Here's how you can navigate defensive reactions to feedback.

Everyone processes things differently. We have to remember we are all Human. Not only do we process things differently but we only see a small part of someone's life. You have no clue what they are going through when you give them this feedback. Understanding and preparing for any situation to happen is best. Make sure you hear them and coach them on how the change can be fixed. But more importantly how can you as a team grow from this.

You can start by accepting we are all humans and we do mistakes and we find difficulties in admitting them or even accept that we did a mistake, By starting any conversation with this concept you should be prepared to understand the people defencive reaction on any kind of feedback, that's why you should pick the right time and circumstances to deliver a feedback for someone, understand their emotions and listed with empathy and offer help not judgments, in this way the person could consider you as an friend or ally not a competitor

More than acknowledging emotions I would even recommend to talk about it! Say something like “I see that this feedback made you uncomfortable. Please know that my intention is supporting your growth. How could we turn this feedback into an actionable plan that works for you?”

HR can organize workshops and trainings that focus on emotional intelligence, such as "Emotional Intelligence" developed by Daniel Goleman. These workshops can help employees understand how emotions affect behavior and decisions in the workplace, and provide strategies to manage emotions effectively.

Understand that feedback can trigger emotional reactions. Anticipate defensiveness as a natural response to protect self-esteem. Use empathetic, constructive language focused on behavior and outcomes, not personal attributes. This minimizes emotional impact.

Teach employees effective time management by identifying productive time and optimizing time use. Create a comfortable and focused work atmosphere to improve employee performance.

Choose the right timing to deliver feedback. Avoid high-stress or vulnerable times. Select a calm, private setting with minimal distractions. Strategic timing increases effectiveness and reduces defensive responses.

Timing and Setting: Choose an appropriate time and private setting for the conversation. Avoid giving feedback when emotions are high or in front of others, as this can heighten defensiveness. Empathize and Listen: Show empathy by acknowledging the recipient's feelings. Listen actively to their perspective without interrupting. This demonstrates respect and helps them feel heard. Encourage Self-Reflection: Ask open-ended questions that prompt self-reflection, such as "How do you feel this project went?" This can help the individual recognize areas for improvement on their own.

Strategic Timing: Deliver feedback at a time when the individual is likely to be receptive. Avoid moments of high stress or vulnerability. Opt for a calm, private setting with minimal distractions to ensure that the feedback can be given and received effectively. Timing your feedback thoughtfully can significantly reduce defensiveness.

Some key considerations around the timing of feedback: - Avoid times of high stress or when the person is already feeling overwhelmed or vulnerable. Feedback is less likely to be well-received in those emotional states. - Choose a calm, private setting with minimal distractions. This allows the recipient to fully focus on the feedback without worrying about anyone overhearing or other pressing matters. - Consider the individual's current state of mind and energy levels. Is this a good time for them to have a thoughtful discussion, or would they be better served by revisiting the feedback when they are more receptive? - Timing can also depend on the nature of the feedback.

HR can communicate with employees specifically about their goals and objectives. This helps employees understand what is expected of them and how they can achieve it.

Provide specific, clear feedback. Avoid vague comments that lead to confusion and defensiveness. Describe observable behaviors, not general statements. Specificity helps recipient understand what to improve, shows feedback is based on concrete examples.

Clarity and Precision: Provide clear and specific feedback. Avoid vague comments that can lead to confusion and defensiveness. Focus on observable actions and specific outcomes that need change. This approach helps the recipient understand exactly what needs improvement and shows that your feedback is based on concrete examples rather than subjective judgments.

Clarity and specificity in feedback are crucial for a few key reasons: 1. It helps the recipient understand exactly what behavior or outcome needs to change. By describing observable actions rather than just making general statements, you give them a clear target to focus their improvement efforts. 2. Specific, behavior-based feedback demonstrates that your input is grounded in concrete examples, not just personal judgments. This can make the feedback feel more objective and constructive. 3. Specificity reduces ambiguity and the potential for the recipient to feel attacked or misunderstand the nature of the feedback. Clear, factual language keeps the focus on the issue at hand.

Vague feedback can lead to confusion and defensiveness. Be clear and specific about the behaviors or actions that need improvement. Use concrete examples to illustrate your points. Specific feedback helps employees understand exactly what is expected and how they can improve.

Una forma de abordar estas reacciones es fomentar un diálogo abierto y honesto. Es crucial crear un entorno donde todos se sientan seguros para expresar sus opiniones y preocupaciones sin temor a represalias. Esto implica escuchar activamente a la persona que proporciona el comentario, mostrando empatía hacia sus puntos de vista y reconociendo la validez de sus opiniones. Además, es importante comunicar nuestras propias emociones de manera asertiva y constructiva. Si nos sentimos defensivos o heridos por un comentario, podemos expresar nuestras preocupaciones de manera respetuosa y buscar claridad sobre el mensaje detrás de la retroalimentación. Esto puede ayudar a evitar malentendidos y promover un diálogo más productivo.

Provide relevant and accurate information about company and industry developments. Ensure employees know how to access relevant information and have access to the necessary resources.

Encourage two-way dialogue around feedback. Allow recipient to share their perspective and feelings. This promotes clarification, mutual understanding, and co-creation of an improvement plan. Open exchange reduces defensiveness, builds trust for constructive feedback.

