Here's how you can harness emotional intelligence to navigate change as a personal coach.

As we are taught, labeling emotions and penning down expressions are effective tools to deal with emotions, I believe this practice must start with the coach himself/herself. Humans are indeed build of emotions and no study, research, work or profession can make a human NOT experience it. Hence, it is best to keep it real and figure out what works the best for you to manage it before engaging with a client. Biggest consequence that dilutes the quality, if a coach doesn't understand EI starting self :- cognitive bias activation while in a coaching conversation !!

Fortunately or unfortunately, I have had many instances when I can look back for examples of when I was in the grip of an emotion (and which family of emotion). There's no shortcut to this step and everyone who wants to be successful in developing their EQ, must do this work and CONTINUE to do this work. I can never over emphasise this point enough - Awareness is key to any kind of learning, growth, and/or development.

My favourite tool for assessing my emotions (and accompanying thoughts) whenever something happens is to step back and refuse all further participation or engagement until I have properly answered the question, "What am I actually seeing/hearing here?" I personally use some philosophy from Stoicism to help me refine that thinking process to more accurately clarify and assess how I actually feel about specific things I picked up. and whether that is appropriate or not, constructive or destructive, and hold it up against my values, my beliefs, and my priorities. Particularly useful when my clients tell me something emotionally loaded or try to avoid answering my questions.

As a personal coach, harnessing emotional intelligence to navigate change involves cultivating resilience in both oneself and one's clients. Firstly, self-awareness is key; understanding one's own emotions, triggers, and coping mechanisms enables the coach to model resilience effectively. By practicing self-regulation, managing stress, and maintaining a positive outlook, the coach sets an example for clients facing change. Empathy plays a crucial role in connecting with clients on an emotional level, validating their experiences, and providing support through uncertainty. Social skills enable effective communication, fostering trust and collaboration in navigating change together.

Empathy is a misused word, and actually backfires in coaching if used to "feel what the client feels". Rapport doesn't need to be THAT deep. You cannot be effective in coaching if you feel the same as your client because you will also be in the grip of that emotion, which is artificial (because you never experienced what they did). Coaches are not able to listen dispassionately and think clearly if they are empathising in that way. Rather it is compassion and even to a certain degree, sympathy; never crossing the emotional threshold to pull the client to your side, rather than being stuck emotionally with the client in the grip of emotion. As a coach, it's unhealthy to carry your client's emotional baggage, and not what you are hired to do.

emotional intelligence is a valuable tool for personal coaches when working with clients during times of change. By harnessing empathy, trust-building, self-awareness, and conflict management skills, coaches can support their clients effectively and guide them through the process of adapting to new circumstances. Ultimately, emotional intelligence can help coaches create a positive and empowering coaching experience for their clients, leading to long-lasting personal growth and development.