Dealing with a passive-aggressive client in coaching: How can you effectively address their behavior?

The first thing to do at this point would be ACKNOWLEDGE and AGREE to what and how they are feeling. If it looks like there's some built up frustration and denial, I always make sure to let them know that I understand, and them feeling that way is completely validated. Along with this, you might as well bring different perspectives to the table as a solution to bring them into your confidence. All in all, make them feel heard and having a detailed conversation, (sometimes in-person) helps a lot!

1. Stop, don't jump in until you have really listened to the client. What's the underlaying beef? Why are they exhibiting passive-agressive behaviour? What is their motivation? Can you put yourself in their shoes (without saying a word). 2. Reflect - then acknowledge their concerns and seek to position the conversation around their self acknowledgment of their position. 3. Ask how they may consider addressing the acknowleded situation/position. Would they like help in progressing a new way forward? 4. Consider self-set actions to be taken forward with a mutually agreed follow up. Always consider the person holistically to ensure that the approach does not end up being you-focussed or environment focussed. Guide self-exploration.

While giving more time to listen will be powerful in such situations and in my experience there is a tendency to deflect so bringing back commitment from coachee requires effort. You may pause to re-start.

Since each person's manifestation of passive aggression is unique, begin by observing the particular behaviors the person usually exhibits.. Use humour, tactful wording, and avoid overreacting to defuse stressful situations while also drawing attention to the passive-aggressive behaviour. You are encouraging improvement in the relationship by modelling direct communication and asking the passive-aggressive individual to participate in coming up with a solution. While it can be tough, showing empathy and compassion to someone who is difficult can be highly beneficial.

Facing the situation with respect is fundamental, as it helps build trust and openness. Create spaces to actively listen your client, ensuring they feel heard and understood. Ask questions to dig into the situation and better understand their perspective. Practice empathy. Promote an environment where both parties feel psychologically safe to engage, free from judgement. Avoid over-emotional reactions that could create a barrier in the communication. Instead remain calm and composed to facilitate constructive discussions

Listen to understand, hear to respond. A lot of the time people are thinking one step ahead and are already preparing an answer to an unknown comment or question. In a fast paced world, sometimes its better to stop, listen, understand and then respond.

Practicing Empathy and Curiosity is important for a coach at this juncture to understand and accept, where the client is coming from. Having genuine concern for client’s growth enables the coach to create safe and open environment for the client to express his or her thoughts and feelings.

Begin by creating a safe and non-judgmental space where the client feels comfortable expressing their feelings. Use open-ended questions to encourage them to share what's on their mind, such as "I've noticed some hesitation during our sessions. Can you tell me more about what's going on?" ?? Listen actively and acknowledge their emotions without interrupting or dismissing their concerns. Reflect their statements back to them to show understanding and to clarify any misunderstandings. This approach can help uncover underlying issues and foster a more honest and productive relationship. Remember, addressing passive-aggressive behavior is like diffusing a bomb – it requires patience, care, and a steady hand, but the results are worth it! ????

1. Free flowing conversations should happen once the ground level is set 2. Respect for each other matters a lot 3. Frequent inspection and adaption is crucial 4. There is no concept of judgement , only exchange of thoughts

Trabalhei com um cliente que usava sarcasmo e procrastina??o, o que dificultava o progresso. Estabeleci limites claros, destacando a importancia da honestidade e do respeito mútuo, e deixei claro que tais comportamentos n?o seriam aceitos. Comuniquei minhas expectativas, criei um ambiente seguro para expressar preocupa??es e foquei nas conquistas, o que resultou em uma resposta mais positiva e avan?o significativo.

For me it depends how bad it is. Passive aggressive is a pretty strong claim. I think it’s vital to quickly ascertain whether you actually want to continue working with this client. If not, it’s ok to end the coaching relationship. Working with the wrong people is the fastest way to falling out of love with coaching. If it’s your business, refund them. If it’s a corporate client, find a coach that’s a better fit for them.

-. Setting clear expectations is important - this happens when respect between both parties exists - stick to the point and look for guidance - time is crucial , especially when coach speaks and sticking to the context helps in a big way

Setting clear boundaries is crucial. Explain what behavior is acceptable and what is not, and outline the consequences of continued passive-aggressiveness. I had to establish a boundary with a client who frequently missed sessions without notice. By setting this boundary, it became clear what was expected, and the behavior improved.

I believe that sometimes people aren't even aware they are communicating in a passive aggressive way as this is what they have always done. If we don't provide constructive feedback we are doing them a disservice and not giving them an opportunity for growth and change.

One thing I have found helpful is to reframe feedback as a gesture of kindness and faith in the potential and success of this collaborative relationship!

