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You’re dealing with a difficult coworker. How can you use empathy to build a better relationship?

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Working with a difficult coworker can be stressful and frustrating, especially if you have to collaborate on projects or tasks. You may feel like avoiding them, arguing with them, or complaining about them to others. However, these strategies can make the situation worse and damage your reputation. Instead, you can use empathy to build a better relationship with your difficult coworker and improve your work environment. Here are some tips on how to do that.

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Amit Kashyap

Chief Business Officer @ Traves India | Representative South Asia @ STI Security

1 What is empathy?

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings, thoughts, and perspectives of another person. It does not mean that you agree with them or condone their behavior, but that you can see where they are coming from and why they act the way they do. Empathy can help you communicate more effectively, resolve conflicts, and build trust with others.

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2 How to show empathy

To show empathy to your difficult coworker, you need to listen actively, ask open-ended questions, and use reflective statements. Listening actively means paying attention to what they say, how they say it, and what they don't say. It also means avoiding interruptions, distractions, and judgments. Asking open-ended questions means using questions that start with who, what, where, when, why, and how, instead of yes or no questions. These questions can help you explore their situation, feelings, and needs. Using reflective statements means repeating or paraphrasing what they say to show that you understand and acknowledge their point of view.

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3 How to use empathy to resolve conflicts

Using empathy can help you resolve conflicts with your difficult coworker by creating a safe and respectful space for dialogue. When you use empathy, you can avoid escalating the tension, blaming, or criticizing, and instead focus on finding a common ground and a mutually beneficial solution. To do this, start by identifying the problem and the emotions involved. Express your empathy and validate their feelings, then share your perspective and feelings using "I" statements. Ask them to clarify their position and what they want or need from the situation. Work together to brainstorm possible solutions that can address both parties' needs, then agree on a solution and follow up to ensure it is working.

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Kathrin Laborda

Erfolg braucht Vertrauen, Vertrauen schafft Wachstum.
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Empathie erleben wir in Entspannung, was kannst du tun, um entspannter zu sein und Empathie künftig in deiner Kommunikation einflie?en zu lassen?

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4 How to use empathy to build rapport

Using empathy can help you build rapport with your difficult coworker by demonstrating that you care about them and value their contribution. This can create a positive and supportive atmosphere, where both of you can appreciate each other's strengths and learn from each other's weaknesses. To use empathy to build rapport, you should give genuine compliments and feedback, show interest and curiosity, offer help and support, and have fun and laugh together. Recognize their achievements, skills, and efforts, ask them about their hobbies, interests, and goals, express your gratitude when they help or support you, and find opportunities to relax and have fun with them. Doing these things can reduce stress, boost morale, and create a bond.

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5 How to deal with empathy fatigue

Using empathy can be rewarding and beneficial, but it can also be draining and exhausting, leading to empathy fatigue. This state of emotional and mental exhaustion can affect your well-being, performance, and relationships. To deal with empathy fatigue, you need to set healthy boundaries and limits, practice self-care and self-compassion, and seek support and feedback. Know when to say no, take a break, or seek help. Take care of your physical, mental, and emotional needs by doing things that make you happy. Reach out to people who can listen to you and support you. Get feedback from your manager or mentor on how to improve your empathy skills and cope with your difficult coworker.

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6 Here’s what else to consider

This is a space to share examples, stories, or insights that don’t fit into any of the previous sections. What else would you like to add?

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Amit Kashyap

Chief Business Officer @ Traves India | Representative South Asia @ STI Security
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While working in global matrix structured organizations; the most important aspect is to understand the perspective and viewpoint of others. Most of the time we see that different functions of an organization try to achieve their respective goals and in hindsight miss the overall purpose and collective milestone set for organization. To overcome these kind of scenarios one need to build a mindset to detach him/herself from micro detailing and consider the bigger picture.

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You’re dealing with a difficult coworker. How can you use empathy to build a better relationship?

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2

3

4

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1 What is empathy?

2 How to show empathy

3 How to use empathy to resolve conflicts

4 How to use empathy to build rapport

5 How to deal with empathy fatigue

6 Here’s what else to consider

Conflict Resolution

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You’re dealing with a difficult coworker. How can you use empathy to build a better relationship?

1

2

3

4

5

6

1 What is empathy?

2 How to show empathy

3 How to use empathy to resolve conflicts

4 How to use empathy to build rapport

5 How to deal with empathy fatigue

6 Here’s what else to consider

Conflict Resolution

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