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How can MI help leaders navigate difficult conversations and conflicts with team members?

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As a leader, you may face challenging situations that require you to have difficult conversations and resolve conflicts with your team members. Whether it's giving feedback, addressing performance issues, or managing expectations, you need to communicate effectively and respectfully to maintain trust and engagement. But how can you do that without triggering defensiveness, resistance, or resentment? One possible approach is to use motivational interviewing (MI), a collaborative and goal-oriented method of communication that helps people explore and resolve their ambivalence about change. In this article, you will learn how MI can help you navigate difficult conversations and conflicts with your team members by applying four key principles and skills.

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1 The spirit of MI

The spirit of MI is the underlying attitude and philosophy that guides your interactions with your team members. It consists of four elements: partnership, acceptance, compassion, and evocation. Partnership means that you work with your team members as equals, not as experts or authorities. Acceptance means that you respect and appreciate your team members' autonomy, strengths, and perspectives, even if they differ from yours. Compassion means that you care about your team members' well-being and best interests, not just your own agenda. Evocation means that you elicit and draw out your team members' own motivation and resources for change, not impose or prescribe them.

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Dino K.
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It is crucial to understand that your team members are human beings, not mere numbers or machines. They have their own dreams, desires, and personal struggles. Therefore, it's important to treat them with kindness, empathy, and positivity. They may be dealing with issues at home, feeling sad, or frustrated. To effectively communicate with them, it's important to first understand their perspective before asking them to see yours.

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Dr. Joey (The Traveling Social Workers)? Pagano, DSW, LSW, CRS, FPS, Life Coach

?? 2024 Mental Health America, Pittsburgh Recovery Walk Advocate, NASW Emerging Leader, & PA Peer Support Coalition Award Winner?? | 2 X #1 Best-Seller & Pulitzer Contender ??? | Pioneer in SUD Education ??
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As a seasoned SUD social worker, I've found Motivational Interviewing (MI) to be an invaluable tool in guiding leaders through challenging dialogues and resolving conflicts within teams. MI's core principles—empathy, collaboration, and evoking change talk—align perfectly with leadership roles. By actively listening and validating team members' perspectives, leaders can build trust and openness. MI encourages a partnership approach rather than confrontation, promoting a safe space for honest dialogue. The strategic use of open-ended questions and reflective listening in MI helps leaders uncover underlying issues and motivates team members towards positive change.

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Lyricist Cotton, NCC, LCMHC, LCAS
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To have challenging conversations with your team while avoiding defensiveness, resistance, and resentment, you can employ the principles of Motivational Interviewing (MI). Start by expressing empathy and actively listening to understand your team member's perspective and feelings, creating a non-judgmental space. Help them recognize the discrepancy between their current behavior and goals or team expectations, encouraging self-reflection. When faced with resistance, acknowledge it and explore the reasons behind it instead of imposing your viewpoint. Foster a sense of empowerment and confidence in their ability to make changes. Collaboratively identify areas where change is needed and involve them in setting SMART goals.

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2 The principles of MI

The principles of MI are the strategies and techniques that help you apply the spirit of MI in practice. They are based on the acronym RULE: resist the righting reflex, understand your team members' motivations, listen with empathy, and empower your team members. Resist the righting reflex means that you avoid the temptation to correct, advise, or persuade your team members, which can backfire and increase their resistance. Understand your team members' motivations means that you explore and reflect their reasons and values for change, not yours. Listen with empathy means that you pay attention and express curiosity and interest in your team members' experiences, feelings, and goals, not just facts and problems. Empower your team members means that you support and affirm their confidence and ability to change, not doubt or criticize them.

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3 The skills of MI

The skills of MI are the tools and methods that help you implement the principles of MI effectively. They are based on the acronym OARS: open-ended questions, affirmations, reflections, and summaries. Open-ended questions are questions that invite your team members to elaborate and share more information, not yes/no or closed-ended questions. Affirmations are statements that recognize and appreciate your team members' strengths, efforts, and achievements, not compliments or praise. Reflections are statements that restate or paraphrase what your team members have said, not interpretations or assumptions. Summaries are statements that recap and synthesize what your team members have said, not conclusions or recommendations.

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Toni Rose Mieses, LMHC

Therapist | PhD Candidate | Mental Health Clinical Leadership Trainer | Clinician Mental Health Advocate
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A great example of using OARS with your team is when there is lack of clarity or lack of alignment on a particular topic situation. One can use these techniques to ensure they actually have a good understanding of the team member's perspective before shifting into sharing their own perspective or what they believe should happen next.

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4 The process of MI

The process of MI is the framework and sequence that help you structure your conversations and guide your team members toward change. It consists of four phases: engaging, focusing, evoking, and planning. Engaging means that you establish rapport and trust with your team members, not ignore or dismiss them. Focusing means that you identify and agree on a specific goal or direction for change, not impose or assume it. Evoking means that you elicit and strengthen your team members' motivation and commitment for change, not undermine or coerce it. Planning means that you develop and support a realistic and feasible action plan for change, not dictate or neglect it.

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5 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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How can MI help leaders navigate difficult conversations and conflicts with team members?

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1 The spirit of MI

2 The principles of MI

3 The skills of MI

4 The process of MI

5 Here’s what else to consider

Motivational Interviewing

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How can MI help leaders navigate difficult conversations and conflicts with team members?

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2

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1 The spirit of MI

2 The principles of MI

3 The skills of MI

4 The process of MI

5 Here’s what else to consider

Motivational Interviewing

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