Passive aggression behaviour stems from past experience. By using radical candour ( Kim Scott’s ) as feedback tool I have seen clients respond positively and acknowledge the behaviours. They are willing to recognise the pattern and identify behaviours that will complement their goals.

Passive aggressive behavior can also be because the mentee is uncomfortable accepting that someone else can do a better job in improving them than themselves. Specifically when the mentor is not known to them or not someone they admire. It get’s down to building trust and it needs time. One way it can be sped up, is by asking for introspection on the specific behavior while providing appropriate articles/books and using them to fill the gaps. One needs to get comfortable with awkward silence and let the person stumble onto the right answers rather than blunt feedback.

What I found useful in such cases is referring to contracting and reflecting back. The contracting part is useful to remind the coachee of their goals and that they are responsible for the results, hence repeatedly committing to an action plan and not delivering is a suboptimal strategy and a waste of both our time. Reflecting back can take the form of open questions : "What would you do if you were in my shoes and your coachee would say that?", "How else could you have approached this?", "What do you expect the outcome of this would be?" Post reflecting the coachee's behavior, we can commonly explore the reasons behind and then encourage the coachee to think of a more useful/efficient mindset/strategy to reach their objectives.

Trabalhei com um cliente que apresentava comportamento passivo-agressivo, muitas vezes adiando tarefas e demonstrando resistência sutil. Para enfrentar essa situa??o, adotei uma abordagem focada em incentivar a responsabilidade. Comecei ajudando o cliente a entender que era responsável por suas a??es e pelos resultados que elas geravam. Trabalhei junto com ele para definir metas e prazos realistas e implementei um sistema de acompanhamento regular para verificar o progresso. Quando o cliente cumpriu seus compromissos, reconheci seus esfor?os para refor?ar o comportamento positivo. Essa abordagem n?o só ajudou a combater a passividade, mas também promoveu um avan?o mais significativo no coaching.

Encouraging accountability is essential for change. Help clients take responsibility for their actions by setting realistic goals and tracking progress. One of my clients struggled with meeting deadlines. We started using a shared progress tracker, which made them more accountable and significantly improved their commitment.

C’est connu, plus on est responsabilisé plus on est “sage”. Pour créer un climat de tempérance, il faut valoriser les moindres aptitudes et altitudes positives de ce dernier (Attention à ne pas en faire trop). L’exposer comme un exemple pour le peu qu’il fait le conditionnera à faire encore plus.

What I have found helpful is providing a composition notebook and allowing the individual to start writing down goals, ideas and norms for life. That way when it is written down they can reference them when they fall short of accomplishing them or become discouraged during the process.

Fostering an environment of growth and improvement can gradually change passive-aggressive behavior. Celebrate small wins and progress to reinforce positive behavior. I once celebrated a client’s consistency in meeting smaller milestones, which motivated them to tackle bigger challenges with a more proactive attitude.

Effectivement, Signifier clairement qu’il s’agit d’une opportunité en or de se revaloriser, de grandir et d’accro?tre sa valeur personnelle et professionnelle.

Dealing with passive-aggressive behavior in coaching takes patience, understanding, and good communication skills. It's crucial to create a supportive environment and directly address any underlying issues. It's also important to separate the person's behavior from who they are as a person. Focus on helping coachees overcome these behaviors to make real progress. Here are three ways to do this: 1. Model Positive Behavior: Show openness and patience to encourage the coachee to do the same. 2. Use Reflective Listening: Repeat back what the coachee says in your own words to show you understand them. 3. Set Boundaries: Clearly outline what is acceptable and expected for respectful and productive conversations.

Honestly - the key here is to have the correct systems in place to avoid attracting the wrong clients to start with. The red flags and gut feelings are important to take note of. Never let the appeal of being paid, influence working with the right types of clients. It’s all in the qualification criteria you set and sticking to this. The wrong client will cost you more than you think.

Know When to Walk Away! Not everyone is coachable and not everyone, even those who pay you are entitled to your time, expertise or patience. Assess whether the relationship is worth saving and what might be triggering the passive aggressive behaviour, if it originates from a lack of respect for you, it's not worth saving. And if you do decide to end it, do so gracefully and professionally, ensuring the client understands your reasons for ending the relationship. The coaching relationship should be productive and beneficial for both parties.

Sometimes clients may not be aware of the passive aggressive behaviour. In fact that can potentially be one of the barriers and defence mechanism that could be getting in the way to personal accountability and or positive critical thinking. Discussing the pattern openly can lead to an awareness breakthrough that could Forster trust and growth.

It's important to understand that underneath passive-agressive behavior is always fear. Helping them become aware of the specific fear will create a path.