Promote Open Conversation: Make feedback a two-way dialogue rather than a monologue. Encourage the recipient to share their perspective and feelings about the feedback. This mutual exchange fosters understanding, reduces defensiveness, and helps build trust. Collaborative discussions also aid in co-creating a plan for improvement, making the feedback more actionable and less confrontational.

Encourage Open Dialogue: Make feedback a two-way conversation instead of a one-sided monologue. Invite the recipient to express their thoughts and feelings about the feedback. This mutual exchange enhances understanding, lowers defensiveness, and strengthens trust. Collaborative discussions also help in jointly developing an improvement plan, making the feedback more practical and less adversarial.

Providing guidance and resources as part of the feedback process offers several key benefits: 1. It demonstrates a genuine commitment to the recipient's growth and success, not just identifying problems. 2. It turns the feedback into a collaborative effort, rather than just a one-way critique. 3. It equips the recipient with the specific knowledge, skills, or support they need to address the areas for improvement. 4. It reduces the risk of the recipient feeling demoralized or overwhelmed by the feedback, as they have a clear path forward.

Offer support and resources for improvement along with feedback. Provide tools, training, or mentorship to help address areas needing work. This demonstrates commitment to the recipient's growth, turning feedback into a development opportunity.

Provide Resources and Guidance: Accompany your feedback with support for the recipient's development. Offer tools, training, or mentorship to help them address the areas needing improvement. Demonstrating your commitment to their growth can transform a defensive situation into a positive opportunity for learning and advancement.

Communicate clear and open information about the terms and conditions of employment, including salary, benefits, and employee rights. Ensure employees understand their concerns and questions before decisions are made.

Offer support and turn it into a educational opportunity for this individual. Instead of just telling them where they went wrong, supporting them to do better will always turn the situation into a positive.

The follow up will also communicate that you care - that you were honest in your aspiration to help someone change and guide them through any questions they might still have about going forward. It will also help you assess if the person has understood the feedback (after any potential emotions have settled down) and is really acting on it - which will give you an opportunity to provide praise/recognition for improvements.

Consistently follow up after providing feedback. Check in periodically to demonstrate ongoing support, acknowledge progress, adjust strategies if needed, and maintain open communication. This reinforces the value of feedback and the individual's growth efforts.

Consistency and Continued Support: Regular follow-ups are crucial for sustaining improvement. After providing feedback and discussing an improvement plan, check in periodically to show ongoing support and interest in the individual's progress. This follow-up allows you to acknowledge improvements, adjust strategies if needed, and maintain open communication. Reinforcing feedback through follow-up helps underline its value and supports the individual's efforts to grow.

Balance Positive and Negative Feedback: Use the "sandwich" method by starting with positive feedback, addressing areas for improvement, and ending on a positive note. This makes the feedback more palatable and balanced. Follow-Up: Offer support and resources for improvement. Schedule follow-up meetings to discuss progress and provide continued encouragement. Model Receptiveness: Demonstrate how to receive feedback gracefully. Share your own experiences with feedback and how you used it to grow, showing that it’s a universal and beneficial process.

Feedback should not be a one-time event. Follow up with the employee to discuss their progress and any additional support they might need. Regular check-ins demonstrate your commitment to their development and help to reinforce positive changes, reducing the likelihood of future defensive reactions.

When dealing with defensive reactions to feedback, it's important to stay calm and understanding. Start by acknowledging the other person's feelings and perspective. Focus on the facts and specific behaviors rather than making it personal. Use "I" statements to express your own feelings and observations and avoid blaming or accusing language. Encourage open dialogue and ask questions to clarify misunderstandings. Always show support to the other person so he must feel heard.

Use a softer language instead of harsh or absolute terms i.e. use words that show probability instead of surety. For instance, use words like "might," “often,” "could," or "sometimes” instead of words like “always” “never” etc. And always begin by acknowledging their strengths and avoid comparisons. Your feedback should reflect growth mindset instead of a fixed mindset.

1. Start Positive: Acknowledge strengths and recognise wins first. 2. Stick to Facts: Focus on objective facts, not feelings. 3. Use Examples: Provide specific examples to illustrate points. 4. Create a Safe Environment: Ensure recipient is feeling psychologically safe before proceeding with feedback. 5. Actively Listen and Receive Feedback: Actively listen, validate perspectives and be open to feedback yourself. Using these strategies helped me turn critical feedback into a positive, constructive experience, strengthening relationships and driving development.

When giving feedback, remember that defensiveness is a natural human response. Instead of using the term "feedback," which can trigger the fight or flight reaction, opt for "sharing thoughts" or "ideas." Always ask permission before offering feedback to show respect and give the recipient autonomy. They can always say, "Not right now." Choose your moments wisely – not every mistake requires immediate feedback. If it's a one-time occurrence, prioritize support over critique. When providing feedback, avoid labels and be specific about the impact of their actions. Finally, lead by example and regularly seek feedback from your team. This builds trust and establishes feedback as a two-way street, fostering a culture of continuous learning.

Here are additional considerations: - Stay Neutral: Keep your tone and body language neutral to prevent escalating emotions. Avoid sounding judgmental, and maintain a calm demeanor to help the recipient feel at ease. - Highlight Positives: Balance feedback by highlighting the individual's strengths. This reinforces their positive attributes and shows the feedback aims for improvement, not just criticism. - Focus on Solutions: Shift the conversation towards finding solutions rather than dwelling on the problem. Encourage the recipient to consider ways to address the feedback and offer your support. By integrating these strategies, you can help the individuals feel supported and motivated to improve.