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Last updated on 2024年8月1日

You're faced with a defensive colleague. How can you offer feedback that fosters growth?

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Navigating the waters of workplace dynamics can be challenging, especially when you're trying to help a colleague who seems defensive. Offering feedback is a delicate art, and when done correctly, it can lead to professional growth and improved staff development. The key is to approach the situation with empathy, patience, and clear communication. By understanding the reasons behind your colleague's defensiveness and tailoring your feedback to be constructive, you can transform a potentially negative interaction into a positive developmental opportunity.

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Cris Fazzi

Especialista em Recursos Humanos | HRBP | Gest?o de Talentos e Cultura | Recrutamento | Desenvolvimento | Avalia??o de…
Gisele Lopes

Psicóloga clínica | Psicanalista | Assessora acadêmica

1 Understand Emotions

When you're dealing with a defensive colleague, it's crucial to recognize the emotions at play . Defensiveness often stems from feeling threatened or insecure. Before diving into feedback, take a moment to empathize with your colleague's position. This doesn't mean you have to agree with their perspective, but acknowledging their feelings can create a more receptive environment for your message. By demonstrating that you understand their emotions, you build trust and open the door to a more productive dialogue.

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Martim Bordini

Diretor Executivo I Mentor de Líderes I Especialista em Lideran?a
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Lidar com um colega defensivo, é muito genérico a coloca??o e portanto dificulta entender no que ele ou ela é defensivo, a n?o ser que você tenha exemplos da situa??o para pensar como abordar. No mínimo é preciso perguntar se a pessoa está interessada e permite uma abordagem, isso para n?o ser invasivo. Pode ser que a pessoa n?o tenha nenhum interesse em tocar no assunto. Mesmo que a pessoa aceite é necessário verificar se você tem habilidade suficente para conduzir o diálogo. Imaginando que tomou todas as precau??es, inicie o diálogo e cuidado para n?o ser invasivo.

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2 Choose Timing

Timing is everything when it comes to giving feedback. You must choose a moment when your colleague is most likely to be receptive. This might be after a successful project completion or during a period of calm, rather than in the midst of a stressful deadline or immediately following a challenging event. By selecting an opportune moment, you increase the chances that your feedback will be heard and considered rather than dismissed out of hand.

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3 Frame Positively

The way you frame your feedback can make a significant difference in how it's received. Start with positive observations and express appreciation for your colleague's strengths and contributions. Then, gently introduce areas for improvement by focusing on specific behaviors rather than personal traits. This positive framing helps to cushion the impact of constructive criticism and encourages a growth mindset.

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Cris Fazzi

Especialista em Recursos Humanos | HRBP | Gest?o de Talentos e Cultura | Recrutamento | Desenvolvimento | Avalia??o de Desempenho | DEI | Gest?o de Mudan?as | Estratégia de RH | Employee Experience
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Recentemente, precisei oferecer feedback a uma colega que estava sendo defensiva. Comecei destacando suas contribui??es e pontos fortes, reconhecendo seu empenho e habilidades. Depois, com cuidado, abordei áreas que precisavam de melhoria, focando em comportamentos específicos e n?o em características pessoais. Esse enfoque positivo ajudou a suavizar a crítica e a encorajou a ver o feedback como uma oportunidade de crescimento, n?o uma crítica. Ao enquadrar o feedback de forma construtiva, consegui promover uma mentalidade de aprimoramento e colabora??o.

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Sophia Kelly, PhD, BCBA

Behavior Analyst at SAD 6
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A couple things I have found helpful is the use of “I” statements and the listen first concept. When you approach feedback with using statements like “I see ___”, “ I feel ___”, or the like as compared to you statements. It allows the person to see that this is your perspective of events as to blaming. This can very open up a conversation instead of an argument. Furthermore, once the conversation is started, the use of truly listening to understand instead of responding is key. Using statement like “so I hear that you are saying____” not only allows the person to know you were really listening but lessens the chances for misunderstanding. This practice can also help with a person that may become defensive while getting feedback.

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4 Be Specific

Vague feedback is not only unhelpful but can also exacerbate defensiveness. Be as specific as possible about what your colleague can do differently. Provide clear examples and actionable suggestions. This specificity helps to clarify expectations and provides a roadmap for improvement. It also demonstrates that your feedback is thoughtful and based on observable facts, which can reduce feelings of personal attack.

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5 Encourage Dialogue

Feedback should be a two-way street. Encourage your colleague to share their perspective and engage in an open dialogue about the feedback. Ask questions to understand their point of view and listen actively to their responses. This exchange can uncover valuable insights into their behavior and thought processes, which can inform how you provide support and guidance moving forward.

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6 Follow Up

Finally, don't let the feedback conversation be a one-off event. Schedule a follow-up to discuss progress and address any new challenges that may have arisen. This ongoing support not only shows your commitment to your colleague's development but also reinforces the idea that growth is a continuous process . Regular check-ins can help keep your colleague on track and demonstrate that you are invested in their success.

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7 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Gisele Lopes

Psicóloga clínica | Psicanalista | Assessora acadêmica
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Tenha certeza de que você próprio está em condi??es de aplicar este feedback. Um colega que age na defensiva pode se colocar passivo agressivamente ao receber críticas. N?o podemos esquecer que nestas circunstancias há dois seres humanos envolvidos e esta rea??o pode ter potencial de desestruturar o líder também. Portanto é crucial estar preparado emocionalmente para n?o permitir que a situa??o fuja do controle, fira egos ou se torne uma discuss?o sem propósito.

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You're faced with a defensive colleague. How can you offer feedback that fosters growth?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Understand Emotions

2 Choose Timing

3 Frame Positively

4 Be Specific

5 Encourage Dialogue

6 Follow Up

7 Here’s what else to consider

Staff Development

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You're faced with a defensive colleague. How can you offer feedback that fosters growth?

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

1 Understand Emotions

2 Choose Timing

3 Frame Positively

4 Be Specific

5 Encourage Dialogue

6 Follow Up

7 Here’s what else to consider

Staff Development

给文章评分

感谢您的反馈

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