires balancing between your rational observation of the person's performance and their emotional response to it. Prepare: - the person's interpersonal style, how may it affect their reaction and how do I have to adapt my style/language - does the person have a more fixed or growth mindset so what can you expect - your "Yes, and..." acknowledgement response on the objection or emotion Manage expectations: - before the session explain that coaching is meant to develop the skills and performance and means that both good as "need to develop" will be addressed. Sports acronyms may help - guarantee a safe environment; coaching is about development, not about assessment

I would include awareness of cultural differences that might impact communication styles and preferences. Especially when handling objection and emotions, tailoring our approach to be culturally sensitive and inclusive may make a huge difference.

In my experience sharing a bit of yourself and your journey can foster trust If you talk about your own vulnerability and lessons learned I have found that my learners respect my honesty that I have made mistakes. It makes us human to identify and share our own stories. It makes it real and relevant.

I agree that planned, fair feedback is crucial in coaching interactions. To enhance introspection and promote self-awareness, I frequently ask people to explain to me how they understand the Situation, Behavior, and Impact (SBI). In doing so, people are more likely to experience an "aha moment," in which they make the connection between their actions and the results. In addition to strengthening the takeaways gained, this reflective strategy encourages the coachee to take ownership of the feedback by actively engaging with the insights gained. It's an empowering step towards transformative improvement and aligns perfectly with actionable guidance.

Anticipate objections and emotions. This may be difficult if you do not know the person to whom you are providing feedback well enough. Preparation is key. Expect typical objections and what might be expected if they become upset, and prepare answers up front before your meeting to enhance your conversation and arrive at a win-win situation where you and your individual reach an understanding.

Absolutely crucial! Following up after a coaching conversation ensures clarity, accountability, and ongoing support. Summarizing key points reinforces expectations, scheduling next steps maintains momentum, and recognizing achievements boosts confidence. Consistent feedback and celebration of efforts contribute to a positive coaching relationship and continuous improvement. #skilldify #shivangisays

The post-conversation phase is as crucial as the conversation itself. Regular follow-ups not only show commitment but also ensure sustained change. To enhance this, it's beneficial to set clear timelines for when you'll touch base again, offering predictability. Moreover, it's essential to approach follow-ups as opportunities for continued dialogue, rather than mere check-ins. This dynamic fosters a sense of partnership. Implementing a feedback loop, where the coachee can share their thoughts about the coaching process itself, can also be enlightening. This invites them to voice concerns, share successes, or suggest alterations.

A favorite activity we practice on our team and encourage corporate clients to implement is personal accomplishment lists. For us, each team member identifies up to 10 accomplishments they’re proud of from the current quarter. Accomplishments can be professional or personal (e.g. Finally got the car fixed; Completed a major work project). Using this in coaching allows the coachee to monitor and celebrate their own achievements and, equally importantly, gives the coach insight into what’s important to the coachee.

follow ups should be seen as a support rather than supervisory . it should be casual conversation rather than interrogation session looking for their fault.

As with most things, it is imperative to follow up to ensure understanding and to allow the person to see how serious and caring you are in terms of the issue at hand.

Make sure you're in the right headspace and check what your true intention is. When I think about my own time in busy leadership roles, as well as working with lots of busy leaders now as an executive coach, I find that a trap is to go from meeting to meeting. And if those meetings run late or don't go well, there can be a cumulative effect where, by the time we get to the meeting to have a feedback conversation, we're frazzled and possibly low on patience and tolerance. Making sure you have time before a feedback conversation to get in the right headspace is key. Even 5 minutes of focused breathing and intention setting can help.

Empathy, clarity, and constructive communication - navigating difficult coaching conversations often requires a blend of these three. Creating a safe space for dialogue is the 1st and most important step. Then listening actively to understand concerns, and expressing empathy - providing specific feedback, focusing on behaviors rather than personal attributes. Collaboratively explore solutions, encouraging the coachee's input. Maintaining a positive tone and emphasising growth, turning challenges into opportunities. Ending the conversation on a forward-looking note, reinforcing your belief in their potential and the shared commitment to improvement always helps.

Alot of those who are categorized at difficult are usually those who need effective support. Putting an effective plan and communicate the plan effectively with effective follow ups.

A coaching conversation is different from a typical conversation in which advice or help is given in solving a problem. Active listening and using "ad rem" conversational strategies can help you take responsibility for your role in a situation, identify what went wrong and discuss any impacts objectively. Before you start a tough conversation, take time to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally. Practice is especially useful if you know that you tend to get angry or upset when you are having difficult talks. To make sure your communication is effective, remember the 5C model: Clarity, Conciseness, Consistency, Connection, Confidence; they can form the framework for a coaching session or sessions, where time is spent focusing on each “C”.

Coaching requires a genuine effort to help or enable the coachee to look at the situation with different perspectives and understand. The moment the coach is able to come up with a facilitator approach, it helps the coachee to open up, acknowledge and prepare to change. To be able to carry out the conversation, the coach first needs to prepare and be very clear on the objective of the conversation. Authentic listening, providing a spacious silence, having a respectful and meaningful conversation or dialogue, avoid being judgemental and a genuine attempt builds trust. Identify and help the coachee to own the actionable, invest time to check on emotions, no personal attack but a very focused conversation, follow up and appreciate the progress